Have namechanged - I'm not even sure why, I'm not well known at all!
I was approved at panel a year ago today, for 2 siblings aged 2-6. I am still waiting. Everywhere you look, all the adoption info is all about how the desperate need is for adopters for older children and sibling groups. Yet everyone I've met through prep etc wanting a baby was placed almost immediately, and here I am.
My SW is useless. I have to chase her all the time, about everything. I had to ask her 3 times to refer me to the national register, she eventually managed it. I went to an exchange day several months ago -which incidentally my SW said she would make me flyers for, but 'forgot' - and came back with a huge stack of profiles, as you can imagine given that I'm looking for older and sibs. Several SWs showed interest in me, but it all stops when it gets to my SW. I feel like she is keeping me on the back burner for when they have sibs inhouse they can't match. My SW has even told me before now she's had SWs email about me, but she hasn't read their emails! Occasionally she sends me children's profiles from other SWs, but when I say I'm interested, nothing happens.
I always email with her, as I can't phone when I'm at work and there's no answerphone to leave a message out of hours. I've emailed her so many times asking for a review meeting, for an update, for any info on what is happening. She doesn't reply to my emails. I tried raising my concerns with the team manager when I went to a regional exchange day - she told me no SW will ever choose a single adopter over a couple, so I should be lowering my sights to harder to place children. Finding children I'm interested in is not the problem, there are loads, some even with SWs who are interested in me, the problem is my SW does nothing about it! I felt like she was blaming me being single for my lack of progress - if they didn't want to place with a single adopter, why did they ever take me on?!
I wish wish wish I'd gone with a VA now - at least they'd want to find me a match. There seems to be no impetus whatsoever to match me. I've tried going round my SW as much as I can, by emailing other SWs my flyer directly when I see profiles I'm interested in, but then apparently they have to send info to my SW, so nothing comes of it.
I feel really angry, and sad, and frustrated, and trapped. If I'm approved by a team who have no placement for me, managed by a manager who seems to have no great opinion of single adopters, and with a SW who either can't or won't get it together to find me a match from another LA, I might as well not be approved at all.
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I have been approved a year and am very very fed up
44 replies
Verytiredofwaiting · 12/04/2013 21:17
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