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I am feeling so guilty, have I given DD an allergy? V V stressed...

(8 Posts)
fustilarian Thu 24-Jul-08 22:42:00

My DD seems to be such a healthy baby, but is there a nightmare allergy just under the surface?

I feel like I am blowing it all out of proportion but I just can't stop imagining anaphylactic scenarios etc... am feeling very stressed that it is all my fault. I have visions of her in the future not being able to go out to restaurants, round to friends etc....

Basically, we have some allergy history but not loads in the family. I was very careful initially, just BF until 6 months, then slow weaning. Still BFing at 9 months and hoping to continue.

She has had no health probs so far (v lucky I know) she is big and robust, only one cold so far, no skin probs, breathing, feeding or anything problems really.

Then the HV suggested that I should try her on some dairy. I put a tiny bit of cheese and yoghurt into her meal, and bam, a rash all over her neck and ear. I tried a tiny bit of yoghurt again the week later and again, a small hives rash that lasted about half an hour, then it was gone.

Since then I have been ultra careful and am avoiding all allergenic foods completely until we get a referral to an allergy clinic.

Am I getting things really out of proportion? My DH reckons its just a really minor reaction and she will grow out of it soon, but I seem to be developing a really irrational fear of allergic reactions now, and have convinced myself that she will have a life of severe food allergies....

Every time I see even the slightest red patch on her skin my heart starts racing. I have cried about this one rash about 15 times!

I know I am coming across as a lunatic, but I am really quite sane in all other areas of mothering. Its just the allergy phobia.

But to return to my initial question, if I had held off on the dairy until she was 1 or 2, could I have saved her from allergy, and by giving her that yoghurt, has her immune system labelled dairy as poison for ever?

wrinklytum Thu 24-Jul-08 22:43:55

Stop stressing,if she is allergic,shes allergic-nothing you have done xxxxx

singyswife Thu 24-Jul-08 22:44:24

IMO this owuldnt have made any difference. Some kids just have things like this. My dd used to get a hive like rash that lasted about an hour on her face if she ate anything with egg in it but she grew out of it. Dont worry your dc will be fine.

cocolepew Thu 24-Jul-08 22:45:35

My DD had a dairy allergy when a baby, it gave her extreme stomache pains and reflux. She is fine with it now, though I do limit it. Now it just makes her snotty. Try not to worry, you didn't cause it. Good luck.

Granny22 Thu 24-Jul-08 23:14:40

I can have milk, butter, cream but have an intolerence of cheese, yoghurt, sour cream, etc. I understand that the reaction is to the bacteria that 'turn' the milk into cheese. However, it is hardly life threatening nor has it turned my life into a food nightmare. I can usually spot and avoid anything cheesy a mile off because it smells so bad to me. In the last say 10 years I have only been caught out once ( A Tesco Danish Pastry which was topped with cream cheese instead of icing - why????) and was sick as a puggy and then 'the runs' for a week.

I do cook with cheese and feed yoghurt to my grandchildren and interestingly can develop a short lived skin rash on my hands if I touch these foods. At my DGS's 1st Birthday Party one of hs little friends developed a rash aroung her mouth after eating a yoghurty smoothie and her mum explained that it did not seem to upset her digestion but she did seem to break out in a rash if yoghurt touched her skin.

You say that your DD has been really healthy so far and I wonder if that is why you are so upset as this is the first time you have seen her not 100% OK? Anyway, DONT PANIC. 1) It may not be a food allergy. 2) If it is she may well grow out of it. 3) If (and it is a big IF) she should prove to have a lifelong allergy it is not the end of the world. You, and your daughter, will soon learn what foods to avoid.

Sunflower100 Fri 25-Jul-08 09:08:32

Its only natural to feel upset as you are obviously a lovely mummy trying to do the best for your child. But mostly allergies are genetic and wrinklytum is right its nothing you have done. The allergy specialist my dd sees really sees no merit in waiting to introduce foods after 6 months ....so its all very confusing and unclear anyway.
Even if your child does have an allergy comparatively few have anaphylactic reactions- but of course these are the ones you hear about.
I totally understand you feeling teary and terrified! I did too when my dd started with various food allergies! But honestly if your dd does turn out to have an allergy you will be surpised how you just get into the habit of dealing it. Of course there are ups and downs along the way but she can still be a healthy robust happy child just with an allergy. And there are plenty of others in the same boat if that helps at all.
I think you are doing the right thing waiting to see a specialist before doing giving dairy again not least because you need some support and guidance - and allergies are a bit unpredictable.
Good luck - I hope you get some help! But no more blaming yourself. You sound like you have done all the right things anyway!!

wb Fri 25-Jul-08 09:22:25

You poor love.

Of course you shouldn't blame yourself. Allergies just happen. You would have to have tried her on dairy at some point and at least now you know. Ds1 had a reaction to ice cream as a baby - hives all over face.

I was quite shocked that hives were counted as a 'mild' reaction, they look so frightening. Ds also vomited but his allergy never got worse and he is now growing out of his dairy allergy age 2.5.

Having said all this I do know what you mean about allergy phobia. I found weaning ds1 very difficult after his dairy reaction and once had mild hysterics when he 'reacted' to a ham sandwich. Later I discovered that all babies turn bright red, spit and scream if they bite into a jalapeno pepper that you loving but distracted dh has included in the filling blush Am now weaning ds2 (v. cautiously) and spend ages scrutinizing his skin for rashes, spots, dry bits, incipient eczema etc and listening for wheezes, snuffles also. It is irrational, but I have this deep fear of allergies in my kids which is strange seeing as I am allergic to lots of things myself and had countless food allergies as a child, all of which I took in my stride quite happily.

aDad Fri 25-Jul-08 09:37:10

Don't beat yourself up. Really! It's not too young to have tried them on dairy. Dairy allergy is extremely common and is often transient anyway, as I am sure you know.

And if they are allergic, it really isn't the end of the world, you obviously do have to adjust diet accordingly and be vigilant but it becomes second nature to you, and your children will not care about 'being different' or anything. I have two very happy allergic children myself.

Good luck with weaning!

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