Looking into adoption

[MeadowHay]

I know hardly anything about adoption at all. Where would be a good start/place to go/resources etc to look into adoption and learn more about it?

We currently have one DC (16m). We are thinking about trying for another in about a year. We definitely want one or more other children. Pregnancy and birth were awful for me and to be honest so was most of the first 7 months or so of looking after a baby. The older DC gets the easier I find parenting and the more enjoyable. I know there are lots of children who need a home through adoption and that those children tend not to be newborn babies. I'm also an ethnic minority and I know that ethnic minority children are harder to place.

Really sorry if you read the above and think it sounds pathetic and not a proper motivation for adoption, I am all ears if I've said anything stupid please pull me up on it. I am not for one second going to pretend I know hardly anything about adoption as I definitely don't so this is really just if people can signpost me to to places/resources to look into it more.

I'm also aware that I am autistic and have an anxiety disorder and have had more significant mental health problems in the past. And definitely struggled with the baby stage. Would that rule me out anyway?

[Ted27]

First of all there are no stupid questions about adoption and secondly people have many different motivations.

Its important in adoption that you are really honest about your capabilities so identifying your struggles with babyhood is a really postive thing. It will impact on when you can adopt though as you usually need to have at least two years between any existing child and an adopted child. So if you are looking for a toddler, then your existing child will need to be at least 4.

Being autistic and having some mental health issues does not automatically rule you out but its something the social workers would explore with you. Again its an area where total honesty with yourself is needed about what triggers you, what you can cope with, what your support is like is you are having a bad day.
I'm not very good at identifying specific resources, but the area you need to be looking at initially are attachment, developmental trauma and delay, FAS