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to think that if MIL feels so strongly about this she should've done it herself!

(10 Posts)
OracleInaCoracle Mon 22-Nov-10 11:50:19

My mil is very lovely and I like her a lot, but lately she seems to be a bit interfering and spends a lot of time bitching about my sil/getting uppity because she isnt being put first. eg, she was moaning because SIL's MIL looked after her DD overnight. apparently she hardly see's the kids. but neither does SIL's MIL (got that?)

anyway, I offered to make the christmas cakes this year, and SIL and I agreed that I would do it with my DS and her DD and DS. it was tradition in my family for all the DC's to help make the cake, have a stir and make a wish. my neice and nephew have had a busy few weekends but the fruit has been sitting in the brandy and cinnamon for about 6w now, so it smells great and will make a lovely cake, SIL and the kids are due to come round after school today. Ive woken up this morning with a stiff shoulder and my ribs are swollen (teitzes) Im just finishing a v traumatic period (which im certain wasnt a period iykwim) and saturday I had terrible stomach ache and diarrhoea.

Ive just spoken to MIL and said that I might put it off til later in the week or the weekend and she went nuts, told me that ive already left it too late and the cake wont be as nice. i explained that the important bit (soaking the fruit) was done and there are some people who make their cakes in the middle of december. what i really wanted to say was "fuck off and do it yourself then"

reading back, its a non-problem and i am being a little unreasonable, but Im trying to do a nice thing and having a run of shitty luck, she should be grateful I havent just bought an asda smartprice one for her instead!

kreecherlivesupstairs Mon 22-Nov-10 11:52:46

Of course YANBU. I think you are doing really well considering everything that's happened to you recently.
Bad luck with the 'non' period. Your MIL is a lucky (if jealous) woman. Tell her it could be so much worse, she could have me as a DIL!

ChaoticChristmasAngelCrackers Mon 22-Nov-10 11:57:49

YANBU

Your health is more important than a cake.

OracleInaCoracle Mon 22-Nov-10 11:59:56

thanks, I just really dont feel up to it. have taken tablets but i feel terrible and dont have energy to do the housework let alone cope with three overexcited kids!

Timeforanap Mon 22-Nov-10 12:10:14

Poor you, hope you feel better soon. Expect (hope) she feels guilty about takling to you like that by now.

BTW, that is a really lovely tradition, but it makes me feel tired just to think about it!

ConstanceFelicity Mon 22-Nov-10 12:12:32

Poor you. No matter if your cake is the best in the world, she won't like it now...
Hope you feel better soon x

OracleInaCoracle Mon 22-Nov-10 12:19:54

aother example, on friday I made some mince pies. my first ever batch. ds (who has always loathed them) promptly ate 6 in a row (and 5 more yesterday) declaring them "the best cakes you've ever made mummy" MIL asked for a couple which i took up. and all she said about them was "theyre alright, (FIL)'s mums were better though"

FIL's mum has been dead for 3 years, it'd be pretty damned hard to get a mince pie outr of her now. and she will moan about the cake, i know it. and the pudding. and probably the turkey.

<considers drinking brandy>

diddl Mon 22-Nov-10 12:38:59

If it´s such a problem for her I´d let her know that she´s more than welcome to fetch the ingredients & make her own.

Hope you´re feeling better soon, OP.

Ealingkate Mon 22-Nov-10 12:42:11

chin chin lissielow, it's after midday!!

OracleInaCoracle Mon 22-Nov-10 13:12:57

tbf she was snooty about ds's birthday cake too. I made it myself and she was very sniffy from the beginning and tried to persuade me to just buy one instead. id think that she didnt like my cooking, but she eats the bloody cakes/biscuits etc!

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