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At wits end with people contaminating DS, first holiday club now school....

(20 Posts)
wangle99 Fri 04-Sep-09 19:18:36

DS been back at school 2 days, today were doing something about Mad Hatter's tea party, letter came home yesterday but never mentioned food (usually they ask for contributions towards it!).

DS comes home today with a letter from his teacher apologising he had a biscuit and that 'most of the food he ate was wheat/gluten free'. She said she didn't know he had additional dietary needs.

This is a new class than last year. However, last year many times he was glutened in the previous class.

Am I being naive in expecting the school to notify the teacher what children have allergies in the class - especially when they've just gone into the new class. Should I have gone in and spoken to the teacher?

DS used to be at independent school nursery and it was dealt with SO differently with no mistakes EVER I'm really not sure what I'm meant to be doing here but I am so cross. Two glutening episodes in two weeks and we were doing so well. I could cry sad

Thank you

AllotmentMum Fri 04-Sep-09 19:22:53

Yes, go and talk to the teacher. Many kids allergies are actually dislikes, so make sure she/he understand's your childs needs.

noodlesoup Fri 04-Sep-09 19:36:15

Does he not have a care plan?

wangle99 Fri 04-Sep-09 19:56:12

Nope. School not been that great and I don't know what to expect or what they should be doing.

I wrote to them before he started stating my worries, the headteacher wrote back and said 'medical notes had been made but could I keep reminding his teacher in case she forgets'.

DS ate a rich tea with icing on and a sponge cake with icing on (and then went to visit an aunt and messed himself as couldn't get to the toilet quick enough sad) Am SO cross.

DS is 5 by the way.

MIAonline Fri 04-Sep-09 20:14:16

I read your other thread and was surprised at the club being so lax with their procedures. The school also sound like they are not meeting their requirements.

Most good schools will have a medical plan for each child. There should be a list of children with medical and specific needs such as allergies. the teacher should know that a child in her class has allergies and I am surprised they didn't check before giving any food.

However, what I would say is that a letter went out telling you that there was going to be a tea party and I do think it was also your responsibility to check what was going to be consumed. These letters are a way of alerting parents, who can then check any specifics with the class teacher.

You need to speak to the SEN coordinatot (who will probably have responsibilty for medical/care plans) and also the Head to see what can be done and to complain, but also you do need to be more proactive yourself in preventing another occurance.

wangle99 Fri 04-Sep-09 20:15:37

I realise now I should have realised a tea party would have food but the school have never done anything like this without asking for a contribution from parents which is why I didn't really think.

The school don't seem to have a clue tbh I will make an appointment to go and see the headteacher and teacher.

noodlesoup Fri 04-Sep-09 20:17:28

At our school all dcs who have a medical need have a care plan with their photo on and what their problem is and what action needs to be taken if something happens. There is a copy in the front of every register, on the wall of the childs classroom, on the staff room notice board and in the kitchen. It gets updated/reviewed every year.

Do you know what is in place for other dcs with allergies etc.?

misdee Fri 04-Sep-09 20:18:30

does your ds know about his allergies and what he can and cant eat?

Smithagain Fri 04-Sep-09 20:23:16

At our school, notes about allergies etc are passed on to the new class teacher. In fact DD1's new teacher practially pounced on me yesterday morning (first day back) and demanded her epipen before she took DD into class.

But I do also make a point of writing a letter to update the class teacher each year. Partly because DD's needs are changing (she doesn't actually have an epipen any more following blood tests), and partly because the beginning of term is chaos, teachers are only just getting back into gear themselves and the climate is ripe for mistakes to be made.

I think you were lucky with the nursery school being so good and maybe will need to be more assertive and on their case now? So sorry you've had another episode - your poor little boy.

Smithagain Fri 04-Sep-09 20:24:40

... and Misdee has a point. If the school are going to be rubbish, your DS definitely needs to learn to say "is this OK for me to eat", like a broken record until someone listens :-(

lockets Fri 04-Sep-09 20:29:17

Message withdrawn

tinytalker Fri 04-Sep-09 20:54:10

I ended up writing my own care plan as the school were so clueless. They were actually relieved and I feel comfortable that I have presented them with the correct information in writing rather than relying on teachers passing the information on.
Why not do your own, with ds's photo on and make a point of getting the class teacher to stick it to the wall whilst you are there and then go to the welfare and staff room and do the same. It's better to be proactive and present it to the school as doing them a favour as you know they are so busy. They are sure to be pleased.

Try this as a template

wangle99 Fri 04-Sep-09 21:08:15

Thank you for all suggestions I will definately do a care plan for them.

DS is very good normally but I think it was just too much and the cake and biscuits looked TOO nice lol I think when he messed himself he wished he hadn't eaten it.

In his reception class there was a scribbled note on the wall that had the childs name and what they couldn't have - think there were four children on it last year.

I think I was definately spoilt at the nursery!

wangle99 Fri 04-Sep-09 21:43:38

In answer to Misdee he DOES know what he can't eat and will recite quite happily I can't have wheat or gluten lol However, he is very impressionable at the moment and will trust anyone who tells him something is ok to eat - I'm guessing he probably asked one of his 5 year old friends 'has this got wheat in it' they probably said no and he ate it.

Going to have to get through to him only grown ups (and his big siter) can tell him whether something has wheat/gluten in it or not.

noodlesoup Fri 04-Sep-09 22:05:26

My ds has the same problem. He is always saying 'X says I can have it' when X is a 3yo or a dog or something. He has just about got it that he has to check with an adult now. You will have the added problem of people thinking that you are being faddy or precious. Ds's allergy is peanuts which people take uber seriously. Nobody tells you 'a little bit won't hurt' with a nut allergy.

Smithagain Fri 04-Sep-09 22:09:25

Doing your own care plan sounds like a great idea. And make it look very important and impressive!

Do work on his ability to say no to food unless a grown-up says it's OK. I know he seems so little at 5, but he really needs to be the one that is able to say "no". It's hard to hand over to them, but it can be done. DD1 learned to refuse even quite yummy food at a similar age (and now, at 7yo, is still in the habit of asking if it's OK for her to eat things, even though she's had blood tests that indicate that she's now OK!)

Weta Sun 06-Sep-09 21:43:26

I've always asked to speak to the teacher myself in the first few days of the year, and made sure they understand the exact consequences of a mistake (so they know how serious it is).

Our is a serious dairy allergy so I guess the consequences are worse (anaphylaxis) but we basically tell him only to have food we provide as even other adults may not really know whether food has dairy in it.

The teacher this year has asked to provide a packet of safe cakes that he can be given if the others are having a treat or someone brings in a birthday cake or whatever. We bought his favourite ones, which are individually wrapped so no storage problems, and he'll be happy to have those instead.

Good luck- it's horrible having to trust other people to look after them...

PeedOffWithNits Fri 11-Sep-09 19:46:43

that is outrageous, OP, i would be headed straight for the heads office

My Dd is coeliac and the school are EXCELLENT about it, finding substitutes, asking for biscuits etc to be sent in.

it seems like they do not understand CD, put everything in detail to the class teacher, copied to headteacher

wangle99 Sat 12-Sep-09 21:17:25

Just to update you all...

Sent letter in and care plan that I had drawn up.

Had comprehensive apology from the school, it appears they tell the teachers BEFORE the summer holidays what children have issues and they expect them to remember in September. Policy has been changed now and they are also keeping information in the front of the school register.

This all seems fab BUT DS has had continual diarrhoea since school went back and am not sure whether it is due to the cake/biscuit incident or something happening on a daily basis. DS swears he doesn't eat anything he shouldn't do/swap food with mates at lunchtime etc but I cannot work out what is doing it sad

Thanks for your advice though felt quite strong about the letter and plan and felt the school realised I was being serious for once.

tatt Sat 12-Sep-09 22:01:54

my child has a nut allergy - so I supplied the teacher with a "treat box". this contained safe foods that could be given if the other children were having a treat. Could you not supply some of the gluten free bars they have in Sainbury or a packet of gluten free biscuits? Then they don't miss out completely and are less likely to be tempted.

I'm afraid you do need to remind people / teach your child to refuse food if in doubt. You could also consider using digestive enzymes to provide some protection against accidental exposure.

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