Sorry for all the legal differences here, as DH and I have moved to another country. We are foster parents to two lovely LOs who have been with us over a year; SWs have now decided they shouldn't go home, but unfortunately in this country that doesn't mean adoption becomes possible, so we have been asked to become their permanent guardians instead. We are utterly sad that they are losing their parents and not getting the chance to get other parents, but this seems like the best that the system here can offer them so we are committed to trying to make it feel stable for them, and legally guardianship is very secure until they are 18.
At the moment we are negotiating with SWs over contact with the girls' parents, and I am really alarmed by what the SWs want to put into the guardianship order: they are proposing that LO1, who is 7, sees her dad every two weeks and her mum every two months, and that LO2, who is 20 months, sees her mum and dad every two months, permanently. We are worried that this much contact will complicate their developing attachment to us; SWs say there's nothing to worry about, and insist that the girls are already totally attached to us and we are basically their parents already!
We feel we have a tiny bit of leverage to try to persuade the SWs that it's more complicated. Can anyone recommend any resources (eg on open adoption) which give a properly researched perspective on how contact should be juggled with attachment, and especially how much is too much?
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contact with birth parents over the long term - how much is too much?
17 replies
Nuzza · 15/10/2015 18:26
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ConfusedInBath ·
16/10/2015 12:33
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