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to invite complete strangers to DD's party?

(19 Posts)
Tortoiseonthehalfshell Mon 08-Nov-10 12:05:14

She is turning two, and she has a BFF at daycare who is within a few days of the same age. Mine runs into the place in the morning excitedly repeating her name, and when I ask what she did that day she talks about her again, and tells me how they played chase together.

Now I know she's only two. But it would be nice for her, and frankly hardly anyone else is coming.

So, would it be totally awkard to put an invite in these girls' pigeonholes saying Hi, you don't know us, but my daughter totally adores your daughter, please come to ours? Would that be weird? I am totally overthinking this, but I am new to small child party etiquette. Yes? No?

sue52 Mon 08-Nov-10 12:08:58

YANBU. That's how you broaden you and your child's circle of friends.

andagain Mon 08-Nov-10 12:10:22

I don't think it's weird at all, I did the same for my DD's third birthday.
I asked her who she wanted to invite to her party and she gave me three kids' names from her nursery (I had no idea who they were). I asked several times just to make sure (as they get a new "best friend" all the time at that age) and she always gave me the same three names so I invited them to her party.

ruddynorah Mon 08-Nov-10 12:10:57

Yes course it's fine. The parent will stay at the party too, so it isn't like they're leaving her with strangers.

CMOTdibbler Mon 08-Nov-10 12:11:03

You just put a party invitation in their pigeon holes. DS wouldn't have had anyone to his birthday parties unless we did that

ramblingmum Mon 08-Nov-10 12:11:51

YANBU inviting her freinds to her party sounds great

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Mon 08-Nov-10 12:15:37

ruddy, that's sort of why I'm overthinking it, though - if they were older, and it was a drop-and-run, fine. But would you feel it odd if your child got invited to a party hosted by complete strangers, and you were going to be expected to turn up and actually stay? Because I think I'd run a mile!

alicet Mon 08-Nov-10 12:16:55

Agree with everyone else that this is totally reasonable and normal!

I have done this for playdates too for children that my dc repeatedly talk about so def NBU for a party

alicet Mon 08-Nov-10 12:18:23

tortoise cross posted...

Still NBU. If the parents don't want to come to a strangers house they can always decline the invite can't they? Still doesn't make you wierd and you are definately overthinking it!!!

I have made some really good friends myself through doing this.

ruddynorah Mon 08-Nov-10 12:19:46

Honestly it's fine. When they arrive you say hi there are some others here from nursery let me introduce you etc.. It's nice to meet the kids yours spend time with. Easy to chat about nursery, then where you work blah blah. Not awkward.

Then you'll be invited to their parties and you already know each other.

thumbwitch Mon 08-Nov-10 12:20:07

But they might see it as a good opportunity to broaden their DDs' circles and their own at the same time, tortoise - you shouldn't really project your own feelings onto others.

If it were me, and I got a note like that, and my DD (or in my case, DS) knew who the party girl was, I'd make the effort to go to the party. You never know when you might meet a new friend, after all - or it could be fairly tedious - but it's only a couple of hours.

mousymouse Mon 08-Nov-10 12:22:51

did the same for ds, invited the friends from his nursery he actually likes and plays with even though I have never met the parents.
after all it is his party, not mine.

redfairy Mon 08-Nov-10 12:23:41

I found the nursery staff invaluable in guiding me who to invite to my daughters party as they could see who she did and didn't interact with. Why don't you ask them? i'm sure they'll be delighted to help

piscesmoon Mon 08-Nov-10 12:27:37

Of course it is fine. It is her party-I can never understand parents inviting the whole class when they don't play with most of them. Her party-makes sense to have her choice.

Tortoiseonthehalfshell Mon 08-Nov-10 12:29:53

Ok, good, thanks. I sometimes need more than my husband to tell me I'm being stressy and stupid.

I wasn't going to invite the whole class, pisces; she's two, so mostly it's my friends with similarly-aged children, or my friends without children who are going to come and drink our wine bulk out the numbers. She's only just at the stage of caring about individual children recently.

MumNWLondon Mon 08-Nov-10 13:42:00

Its fine, nice for your DD to have her friend there, just put invite in pigeon hole, the parents will stay at that age. No need to say "you don't know me on invite" no doubt their DD talks about yours as well!

piscesmoon Mon 08-Nov-10 13:44:10

You will need the parent to stay-I made quite a few friends through my DCs and we have remained friends despite DCs going their separate ways.

KERALA1 Mon 08-Nov-10 13:53:37

Just dont do what my friend did and ask the nursery teacher to hand out invites to "friends" her 3 year old talked about only to find they were all imaginary grin. My friend had thought the names were a little odd.

FindingMyMojo Mon 08-Nov-10 14:00:08

oh crap - we slept in this morning (iphone went flat)& you've just reminded me I forgot to send DD to CM's with the birthday party invites for her drop-in friends we don't know (but DD & CM do).
Hope tomorrow won't be too late.

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