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AIBU?

to not want to collect parcels for neighbours?

67 replies

oranges · 15/12/2010 17:43

What's the etiquette on this? I'm at home on maternity leave and being driven nuts by delivery men ringing to ask if they can leave parcels for neighbours. They wake the baby, and then get woken again when the neighbours come round to collect. I take parcels from the house right next door as I know them, we chat and every now and then they appear with cakes for us. But I've started refusing houses further down as I have no idea who lives there, and I really cant be bothered finding a safe place to keep bulky parcels out of the children's way. One delivery man just huffed at me, when I politely declined to take delivery.
I always get stuff delivered to dh's office, or make sure I'm in for delivery dates. I've never used the neighbours like this. So AIBU?

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bibbitybobbitysantahat · 15/12/2010 17:45

Yanbu.

But when baby is sleeping stick a big note saying PLEASE DO NOT KNOCK on the door.

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AnnoyingOrange · 15/12/2010 17:45

YABU

I always did it for the neighbours when I was a SAHM

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RevoltingPeasant · 15/12/2010 17:45

Put a sign on your door saying, 'Please don't ring the doorbell as my newborn baby is sleeping.'

Heads the issue off without getting into 'using the neighbours' etc.

But YANBU on that score: I work f/t outside the home and just get stuff sent to the office. Not difficult...

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MadamDeathstare · 15/12/2010 17:46

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RevoltingPeasant · 15/12/2010 17:46

And leave the sign up all day; you don't have to act as a collection service unless you want to.

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pumperspumpkin · 15/12/2010 17:47

YABU. It's only a parcel and if your baby is such a delicate sleeper then do you refuse all visitors and creep around in silence whilst they are asleep?

Not all places give you a delivery date, my husband's work bans them from receiving personal post or deliveries to work - or my work for example is an hour on public transport in the rush hour away.

Do you really want to live somewhere where none of the neighbours will do anything for anyone?

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DuelingFanio · 15/12/2010 17:48

I second a note on teh door. They can leave it with someone else.

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oranges · 15/12/2010 17:52

ooh, my first aibu and I've got replies Grin

We live in quite a nice street and don't want to put a sign up as it seems quite huffy, and despite this post, I am quite a nice neighbour.

pumperspumpkin - if the baby gets woken by a genuine visitor or phone call, at least I get something out of it -a friendly word, a chat, or cup of tea.

I started refusing after I realised one house was ordering major stuff, like washing machines and furniture, and not bothering to be in during delivery as they were assuming I would collect. At one point I had a giant plasma tv in my hall for days. And now its Christmas its getign a bit ridiculous, to be running up and down stairs with a velcro baby, dealing with other people's deliveries.

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MadamDeathstare · 15/12/2010 17:52

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GiddyPickle · 15/12/2010 17:53

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MadamDeathstare · 15/12/2010 17:53

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BigBadMummy · 15/12/2010 17:54

Just refuse.

When drivers ask if I will sign for people across the road, who we do not know. I say "no".

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pumperspumpkin · 15/12/2010 17:54

Ok - giant plasma screen is ridiculous!

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MadamDeathstare · 15/12/2010 17:56

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webwiz · 15/12/2010 17:56

I took so many parcels in for all my surrounding neighbours last year that the delivery man was thrilled when he had one that was actually for us.

I do get a bit fed up with it especially as I'm trying to work at home and sometimes the parcels are quite big. One of the things delivered was a giant mirror that we ended up with for about three days. I was terrified that DS would accidentally bump into it and break it (yes he is 14 but he doesn't know how long his arms are).

If it was any further away than immediate neighbours then I'd say no as well.

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snowedinthesticks · 15/12/2010 17:56

I don't know what the etiquette is but I do value good neighbours, especially when you have children.
I don't know where you live but I live in a small village and my neighbours have been worth their weight in gold over the years.

Does it really wake the baby day in day out?
If so I guess you have to say no. If you can do it though, you might find one day those neighbours will be happy to do you a favour in some other way.

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MadamDeathstare · 15/12/2010 17:57

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Porcelain · 15/12/2010 17:57

New baby YANBU. Cover the doorbell and put a note asking for no visitors.
Collecting for neighbours you don't know YANBU. You are taking responsibility for parcels that might have been sent to the wrong address or someone who moved.
Collecting for the next door neighbour who you know, I would say is OK, it's the sort of nice thing neighbours do.

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ShoppingDays · 15/12/2010 17:57

YANBU. Take them now and again to be a good neighbour but you don't need to say yes every time at all.

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oranges · 15/12/2010 17:58

the worst offenders are a group in a house share who never talk to us and throw loud parties. I dont mind the parties as they are usually on a saturday night, but they arent the type of people who will ever become part of the community, iyswim?

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Porcelain · 15/12/2010 18:01

Oh and large household appliances is taking the piss, I thought you meant Amazon boxes, Parcelforce and the like.

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panettoinydog · 15/12/2010 18:01

yabu. seems like such a small deal.

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JimmyChooChoo · 15/12/2010 18:02

But if the OP puts a sign reading 'Do not knock-newborn baby sleeping' then she'll miss her own parcels..
I'm a SAHM at the moment and I always take parcels for the neighbours(but I'm soft)Smile

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NewYearsResolution · 15/12/2010 18:02

lol at velcro baby!

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TattyDevine · 15/12/2010 18:04

YANBU in essence but its a shame you can't find a way of doing it at this time of year with snow and delays and the fact that its Christmas. This busy time is not going to last for much longer.

I dont blame you if they wake up the baby though, that is a pain.

I take in parcels for anybody and everybody. It used to be me - I worked in London, wasn't allowed to have anything delivered to work and the Royal Mail sorting office closed at 6pm, an hour and a half before I got home. I used to be so grateful. I once put chocolates through my neighbours letterbox with a note of thanks because she'd taken about 3 parcels in 2 weeks (it was around Christmas time)

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