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AIBU?

in not letting my 3 year old daughter poo outside!

25 replies

Nando95 · 16/11/2010 15:14

Hi all sorry to talk poo but I have recently been criticised by my friend for making my 3 year old wait less than 5 minutes to go to toliet(number 2)in a nearby cafe rather than let her poo near a public park.
She was getting desperate but she did manage to wait until we got to the loo without too much fuss and she has been toliet trained for a year now so can hold it a bit longer. The thing is I was told I was a prude and mean for not letting her go there and then but in all but extreme cases I just dont agree with allowing children to poo outside at will.
Later on my friend allowed her daughter to poo in a field less than 5 minutes from home and her child did not seem at all desperate.
Am I right in thinking that if a fully potty trained child can wait or if you are really near home then you should encourage them to go there and not outside or am I being a ''prude'' Thanks

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sweetheart · 16/11/2010 15:17

I think it's ok in a desperate situation but if they can wait they should wait.

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DooinMeCleanin · 16/11/2010 15:18

I hope your friend carries poop bags for her child? I have to carry them for my dog, so she should have to for her dd Grin

YANBU. I can understand allowing them to wee (if they are really desperate and hopping up and down with discomfort), but no to pooing. Yuck.

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MoralDefective · 16/11/2010 15:19

You are right and your friend is wrong.
Bizarre,how are they supposed to learn.
There was a thread on here yesterday about peolpe peeing and POOING is shop changing rooms,and leaving soiled sanitary stuff behind aswell.
One customer,when told there were no loos but told where there were some(not far)actually told her child to pee on the floor as the assistant was being a bitch!

You are not being a prude.

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SweetnessAndShite · 16/11/2010 15:20

Agree with Dooin

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StealthPomBear · 16/11/2010 15:21

I would do it in an absolute dire emergency but at the moment Id more than likely have a nappy for DD that DS could use anyway
Wouldn't encourage it, certainly

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saffy85 · 16/11/2010 15:25

I'd have made my DD (3) wait if it was only 5 minutes walk but only because ime it's easier to hold in a poo than a wee. If DD is dying for a wee and it's clear we would never make it in time, yes I have been known to find a quiet corner in the park and let her wee there, out of sight of anyone else. I think it's good to encourage them to hold it in for an extra 5 minutes rather than let them go anytime anywhere, otherwise what's the point in ditching nappies?

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Nando95 · 16/11/2010 15:28

I dont mind wees so much and I havent got any issues with children who are genuinally desperate or have stomach troubles but just dont feel that childen should be made to feel that it is acceptable for them to have a poo wherever they want.

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jonesy71 · 16/11/2010 15:28

I thought just what Dooin said about the poop bags !

If a child cannot wait a few minutes to get somewhere civilised to do a poo then they are not entirely toilet trained imo.

You know your child and you were right to make her wait and your friend needs to keep her beaky out.

Personally I hate to see any outside toileting and I'm not a prude I'd just rather not have to see it.

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GetOrfMoiLand · 16/11/2010 15:29

Your friend is mad. I DO hope that she picked the poo up afterwards, if not then she is a complete disgrace.

Yes, at that age they can wait until they get home.

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Nando95 · 16/11/2010 15:31

The poo was picked up afterwards and put in a doggy doo bin! x

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Nagoo · 16/11/2010 15:32

My DS is 3 and i'd be mortified if I had to let him poo outside.

I realise that accidents can happen, but as a matter of course it seems a bit unnecessary!

I think your friend is a bit odd if it is only 5 mins to the toilet. And I really hope she picks up after her children!

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Rosebud05 · 16/11/2010 15:33

This happened to us once in the middle of the woods and fortunately I did had a couple of those nappy bags to pick it up with!

YANBU. I really don't mind a bit of alfresco weeing but pooing is a bit different1

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emptyshell · 16/11/2010 15:43

I did have a fleeting moment where I thought... "under the table in Pizza Hut" in response to the title (anyone who remembers PizzaHutPottyGate will know what I mean).

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Nando95 · 16/11/2010 15:44

I have read that post too no mine is mainly about alfresco poos!! x

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Rockbird · 16/11/2010 15:45

If the poo was actually poking out of her bottom (sorry) then I would let DD poo outside, otherwise not a chance. Why would you encourage something like that and at what age does it become unasseptible if you do allow it.

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Nando95 · 16/11/2010 15:47

Thats mainly my point if you dont encourage them to wait awhile then they arent going to learn to wait at all and what age do you finally stop them doing it- 4,5,6,7, or older!!

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Debs3013 · 16/11/2010 15:56

I'm sorry I have nothing sensible to add to this discussion but my boss is giving me very stern looks across the desk because I am p*ssing (not poo'ing) myself laughing!

I had never considered the option of poo bags for kids as well as dogs :o

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Indith · 16/11/2010 15:56

Ds did a poo outside once less than a min walk from our house. He said he needed a wee, he was unable to hold on at the time (issues, lots of issues with wee) so he did a wee in the grass then suddenly announced he was doing a poo and out it plopped Blush thankfully I had a nappy bag and I popped it in the dog bin.

Generally though I make them wait Grin even when dd was just potty training recently and I carted a potty around everywhere I still took her to a loo to use it.

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Nando95 · 17/11/2010 10:29

I am glad everyone agrees with me as I was made to feel like I was in he wrong!

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pastyeater · 17/11/2010 11:59

Ok if she was desperate and couldn't wait. Otherwise they need to learn what's appropriate. So YANBU.

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begonyabampot · 17/11/2010 12:51

you weren't wrong but my Ds's have poohed outside quite a few times as they insist that they can't wait and there have been no toilets nearby but I always pick it up and bin it. Some kids (maybe more a boy thing) really find it hard to wait.

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BigWelt · 17/11/2010 12:55

Oh God if only I could go for a poo in the park things would be so much better

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rockinhippy · 17/11/2010 12:59

YDNBU, & your friend IS BUHmm

I remember a girl at DDs nursery whose family thought it "cute" that their own DD would do this regularly & they also saw no harm in letting her Hmm

Same girl is now constantly in trouble at School, because she thinks rules are for everyone else, not her, probably a bit mad, but I've often wondered if there was a link Confused

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pigletmania · 17/11/2010 13:14

Yanbu your friend however is being vvvvvvu, yuck. Hope she carries poo bags of it's a regular occurrence as she is breaking the law. Dirty mere. Ok if her dd was virtually touching cloth than fine, but if she is not desperate.

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FreudianSlimmery · 17/11/2010 13:23

Ick, YANBU, you knew your DD could wait. My DD has occasionally said she really needs to wee but when offered the chance to do it hidden by a tree she looked mortified (like me, i never would do this as a kid) and managed to wait til we got home.

Pottette plus is great, I take it if I know we will be far from a loo for a long time, nature walks etc, but generally DD can wait.

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