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Timeframes and Notice

(11 Posts)
FirstTimeAdopters Mon 13-Jun-16 14:11:01

Hello, new here! Fantastic to come across such useful resource, will definitely revisit as we progress with it all... So - We have been matched with a baby and have panel (matching) booked in 3 weeks. We would like to schedule introduction and the rest of it asap (pending approval etc.) - Join with our future child as as soon as possible. However, I'm working full time in quite a unique position (not so much part of a team). I appreciate work will need a few weeks at least to get ready for my departure. However, I don't want to give notice just yet... Nothing's final until it's final right? On the otherhand, if I delay this until after panel it will only leave two-three weeks for handover. Anyone with a similar experience? Thanks!

tldr Mon 13-Jun-16 14:15:43

I told work as soon as I was reasonably confident it was going to happen (before matching panel) and told them I'd give them an exact date when I had it. Until then all I could do was say 'it's not going to be this week'.

It's tough, because you really don't know.

Because the other thing is too, after matching panel, before intros, you won't give a crap about doing a handover. grin

RatherBeIndoors Mon 13-Jun-16 15:36:24

Realistically, they don't send people to matching panel unless they are pretty confident of a successful outcome (although you're right, no guarantees). After matching panel, it could be anything between 1-30 days to get the ratification from the Agency Decision Maker, and introductions start after that. Some LA's have an introductions planning meeting before the ADM approval.

I told work before matching panel, because it felt fairest, within a really hard-to-predict context. Intros started 2 weeks after matching panel because everything was in place by then. Brace yourself, and good luck!!

UnderTheNameOfSanders Mon 13-Jun-16 18:01:34

I told work informally as soon as we knew we were going to panel, but stressed it couldn't be 'official' until after panel.

We had already dealt with handover by saying it was important that more than one person knew about any important job so I had already passed on key knowledge (some of the team knew I was adopting and others not).

I had 4.5 days at work after panel before I stopped work.

JustHappy3 Mon 13-Jun-16 23:19:42

So what's the worst that could happen if you tell work now and it did fall through? What is it you are worrying about?

It's unlikely not to - it's pretty much a done deal when you go to panel with everyone in agreement and the paperwork sorted.

And you don't have to rush into intros.

FirstTimeAdopters Tue 14-Jun-16 21:18:00

Thank you all for the replies! I think I'm just really nervous about it all pending approval. It's one thing sharing with HR, very different going public with colleagues etc. What if it fails for some reason? Some horrible explaining to do... I would however like to move into intros quickly so will take advice and share a tentative timeframe. Otherwise we won't be able to do so.

UnderTheNameOfSanders Wed 15-Jun-16 10:20:16

I do understand about not wanting to share too much.

I was in a team of around 8. My direct manager and a close colleague knew my DH and I were adopting, but the rest of the team didn't have a clue. So it was a bit of a surprise when I turned up the day after the panel, said we were matched and that I'd be off at the end of the following week.

Being able to tell my manager confidentially in advance did help me feel I wasn't leaving them in the lurch though!

best wishes.

MintyLizzy9 Wed 15-Jun-16 13:06:00

My manager and my team knew pre matching panel (I am HR!) but the wider business was after panel. I started my leave about 10 calendar days after panel (the day after the LA confirmed).

And congrats!!!!

dimples76 Wed 15-Jun-16 19:45:46

I had to tell the rest of my team before Matching Panel as the plan was MP on Wednesday and intros starting on Monday so I only had 2 days at work between panel and going on leave.

It is very uncommon for a match to fall apart at this late stage - I know if mine had I would not be able to just straight back into work and be business as usual.

Best of luck!

FirstTimeAdopters Mon 20-Jun-16 09:48:53

Well, now it looks like it will take a while before introductions start at all... Scheduling challenges from everyone involved (everyone but us - we're ready!)
So frustrating, this wait.

Italiangreyhound Mon 20-Jun-16 23:12:33

Glad it is looking like it is all coming together.

I was coming on to tell you that really the decisions are all pretty much made by everyone else!

We were not asked when we wanted to do anything at all! And we were so keen to adopt that failing illness or major tragedy we would have agreed to any date! So we were just given a date, for us it was matching panel and then two weeks later intros started.

I will tell you what I did and how it worked out....

I told my boss every step of the way, and he was very understanding. I shared with wider team when I knew that things were certain (Matching panel) and I wrote very detailed notes for who would replace me. My organisation could not recruit a person from outside to do my quite complicated job (or they did not try) and so two colleagues, one from team and one not, took over half my duties each for the year I was off.

Everything worked out quite well.

I'd say do be me, in this respect, because things worked well!

HOWEVER, my only thing that did not work well was due to me!

When I had my birth dd (11 years ago) I took work home when I went on maternity leave and worked all the way up to the point where I was being taken in to the hospital to be induced, stopping at a colleagues house to drop off the work on the way to the hospital!

When we adopted I did virtually the same thing, working from home during intros in the evenings because I am so anally retentive I hate to let go!!

Don't be me ! Give them a date, when you know, write copious notes, stick to the date. Stop, relax, become a mummy!!

Good luck. thanks

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