OK so I know we have been over this a million times before but humour me, please, guys, I am a planner.
When little one is here can I...
- Have a friend over for a coffee if DH is here to entertain my new little one?
- Go out to a friends for a coffee if DH is here to entertain my new little one?
- Go to Taekwan-do at tea time if DH is here to entertain my new little one? (Or is it better to go at bed time, one class would have me out of house 6.15 to 7.45 and the other from 7.00 to 9.00?_if DH is here to entertain my new little one?)
- Let whole family Skype with my sister (the most significant family member for me) before he meets her?
- Let whole family Skype with grandparents, my in-laws (the most significant family member for DH) before he meets her?
- Let new Little one meet family after 4, 5, 6, 7 or 8 weeks? A fairly informal meeting e.g. lunch in a cafe/pub lunch or soft play?
- Go to soft play at all!!! (Been told it is a no no but he has been before and loves it?
- Go to church, when to start, I do feel it is easier for him if it is just part of life but social worker said do nothing for a month and everyone on Mumnset adoption boards said varying degrees of several months up to the rest of my life (joke )
- How do I find the balance between being his most significant other (with DH), letting my world revolve around him, having some semblance of normality for me, DH and DD and resisting urge to show off my gorgeous new son to friends!!!
BE KIND WITH ME (I expect you told me it all before).... some history. He is a very well adjusted and socialised child but also can be anxious. He has come from foster home where there were lots of other people, especially kids but also extended family etc so busy life is normal for him BUT of course I know we need to bond, then attached and I am a hopelessly sociable person too!
If you are not an experienced adopter please do feel free to comment but please let me know your experience (and lack of it) in this area as, obviously, weight will be give to the been-there-done-that crew!