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Do SWs truly believe they are Time Lords?

(91 Posts)
ChoccyJules Wed 05-Apr-17 19:09:16

I can't give details and am not going to drip feed but BLOODY HELL there are some entitled people out there and we can do and say nothing, as usual. Send cake. Booze. Kittens.

OP’s posts: |
luckylucky24 Wed 05-Apr-17 19:30:37

cake wine

crispandcheesesandwichplease Wed 05-Apr-17 19:30:42

You're going to have to give us more info than that chocky!

tldr Wed 05-Apr-17 20:41:09


Rainatnight Wed 05-Apr-17 22:14:27


ChoccyJules Wed 05-Apr-17 22:21:49

I realised the title made no sense if I wasn't going to explain. Sorry about that. I am aware I am making no sense and it's not really a thread but I am grateful for the cake and the space to vent among friends. Thanks to all my friends here who know my situation and are so supportive.

OP’s posts: |
comehomemax Wed 05-Apr-17 22:36:07

I think you get the prize for the best thread title ever in the adoption boards, choccy!
Thinking of you! Whatever they are up to, smile and nod through gritted teeth!

conserveisposhforjam Wed 05-Apr-17 23:27:32

<pauses with lighted taper in hand over petrol soaked matching bench>

What's that now?




gabsdot Thu 06-Apr-17 00:07:50

If you're bitching about SW count me in.


katedan Thu 06-Apr-17 01:39:45

You do realise that SW are people don't you OP. They are doing very difficult thankless job which often takes them away from their own families to help and support families they work with. The pay is terrible and the hours are long and rarely in the history of the job does anyone say "thank you". You are everyone's whipping boy from management and families. Everyone wants you to be perfect and do everything immediately for them without realising that you often have another 30 kids on your caseload whose families also demand 100% from them. You might hate your SW but have you ever thought about what you and others expect of them and how very hard the job is.

Rainatnight Thu 06-Apr-17 04:30:08

We all get that it's a hard job. I couldn't do it.

But some of us have been on the receiving end of behaviour from social workers that ranges from the pleasantly incompetent to the downright shitty. And as adopters, sometimes we need to let off steam about it. And this place - the adoption board - is the place to do that.

Rosieandtim Thu 06-Apr-17 08:17:46

Too right, rain. If I were as incompetent as some SWs I've met, I would have been sacked. My job is also as described, and I work hard. But being shit at it is not tolerated.

SWs expect adopters to be so grateful, they'll put up with anything.

It's hard being a children's SW. The birth parents don't want you, the kids don't want you. The only people who have to lick your arse for a while are adoptive parents. And some of them need that so much, they milk it, and get aggressive when adoptive parents don't just lick their arses, but expect them to do their fucking job.

conserveisposhforjam Thu 06-Apr-17 09:46:38

My issues with SS have zero to do with them not doing things quickly enough and everything to do with incompetence, willingness to accept the lowest of standards, lack of understanding of basic science, statistics and medical information and a tendency to lie - or at least obfuscate and blame someone else- to cover their arses.

None of which can be explained by the ubiquitous 'high case loads' which always get trotted out.

tldr Thu 06-Apr-17 10:30:55

conserve you and your sugar-coating. You should just say what you mean. grin

Rainatnight Thu 06-Apr-17 10:38:05


conserveisposhforjam Thu 06-Apr-17 11:50:23


cupcakesandchampagne Thu 06-Apr-17 12:54:47

flowers katedan. Some of us out there hear you!

donquixotedelamancha Thu 06-Apr-17 13:50:22

@Choccy. I think you are onto something. They are impossible to pin down then materialise all of a sudden, timescales mean nothing to them, they are confused by concepts we take for granted (returning phone calls?), they always claim to have been saving the world while they were off, and they seem to regenerate into a new version every so often. It's so obvious when you think about it.

@katedan. All the SWs from my VA are fab and from the LA have been terrible, so I strongly suspect that the systems and support in an organisation are the deciding factor. I think most people on here know how good SWs can be and have quite a nuanced understanding of why they often aren't. You are dead right in everything you say. but I would support rain's point that a bit of venting is healthy.

Kr1stina Thu 06-Apr-17 18:57:14

Kate - you sound unhappy in your job.

Can I suggest that you start your own thread on an appropriate board on MN, as this board is to provide support for adoptees, birth parents and adopters. It's not really the place for SW to look for validation and help for their own issues.

ChoccyJules Thu 06-Apr-17 19:19:07

Erm, yep. Sorry folks, didn't mean to cause a rucus.
I too know about caseloads, deadlines and working hard for vulnerable children. The difference being I don't place playing God over clear thought and I don't lie.

OP’s posts: |
Kr1stina Thu 06-Apr-17 19:30:11

You didn't cause anything choice, you just asked for support




Kr1stina Thu 06-Apr-17 19:31:08

choccy even

cupcakesandchampagne Thu 06-Apr-17 20:31:13

I am not sure that this is healthy venting. I am finding it a bit unpleasant. No doubt I will now be told to go and start a new thread.

MrsSVN Thu 06-Apr-17 21:00:26

As a potential adopter and someone who has worked in SW teams I took the post in the spirit it was intended! I would find things just as infuriating on the inside...the high case loads, lack of supervision etc etc. I changed jobs to one where I actually felt helpful! I think something that I realised very very quickly in SW teams is how much everyone is 'winging it' and hoping for the best. It also depends whether you're speaking about an adoption SW or the child's SW as their jobs and caseloads and day to day work is v different. Anyway...I'm probably over thinking what was really just an expression of frustration! I must utter the words f***ing social workers several times a day at that we're considering adoption I expect that'll increase tenfold! wink

conserveisposhforjam Thu 06-Apr-17 21:07:24

Hardly a new ruckus choccy. A recycled ruckus at best grin

We only have three arguments on here and this is number 3 of 3. no please, nobody mention the other two by name

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