Hey all, I have a couple of questions here...
I've been with my partner since my son was a few months old (he's now 12) and although my boy is fully aware that he's not his "real" dad, he considers him to be dad. He's met his biological dad once, and wasn't impressed.
We were thinking the other day and realised that if anything ever happened to me, my partner would have no legal rights whatsoever over our boy, so we're looking at adoption. (We do not intend to marry, although we would possibly consider it if it would make the process easier). Our boy loves the idea of dad becoming legal dad and is all for it.
Biological dad has seen my boy once in 12 years, and doesn't pay maintenance, although we keep in touch sporadically and are on generally friendly terms.
My concern is actually for biological dad - we had a fling while he was separated from his wife which resulted in my beautiful boy, he eventually went back to his wife, but his wife doesn't know about his extra son as biological dad didn't want to tell her (even though they were separated at the time). I'm worried that social services will contact biological dad, it says they will want to do a "report" on him for the courts. I don't want to cause him any problems, he's never caused us any problems and is basically a decent guy, but if SS turn up on his doorstep his wife is going to find out.
He is named on my boy's birth certificate, but as far as I can tell, he has no parental responsibility as it was before 2003, and he has no contact or financial contribution, so would they need to contact him? Could he just get a letter to his workplace to sign or something? I know he won't object to the adoption if it's what we (me, partner and our boy) want to do.
The adoption will go through eventually regardless as me and my partner will do what is best for our boy, but I'd like to avoid problems for biological dad if I can.
Any advice or insights are appreciated!
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Partner adoption and biological father
32 replies
atomich01 · 28/09/2013 10:19
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