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to think my mum shouldn't bollock me for running out of loo paper.

(96 Posts)
VivaLeBeaver Sat 27-Nov-10 15:21:56

We ran out of loo paper the other morning, not a problem I thought. I stopped at the shop on the way to work and brought it home with me. Noone was at home all day so nobody should have had a problem with this.

My mum just rang up screeching that she was near my house the other day and needed a crap so let herself into my house, had a crap and then had no loo paper. She's proper furious and just gave me a lecture on how I should always have a cupboard full of spare loo rolls and what a slattern I am for running out and I should be more organised. My house, my business. I politely pointed out it wasn't a problem for me and now she's in a right huff.

I can't believe she came round and had a crap in my loo. She's told me off for the bath been mucky as well. (cat was playing in the bath and left muddy paw prints).

At least now I know who left DD's bedroom door open and allowed the dog to get in there and shit on the rug sleep on her bed all day.

nameymcnamechange Sat 27-Nov-10 15:22:57

Sorry but pmsl grin.

PaisleyLeaf Sat 27-Nov-10 15:24:34


hee hee

Gissabreak Sat 27-Nov-10 15:24:43

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Psammead Sat 27-Nov-10 15:25:22

Change your locks.

Or... move.


colditz Sat 27-Nov-10 15:25:30

Did you say that to her?

"Ah - NOW I know who let the dog into your grand-daughter's bedroom to befoul her clean bed with toxoplasmic faeces - it was you, her so called grandmother!"

cherrybea Sat 27-Nov-10 15:27:42

I think I've read it all on MN and then I open another thread and something else makes me go shock.


Out of interest did she find anything to wipe with or did she walk like John Wayne all the way home.

petratsdontsmell Sat 27-Nov-10 15:28:12

(What does pmsl mean?)

How odd OP!! Do you think maybe your mum was feigning outrage at lack of loo paper in an attempt to be funny, but got the tone wrong so she sounded seriously outraged and got your back up?

After all, if I was her I would find it funny- stuck on someone else's toilet with nothing to wipe with!
It is clearly her own fault and YANBU.

diddl Sat 27-Nov-10 15:28:35

Tell her to carry tissue paper with her.

And she shouldn´t be crapping anywhere uninvited!

overmydeadbody Sat 27-Nov-10 15:30:22

Seriously? shock

Get your spare keys back from her. How rude.

Megglevache Sat 27-Nov-10 15:31:29

hehehe, brilliant. YANBU and to get her back I'd deffo hide all the loo rolls everytime you leave the house- make it a game with the dcs and replace with a solitary brillo pad next to the crapper- just in case she should get caught short again. grin

bran Sat 27-Nov-10 15:32:02

Change your locks. I would. <snigger>

FoundWanting Sat 27-Nov-10 15:33:03

You need to tell her that she is not a proper grandmother if she hasn't got a handbag full of tissues for just this sort of emergency.

Megatron Sat 27-Nov-10 15:33:11

Your mum sounds ace! I love the fact that your mum thinks it's OK to have a nose round your house, have a crap while she's there, then tell you off afterwards. I like the cut of her jib. YANBU by the way. smile

Gissabreak Sat 27-Nov-10 15:33:58

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herbietea Sat 27-Nov-10 15:36:16

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StealthPolarBear Sat 27-Nov-10 15:36:32

lol at "my house, my business"

that really is the crux of the matter, isn't it

magicmummy1 Sat 27-Nov-10 15:36:58

pmsl! I'm quite anal ('scuse the pun!) about having loo roll in the house but how on earth were you to know that your dm was going to pop in for an uninvited crap!

She needs to learn to wipe indian-style - with her hands! grin

GrimmaTheNome Sat 27-Nov-10 15:41:06

Has she not learned by her age 'always check for loo roll before you start' ?

I do always leave a box of tissues in the downstairs loo so there's a backup if a guest gets caught short in both senses.

SantasNutellaFairy Sat 27-Nov-10 15:44:29

I would definitely get your spare key back off her and only give it back if she looks after the house while you are away and other stuff whe actually needs it for.

The cheek of the woman- but I don't think she'll doi that again in a hurry!

VivaLeBeaver Sat 27-Nov-10 16:09:47

Maybe she did clock the lack of loo roll before she started and maybe it was actually her not the dog that crapped on the rug. confused

She says she had to go downstairs and get her handbag, find a scrap of tissue. Do the best she could but didn't have enough. She says she now has a sore bum and its my fault.

cherrybea Sat 27-Nov-10 16:11:21

Ha, a sore bum! MN has really made my day today

MardyBra Sat 27-Nov-10 16:12:49

Isn't that what kitchen roll is for?

VivaLeBeaver Sat 27-Nov-10 16:13:35

Ah, I'm out of kitchen roll as well. blush

Personally I'd have used a tea towel and then binned it!

mugggletoeandwine Sat 27-Nov-10 16:15:10

Surely you have that thing, oh what is it now, oh yes, water in your house and she could've washed her shitty arse?confused

I'd take her keys off her pronto.

Mind you, once my toilet was broken, so I had to use my friends and she came home with her Dad when I was in the middle of a big poo and playing on my Gameboy.
I had to hide the Gameboy and came downstairs very red facedblush
She had given me permission to use her loo though.

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