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AA child with FAS, history of pre-adoption abuse, plus more.

(26 Posts)
BurlyShassey Mon 14-Oct-13 19:09:20

Writing on behalf of a friend(shes here with me).
Shes a single parent, was approved for adoption AS a single parent.
her child (beautiful child) has a history of FAS, drugs in womb also, physical, sexual and mental abuse, child also has tourettes and severe autism, and aspergers.-child was adopted at 5 years old after being in care for 2 years-.
has severe behavioral problems/learning difficulties/anger issues/sharp memories.

my friend is a brilliant mum (not just saying that cos shes here!), loving, supportive, child being given a decent Christian upbringing, but she feels stigmatised as shes a ''single parent on income support and not childs REAL mum as child didnt come out of her belly''. and I can tell you she IS childs mum, the only mum childs ever known and the most loving mum.

and child was expelled from junior schiool as their behaviour was beyond help.

well child is now a teenager and has growing pains etc that they cant understand. friend crying (as am I writing this) as child is punching her and hurling verbal abuse at her. child doesnt mean it, ive had it from them too, its their condition, but friend isnt getting ANY help from anywhere, only me as ive worked with sn kids and can help up to a point. CAMHS dont want to know, FAS agency washed their hands, chikld has so many complex needs no agency knows what ''box'' to put child in to get help.

are there any adopters out there with challenging kids and dfo/have social services and the rest helped them AT ALL? friend has gone from pillar to post for YEARS to no avail. ive even written and spokjen to agencies to support her.

shes a brilliant mum and a lovely person but shes scared of her own child now and feels likea failiure (which shes not, its not her fault).

sorry this is long, and theres more! we'd appreciate any feedback.

BurlyShassey Thu 24-Oct-13 17:48:10

Think she's been looking into that too. Im still waiting for a response from them too! thanks x.

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