Advanced search

Mumsnet has not checked the qualifications of anyone posting here. If you have any medical concerns we suggest you consult your GP.

Let's have an allregy giggle for once, I am allergic to calamine, come, singger, and share please

(55 Posts)
BlueBumedFly Fri 23-Oct-09 10:26:01

So, as some light relief from all of our allergy stresses with our LOs, I thought I would share my funny allergy.

I am allergic to calamine, of any sort, cream or lotion. It's ok to snigger, it is a comedy allergy.

Go back 25 years to when I had Chicken Pox, picture my mother standing me up and practically bathing me in the evil pink liquid, she turns away to get more cotton wool, she turns back and I have gone. She looks down and I am out cold on the floor.

Move ahead 15 years, I am now in the USA, a scuba diving instructor, young, free and obviously invincible and immortal. I get heat rash from some sun lotion (pattern is now emerging) so I buy some calamine thinking it was just a childhood thing or a figment of my poor mother's imagination. Wake up flat on my back on the apartment floor with the bottle of evil pink liquid smashed next to me and a rather large bump on my head from where it hit the coffee table on the way down!

Move ahead to another life when I have a marriage, mortgage and kids. DD now has chicken pox and they now sell the new aqueous calamine cream... surely that is not evil too?

Picture the scene, trying to dab cream on a hot, irritable crying toddler whilst fighting the urge to pass out cold, I get closer and closer to the ground trying to quell the 'whirlies. I am crouched with my head on the lovely cold bathroom floor whilst pathetically holding up a wad cotton wool covered in evil pink cream in the hope I will manage to get a dab onto DD as she runs past every now and then.

It's OK, snigger away. Anyone else have comedy allergies? Come and chat, two days of Peppa Pig, Charlie and Lola, and ITNG are driving me slightly mad. Please come before Barney finishes me off!

BlueBumedFly Fri 23-Oct-09 20:30:00

Guys??? Someone must have a comedy allergy? It cannot just be me???

tinytalker Fri 23-Oct-09 20:33:39

That is quite an impressive and unusual allergy, I think you win the prize
I'm allergic to housework and at the moment my rather annoying hubby! Does that count?

BlueBumedFly Fri 23-Oct-09 20:35:41

Oh yes TinyT, housework is a known allergy, and ironing I am told. Nasty, keep away at all costs!!

foxinsocks Fri 23-Oct-09 20:36:05

lol bbf

I am allergic to hyacinths blush

just a hint of the smell and I am out cold

went to a friend's house and she said 'I've found these wonderful flowers! They are so easy to grow. I have them in pots everywhere. They are so colour...' and that's all I remember her saying


anothercoldcupoftea Fri 23-Oct-09 20:37:21

Nope, can't top that grin

My brother is allergic to anything coloured green though. Couldn't sit on grass as a child, and still can't eat lettuce. Wierd.

strawberrycornetto Fri 23-Oct-09 20:39:27

I am allergic to the cold. Everyone laughs at me but its true.

I come out in hives which are extremely itchy and painful, generally on my arms, legs, hands, feet. It comes up in a breeze, even on a tropical day, in the supermarket, in a swimming pool, in the rain.... It makes my life a misery, especially the swimming pool thing cause I love swimming and really struggle with most pools, especially in holiday villas.

I get no sympathy from family or friends, just ridicule!

Geocentric Fri 23-Oct-09 20:42:36

You know the Disney film Hunchback of Notre Dame? The face on that guy is what I look like if I take aspirin, advil... anything but paracetamol. No other reaction, just hideously weird looking for about 24 hours. Soooo sexy! (not!)

Oooh, black pepper. Makes me high as a kite. No need for drugs, just give me a perfectly legal bowl of goulash.

MmeGoblindt Fri 23-Oct-09 20:45:30

DH has a strange allergy to being cold, paticularly after hair washing. He sneezes for 30 minutes. Same when he gets chilly when sitting outside too long in evening.

Can't top the calamine allergy though. Very impressive

BlueBumedFly Fri 23-Oct-09 20:45:43

Hee Hee, excellent, its kicked off, this is soooo funny, keep them coming smile

BlueBumedFly Fri 23-Oct-09 20:49:36

Sorry, not funny, just unusual .... heee heee, glad I am not the only 'special' person!!

Chulita Fri 23-Oct-09 20:52:48

Not me, a friend, is allergic to alcohol. She has a sneezing fit the moment she has the tiniest drink - unfortunately she loves her WKD so we have some stupid sneezing/giggling drunken moments grin

RubyBooBerry Fri 23-Oct-09 20:52:57

You're allergic to come????????????????????????????

Chulita Fri 23-Oct-09 20:54:01

pmsl RBB, I thawt the same thing!

Geocentric Fri 23-Oct-09 20:54:59

Took me a while to figure out what RubyBoo was on about... grin

RubyBooBerry Fri 23-Oct-09 20:57:57

LOL - I saw it and thought "naaaa, can't be!" grin

clayre Fri 23-Oct-09 20:58:51

My dad has an allergy to piriton, he got was covered in an itchy rash went to the dr who said to get piriton to relive it so took one dose of piriton and ended up covered in itchy hives, was then sent to hosp to find out what was making him and test him allergies, he has to avoid piriton now

stainesmassif Fri 23-Oct-09 21:01:46

you're right, your comedy allergy is funny, but i suspect it's too funny, no one can compete!

i don't have any funny allergy stories.

if you start a comedy thread about finding toilets in a hurry, i'm your woman.

foxinsocks Fri 23-Oct-09 21:03:22

lol clayre

TrickOrTreatersDragOnTheNoose Fri 23-Oct-09 21:04:46

thank god someone else thought the OP was allergic to come...

Cokie Fri 23-Oct-09 21:08:19

I think I am allergic to come too!

FromGirders Fri 23-Oct-09 21:13:03

How do you wake up from a faint if you are
a - in a house of hyacinths
b - passed out on the floor with a mashed bottle of calamine next to you?
Don't you just keep re-fainting? [puzzled]

Kerrymumbles Fri 23-Oct-09 21:13:47

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

BlueBumedFly Fri 23-Oct-09 21:22:40

Ah, I see, errrrr, no, not come ...... Just calamine ....

foxinsocks Sat 24-Oct-09 07:51:31

well that's the unfunny bit really girders

I normally wake up then vomit (great house guest me) and by that stage can stumble outside for air before anything worse happens (breathing problems etc.!)

Join the discussion

Registering is free, easy, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Register now »

Already registered? Log in with: