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to think my friend is ignorant/racist?

(21 Posts)
facebookfuckwittery Sat 27-Nov-10 09:11:24

And if I'm not BU, what shall I say to her??

Just noticed her facebook status was "Hewo ma faybook fwend.."
someone had replied huh?
and she said "just a pic of a chinky/jap I snapped on my phone lol"

I then noticed she had changed her profile pic to a close up of a elderly asian woman, looking a bit bemused at the camera.

What the fuck????? Why does she think this is remotely funny? Really want to say something to her, but what?! I can't just delete her off my facebook friends and forget about her, as I am seeing her next week and she is an avid user of fb, will definitely notice if not by next week probably soon afterwards and I will have to say something.....

Have namechanged in case she reads this (in which case I guess my problemn of saying anything would be solved!)

truffleshuffle Sat 27-Nov-10 09:13:54

YANBU. That offends me and I'm not asian/chinese/japanese.

SlartyBartFast Sat 27-Nov-10 09:22:44

plus she took a photo of an actual person??
how immature is she? let alone racist

StewieGriffinsMom Sat 27-Nov-10 09:23:02

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

onimolap Sat 27-Nov-10 09:28:51

I'd go for ignorant rather than racist (I bet she could just as easily have made offensive comments for non-race reasons).

Do you want her as a friend? Or to be associated with her in any way in cyberspace? No? Then it's pretty obvious what to do.

AnyFuleKno Sat 27-Nov-10 09:30:03

if you're seeing her next week is it in the capacity of a friendship? Or do you have some tie to her that you can't easily break?

If she's a friend I would get shot

facebookfuckwittery Sat 27-Nov-10 09:33:20

Yes I think she is actually ignorant rather than racist for the reasons onimolap mentioned. I think she will be surprised if I say to her that I think it racist.

Yes she took a photo of an actual person.

Yes I am seeing her next week as a friend, she is a longstanding friend and has always been very loyal to me so I would like to try and address what she has said rather than just getting rid. She does have a very juvenile sense of humour which I have never really found funny, but on other levels she is a good friend. She sends me shite emails from work all the time which I just delete without reading. What shall I say???

Cartoose Sat 27-Nov-10 09:34:11

YANBU. Horrible!

facebookfuckwittery Sat 27-Nov-10 09:36:02

OK what about saying this to her:

Why do you assume that she has any accent at all, and if she is not a native English speaker, I bet she speaks English better than you speak her native language! I would be careful as by posting her photo and what you have said, you could get in trouble for racist comments.

Would message her privately rather than on her wall.

facebookfuckwittery Sat 27-Nov-10 09:37:05

Oh and might also say, by the way I think the terms chinky/jap are also considered derogratory.

MaybeIShould Sat 27-Nov-10 09:42:55

I doubt anyone that thick will understand what you are trying to get over - it's just a larf innit!! shock

StewieGriffinsMom Sat 27-Nov-10 09:47:07

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

AnyFuleKno Sat 27-Nov-10 09:51:04

also really out of order to post a photo of someone on facebook without their knowledge or permission to take the piss out of it

She sounds very peurile

RealityIsMyOnlyDelusion Sat 27-Nov-10 09:52:41

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

peeringintothevoid Sat 27-Nov-10 09:53:29

YANBU! What a twat! shock

I couldn't be friends with someone who thought that was funny, personally, but if you want to maintain the friendship, I'd do as you and others have suggested and send her a PM.

facebookfuckwittery Sat 27-Nov-10 09:53:44

I know they are wishy washy! I know she will take serious offence if I am more direct.... sigh..... she is a twat but has been there for me in the past. Have just texted a mutual friend about it, maybe we could tackle her together.

LadyOfTheFlowers Sat 27-Nov-10 09:54:24

What a twunt she is. hmm
Hilarious.

fortyplus Sat 27-Nov-10 09:57:35

I would send her a private message to say you're rather surprised at her making comments which many people would find offensive. If she really is a good friend she'll heed your advice and remove them.

StewieGriffinsMom Sat 27-Nov-10 09:59:34

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

GeneHuntsMistress Sat 27-Nov-10 10:04:27

I'd put what SGM has written - it's concise and unequivocal, you will have stated your case and how your friend deals with that is then her prerogative.

NeverEatYellowTaintedSnow Sat 27-Nov-10 10:45:58

Ignorant and racist IMO. Not remotely funny. I would delete if she isn't a close friend, and if she is, I would PM her and explain why you're offended by that. If she dismisses you or gets at all narky, then I would delete her regardless.

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