I went out last Friday with some friends. It was a last minute spur of the moment thing, and I said to OH "I won't get drunk and will be home on the last bus" (around 11.30pm).
We have a 17 month old who is breastfed and co-sleeps. He wakes most nights to nurse. We didn't prepare for me to go out, ie. express any milk, and I had to work the next day. I am casually employed so if I don't work I don't get paid.
I got very very VERY drunk. To the point that I was sick and thrown out of the club. I also ignored my mobile all evening and crawled home at 3.30am in a taxi.
My LO was awake and upset and nothing would settle him. I breastfed him and he fell asleep. OH was very angry. We all went to bed - and woke up in the morning with my toddler's breath smelling of alcohol, OH very tired and angry and me with a horrible hangover. I called in sick at work and then spent the day apologising and grovelling to LO and OH.
We all agreed I was an idiot, and it won't happen again.
Then today I spoke to my friends and my sister about it. And they all say my OH is making a big deal of nothing, and that I am entitled to a night out once in a while. (I last went out in January) They think my OH is being unreasonable and should be abe to settle our son to sleep on his own and should deal with the situation that I am not there if it crops up. They said "he would probably do the same." and "he's had nights out/weekends away. Why can't you?".
But I think they are missing the point. If my OH said he would be soberly arriving home on the last bus, but clattered through the door 4 hours later drunk as a skunk I would be fuming.
I don't really get why a 17 month old couldn't have cow's milk if you weren't there or had drunk too much? Even semi-skimmed as a one off would surely be better than toddler getting enough alcohol to have boozy breath ?
erm perhaps the baby didn't want cows milk. perhaps he wanted breastmilk as he is used to it every night.
i doubt his breath smelt of booze either. and if it did it was probably because the alcohol was coming out through your pores rather than in your milk. (not saying the alcohol didn't come through in teh milk, justthat it wouldn't have been enough to make teh breath smell)
Just to be clear I don't have a problem with toddlers having night feeds of breastmilk (and neither did DS) but surely as a one off a bit of improvisation is possible? I'd be disappointed if DP didn't manage to sort DS out with something available to him by the time he was 17 months.
That said crawling home 4 hours late is pretty U so I'd have to agree with you there.