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AIBU?

OH changing jobs AGAIN

5 replies

sickoftheholidays · 18/11/2010 19:55

OH gave up a good job in IT project management the year we got married, as he decided that he wanted a change of career. So he retrained as a financial advisor and has been fully qualified for around 3 years now. Whilst he was training he was earning a shitty wage, and then to top it off, last year he was made redundant in May and finally managed to get another job this time self employed last November. The company very kindly paid him a modest allowance monthly and paid for his laptop which he has been paying back and he now only owes £270 ish which he should clear this month then anything he earns is ours if you see what I mean.
He has come home tonight and has announced that he wants to leave his current job and go work somewhere else (he has been offered a position at another company with better comission splits) but if he does that he will lose all of the business which is in the pipeline at his current employer and we will have to wait another few months before he is breaking even again.
In the mean time, I am working part time, and trying to build up my business sewing custom made pushchair and car seat stuff, but my "day" job is a lot of stress for very poor pay and I am seriously hacked off with it. I would like to tell them to eff off and build my own business working for myself doing something I really like doing.
AIBU to think its my turn now? every time he gets a half decent wage coming in, he decides hes bored of that job or he wants to work somewhere else, and every time I get put to the back of the queue stuck in a shit job I hate as we cant afford for me to take a pay cut while I retrain or build up my own business.

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HecateQueenOfWitches · 18/11/2010 20:00

Tell him that. "You are being selfish. every time you get a half decent wage coming in, you decide you're bored of that job or you want to work somewhere else, and every time I get put to the back of the queue stuck in a shit job I hate as we cant afford for me to take a pay cut while I retrain or build up my own business."

Of course it's a partnership and you each take turns supporting the other and being the one bringing the money in as part of this support - but there comes a point when it's taking the piss! How long should one person carry all the financial burden while the other pisses about, able to do so because their partner is in the real world, doing something tey probably hate, because SOMEONE has to be the grown up. Families don't live on fresh air!

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Onetoomanycornettos · 18/11/2010 20:02

Not an ok decision, but I would try to find out more about why he wants to leave if there's commission and so on in the pipeline. Perhaps he knows something you don't (like there isn't much in that pipeline). Otherwise, it sounds unreasonable and he needs to bring in a wage.

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ChippingIn · 18/11/2010 20:02

What Hecate said!

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traceybath · 18/11/2010 20:02

Hecate as always speaks wise words.

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sickoftheholidays · 18/11/2010 20:20

thankyou ladies. I was feeling like a 5yo saying its not fair its my turn now, but its my life and happiness at stake here.

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