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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on adoption.

Have you been outed?

(7 Posts)
HereLetMeHelp Mon 01-Dec-14 01:50:20

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

Kewcumber Mon 01-Dec-14 10:35:50

Thank you - worth bringing to peoples attention.

I have been "outed" twice and it's not a problem for me. Security isn't an issue and I never post more than I would tell someone in real life. On the other hand - there are forums where I follow the same "rules" as you have on this one because I do post more problematic issues that I wouldn't want DS to be able to read. I certainly know of regular posters who change the details of their DC's.

Ironically I think that a bigger problem for me is reminding myself that the adoption board is read by a great many more people than who post and sometimes I forget its not just "us" as it were.

I do think having to name change is a shame because part of the sense of being a supportive community is recognising regulars and being able to know whats going on without a huge back story having to be trotted out. Though I do understand that some have more of a need for absolutely invisibility than others.

Kewcumber Mon 01-Dec-14 10:36:59

Though if you recognise someone in a forum like adoption why wouldn't you just tell them? confused

MyNameIsFled Mon 01-Dec-14 12:36:48

I echo the OPs advice. I was outed/stalked on MN before and it was a horrible experience with police involvement as personal threats were made. I try not to be identifiable and certainly not post specific details. Trying to band change more often too

definitelynotaweirdstalker Mon 01-Dec-14 12:43:13

I'm sorry.

I can see how if you looked at this un that would seem to be the case - I have lots of names and that thread wasn't about this board in particular or a poster here.

I have pmed the person who that thread was about and let them know.

The reason I wasn't sure whether to do that was basically this:

I do think having to name change is a shame because part of the sense of being a supportive community is recognising regulars and being able to know whats going on without a huge back story having to be trotted out.

but I thought it a good idea in the end.

It is why I commented on privacy on that other thread though as it has been on my mind. Because there is so much back story on some people on Mumsnet, and that is fine if you have thought that through but I'm not sure everyone has.

I am really really not a weird stalker either. I know there are possibly some people looking at the adoption board who we should be wary of but I posted about privacy to point that out rather than to appear to be one. I can see it was a poor choice of un given the history. Please nobody worry.

HereLetMeHelp Mon 01-Dec-14 12:58:57

Message withdrawn at poster's request.

definitelynotaweirdstalker Mon 01-Dec-14 13:36:37

Yes well you've kind of made my point for me in your OP smile

I really didn't want to distress anyone.

I may discard this un now as it seems to be a bit worrisome.

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