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Birth control to show commitment?

(12 Posts)
MrsH1989 Thu 10-Dec-15 21:41:11

Hi All

Thanks you for your help earlier with the feeding issue. We took a break halfway and they went to the local sainsburys and ate there. PHEW!

They mentioned today that even though my DH has stopped producing sperm meaning that short of a miracle (or an affair) we cannot conceive, because we have a birth child we will need to go on birth control.

I am not bothered too much, happy to prove our commitment to the process, but I would rather not fill my body full of chemicals when it is not (medically) necessary. Anyone had to do this? What would you do?

Devora Thu 10-Dec-15 22:23:42

You know you really can't conceive? I would buy a pack of condoms. And probably not use them.

Does that sound awful? I think they are right to impress on you the importance of committing to the process, and not undergoing it while secretly hoping to fall pregnant. But they can't possibly know if people are complying: if you were secretly trying to get pg, you'd probably carry on. And if you know there is no chance of getting pg, you're not going to bother are you?

Obviously if there is a chance of getting pg you really really should use birth control. But you know that smile

tldr Thu 10-Dec-15 23:23:52

We had to agree to use contraception (and I think signed something saying we would) but really, they're not going to check. Smile and nod.

Kewcumber Fri 11-Dec-15 00:20:52

I wasn't asked to do this. I don't think my first social worker believed that single people had sex confusedgrin

MrsH1989 Fri 11-Dec-15 07:35:28

Yes we know we cannot conceive. We had tests done before starting the adoption process and they said DH had no sperm. Not one! I may go and get the pill but not take it...

Kewcumber Fri 11-Dec-15 09:53:50

I think very often they're looking for an enthusiastic - "yes absolutely no problem!"

delilabell Fri 11-Dec-15 11:10:09

We were asked and agreed but didn't have to sign something. We used condoms sometimes for a while but mpaned it was pointless as im infertile.....18 months after lo came home I'm 4 months pregnant!shock

MrsH1989 Fri 11-Dec-15 21:17:57

They got one kewcumber, I just thought afterwards, I dont know what to go on! lol

slkk Sat 12-Dec-15 09:55:24

Yes, smile and nod....

disneygirl10 Sat 12-Dec-15 13:24:22

I have no fallopian tubes and they still ask if I was on the pill!

TeamAcorn Sun 13-Dec-15 15:46:40

I told them the pill made me ill and refused to take it but we used condoms despite me being infertile. They were happy to consider condoms as equal to the pill.
Once we were matched we stopped using them.
I'm of the worrying type. Presumed knowing my luck I'd be that infertile friend you know who gets pregnant. Except I'd have a miscarriage and then wouldn't be able to adopt afterwards cause they'd known I'd lied. But from start to being matched was only 10 months, that's not too bad to put up with using them for the greater good, even though you know it's 99.99999999999999% a pointless exercise.

TeenAndTween Mon 14-Dec-15 21:43:26

I tried to have a coil fitted but couldn't manage it. So my GP wrote a letter to say we could not conceive and that was accepted.

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