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To be so over the baby bit?

(36 Posts)
carocaro Mon 29-Nov-10 18:10:53

Have two children aged 4 and 9, a few friends have had their first or second babies recently.

All the smells and crap they create. Not forgetting the crawling one's. Had some over today and they wrecked my house. One had nasty cradle cap that really smelt and the mother in question thought it OK for me to hold the baby for ages! And the other had a toddler with a big plop and it took her half and hour to change him; I had to open a window it was vile.

I've been there and done it and I don't like other peoples messy food squashing into the floor, dribbling, poo stinking babies and wrecking toddlers. They won't be coming again. And they did not clear up their crud before leaving, which I used to do.

AIBU to be so over that stage?

violethill Mon 29-Nov-10 18:13:14

A bit OTT to never invite them back!

But YANBU for having moved on. I think loads of people feel the same. Loved my own babies, not particularly charmed by other peoples. And as for stinky nappies and messy food everywhere... nope, doesn't float my boat.

Chil1234 Mon 29-Nov-10 18:13:58

YANBU... All of the above is just about tolerable when it's your own flesh and blood.

howtoapproach Mon 29-Nov-10 18:15:17

YANBU it's when they change a huge poofest of a nappy in the living room right in front of you - the whole room ends up smelling like poo.

TattyDevine Mon 29-Nov-10 18:17:20

I dont blame you one little bit. And that's from someone with a 3 year old and 1 year old.

I can't wait till there are no nappies to change, no children announcing that they "need a poo poo", nobody following you into the toilet and trying to climb on you while you yourself are trying to poo.

No snail trails on your shoulders from them wiping snot you didn't even realise they had hidden up their nostrils on you.

Not having faded patches on your knees from spending all bloody day on the floor.

Not having to sweep the kitchen in its entirety after every meal, and hoover every day (or get hubby to do it) because it comes through in the folds of fabric in their clothes or down their top and just gets everywhere no matter how many bibs.

No fingerprints on the TV or glasswork because they are old enough to simply understand and remember not to touch it.

To be able to say "go and get dressed please" or "time to get shoes on" and they do it. If they are hungry, they go and have a piece of toast.

I can't wait!


Unrulysun Mon 29-Nov-10 18:20:08

Awwwwwwwwww you sound lovely. I wish you were my friend.

RockinRobinBird Mon 29-Nov-10 18:21:24

YANBU but the tone is a bit nasty. And the baby's cradle cap smelled so bad it was offensive to you to hold her? Really? Poor child.

doozle Mon 29-Nov-10 18:22:49


JamieLeeCurtis Mon 29-Nov-10 18:27:18

YANBU totally U (I would not want to go back there). There are some lovely things about babies and toddlers. Am looking forward to being a grandparent! Sounds like your annoyance is with the mother.

SirBoobAlot Mon 29-Nov-10 18:28:28

Well don't you sound like a ray of sunshine...

gregtheguineapig Mon 29-Nov-10 19:05:04


santasbluebaubles Mon 29-Nov-10 19:09:03 someone with a baby and a toddler YABU. If I were your friend and knew you felt like that, I wouldn't want to come back to your house.

laydeestardust Mon 29-Nov-10 19:55:29

I don't think people mean to be inconsiderate but some people lose perspective when they're in the babyandtoddlerzone grin

I remember telling OH what a complete cow my friend was when she asked me if I'd mind changing my most precious small ones' nappies in the bathroom rather than in the living room. shock

Imagine!! Expecting me to change precious 1 and 2 in the... the... the TOILET of all places!!! (I was a little mad with DC1 and DC2-I improved by DC4 lol)

She just had the one teenager by that point and mine were 6 months and 2 ish with very overactive bowels so it was a bit of a poofest!!!

Oh and by the way, it IS wonderful when they can finally get in the car unassisted grin

NinkyNonker Mon 29-Nov-10 20:03:59

What a charming tone. I'm sure your children were little delights. If I ever thought a 'friend' or mine thought this way about my DD I certainly wouldn't be coming back.

"the mother in question thought it OK for me to hold the baby for ages"...this is a tough one, as the mother of a 4 month old everyone is always on at me to hold long is too long? Take her back too quickly and I'm a possessive PFB-er...could you not have handed her back without being quite so mean?!

NinkyNonker Mon 29-Nov-10 20:04:33

Oh, but I always change DD in the bathroom, seems natural.

neverknowinglyunderdressed Mon 29-Nov-10 20:07:14

My twins are now 6 and can make their own breakfasts grin. I too am over babies, totally. Recently I was out with a childless girlfriend for brunch and a barmy mother of two small ones allowed her toddler to run around and yell and her baby to howl for what seemed like the entire meal. Some people just cant seem to think about anyone else.

mamsnet Mon 29-Nov-10 20:07:19

Didn't take you long to forget that your own offspring once pooed in their nappies.. and <shudder> So did you! hmm

ShanahansRevenge Mon 29-Nov-10 20:07:55

grin at "the crawling ones" they are icky bugs or something!

TattyDevine Mon 29-Nov-10 20:56:00

They so are though Shanas aren't they.

Mine crawls into the kitchen to forage for discarded food scraps. If I've done my obligatory brooming, she'll try the bin blush

Fernie3 Mon 29-Nov-10 21:02:22

Well yanbu to not want any more babies but i feel a bit sorry for your friend i hope she didnt realise how you were feeling!

I have never see a baby that has cradle cap that smelled before either i have see very. Fresh headed babies or you have an incredibly sensitive sense of smell..

FanjoKazooie Mon 29-Nov-10 21:08:01

I was ready to agree with you from the title of your post, but the tone of your post was very sour.

Bet your 'friend' couldn't wait to get away from you, no wonder they didn't hang around to clear up.

Guitargirl Mon 29-Nov-10 21:08:18

Charming. You were a baby once as were your own children. Is this how you're going to be when you have grandchildren - because you are 'over the baby bit'.

I am 'over the incredibly rude adults bit' but I still have to put up with them. That's life.

carocaro Mon 29-Nov-10 21:30:58

I think I was just astonished at the mess they created and the lack of thought to clear up the baby/toddler mess, or attempt to at least.

I'd made them lunch and given them some old clothes and helped one with her CV - and not even a thank you from either of them.

And beleive me the cradle cap did smell bad.

And one of them reversed into my emptied wheelie bin, knocked it over, but did not bother to get out the car to pick it up! My neighbour came over to tell me that he'd picked it up after she had whizzed off. I didn't here the bell as I had the bloody hoover on!

Having small children is no excuse for having no manners or common courtesy. I never once left someone's house in a shit tip; just rude.

So those who think IABU I will send them over to yours next because must love to be a dormat in this way.

GetOrfMoiLand Mon 29-Nov-10 21:37:22

I am with you caro.

I just can't be arsed with other people's naughty kids.

I could sit there and cuddle babies all the day long, but badly behaved kids of about 5 - 7 I could do without.

Just sit down and be quiet. No I am not going to entertain you. Read a book.

<mother of teenager. Thank christ>

smellmycheese Mon 29-Nov-10 21:59:35

wow, for a forum for PARENTS there's a helluva lotta baby haters on here! When you have a small baby, life is hard enough without other mums (who you'd think might understand) turning on you aswell.

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