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Lowering a BMI!!!!

(124 Posts)
Italiangreyhound Thu 11-Apr-13 00:24:41

OK, it's official, this little greyhound is less whippet

and more whipped cream!

My lovely social worker has pointed out my BMI is a bit high and asked what I think I can do about it. I said lower it. Of course. But it is actually quite hard. I have taken up running and Taekwan-do but I also love my food.

Please inspire me if you were also advised to lower the dreaded BMI and how you did it, please.

Thanks so much.

KristinaM Thu 23-Jan-14 16:52:26

Good luck to all you new healthy lifestyle peeps

tinkerbellpixie Sun 26-Jan-14 17:12:58

This thread got me gripped, DP and I are in the process of adoption, 1 LA turned us away due to DP's High BMI but refused to listen to the fact that he is healthy in every other way but he was too much of a risk to them.
Currently waiting for a well known VA to contact us but I need to get DP's BMI down

craftycreator Sun 26-Jan-14 20:33:06

Hi Tinker, we have to both lower our BMI's. Hubbys is rather high (and mine for that matter) hubby seems as committed as I am.

Does your partner want to loose weight not only for adoption but for himself too?

I am happy for you to PM me if you want discuss further but for my husbands confidentiality I won't advertise his weight etc on here. Me personally I don't care who knows but he is more concerned about it than I.


Italiangreyhound Sun 26-Jan-14 23:57:06

Thanks Kristina for your kind words.

Craft hi and good luck.

tinkerbellpixie great name! The good thing about BMI is that it can change, but it is very tough to move it! Some things work well for some people. I have friends who swear by Slimming World or Weight Watchers. I, personally, think a lot of food issues come from emotional reasons and sometimes we really need to deal with those at the same time as we lose weight so we don't put it back on! I am still going through that myself.

All the very best for your guys and your hubbies. Do check in and share good news if it helps.

KristinaM Mon 27-Jan-14 09:38:04

This is a good time time of year to be focusing on healthy eating and exercise, as so Many others will be doing the same .

There are lots of support groups here on mumsnet, just search them out and join in . There is lots of information and moral support. It doesn't matter than everyone has different reasons for wanting to get healthier -holiday, wedding, operation, adoption, TTC,

For those of you who fancy exercising but aren't the gym type, can I recommend couch to 5 k, C25K,which is a programme which gets you from being on the couch to running for 30 mins or 5 km in 8 weeks. It starts with just walking . Google it

There are lots of threads here on MN, full of people who said "I could never do that , I weigh * stone " . And they discovered they can .

Please don't think about it as " I've got to get my BMI down for these bloody social workers " . Because then you will probably put it back on later, which would be a shame. Think of it as an opportunity to get yourself healthier for yourself and your partner, as well as for your children ( to be ) .

crazeekitty Mon 27-Jan-14 10:22:24

Lift weights as well. Muscle has a higher metabolic weight than fat so even when you're not running you will need more energy to sustain muscle mass than if you didn't have any.

Promise it works. Just remember to eat lots of protein to help build the muscle and cut out the sugar / white pasta / bread.

tinkerbellpixie Mon 27-Jan-14 15:58:30

Thank you everyone, crafty I will send you a message but he is wanting to get it down for himself too but the words the social worker said hit quite hard

Italiangreyhound Mon 27-Jan-14 20:02:26

tinkerbellpixie sorry that the social worker has upset your DH. I can find it quite upsetting too when people call me out on my weight. I think for me it is totally justified and so although it is upsetting it is really pushing us to be healthier better versions of ourselves, not to turn into totally different people.

Little steps for me, but feeling better.

craftycreator Tue 28-Jan-14 13:20:46

Afternoon All

I don't wish to drift off topic and I by no means want to cause any offence to anyone but I find it incredibly frustrating when people talk to 'fat' people about the best way to loose weight, that they should exercise, eat certain foods, cut certain foods out etc. I have yet to meet a sensible 'fat' person who doesn't know what needs doing but lacks the motivation to do it. I am one of these people. Believe it or not I am a content fat person, but life has dealt it to me as an obstacle which means for reasons other than my choice I am being forced (if I want the family I so desire) to loose the weight, if it were not for this one reason alone I know I'd be happy being the person I am now. Not weighing more and not weighing less. Just living life as Me.

As I said I dont want to offend anyone and the help and support from everyone has been lovely its just I needed to get that off my chest. I may even be in the minority here and others may not feel the same but I feel over the course of my adulthood that people feel they have a right to talk to me like I'm stupid when it comes to my PERSONAL weight.

craftycreator Tue 28-Jan-14 13:25:44

Italian - do you feel its justified because your emotions are all caught up in the process or do you genuinely believe they are?

Either way as long as your happy then it doesn't matter I was just curious :-)

craftycreator Tue 28-Jan-14 13:26:48

Opps hit the wrong button. Congratulations on your as you say 'little' steps by the way :-)

crazeekitty Tue 28-Jan-14 21:42:00

Craftycreator .. I don't think you've given offence. I think the op wanted tips about what worked for other people so I hope those of us who have contributed have helped with that.

I wonder how many people have kept their BMI at 18.5 (or whatever arbitrary number is set) through the stress of the whole process and then post adoption order?

And what a nonsense BMI is. I'm size 8/10 with a massively high BMI because of the sport I do. Thinking about that, totally disregard my advice for losing weight. Ha!

I know skinny minnies who never get off the sofa and larger ladies who are always on the go and can out run any of the skinny minny couch potatoes. I know which will be better able to keep up with a toddler blasting about. It should be about lifestyle, not numbers on a chart.

Italiangreyhound Tue 28-Jan-14 22:03:32

Crafty you have not offended anyone, or at least not me!

You said...

Italian - do you feel its justified because your emotions are all caught up in the process or do you genuinely believe they are?

Either way as long as your happy then it doesn't matter I was just curious :-)

I don't understand the question. I am happy to answer but I am not sure what you mean?

Do you think I mean do I think my emotions being caught up in the adoption process if making me fat?

Italiangreyhound Tue 28-Jan-14 22:19:51

Crafty I think it is up to individual people what they eat and how much they do or not exercise, whether they want to over or under eat/be a 'healthy' BMI or be below or over the average BMI. I think that for people who are overweight we are now probably in the majority, at least in the UK.

I guess when you get into very high BMI's people are in danger of poor health.

I don't ever voluntarily go around giving advice to anyone, or at least not any more!

I have tried over many years to lower my weight and have had little success. I love myself and have pride in myself. But I do not want to be overweight. Not because of how I look but because it may limit my life expectancy, my health and to a certain extent what I can physcially do.

I have seen a great number of fatter people in my life having attended many slimming clubs and watched many, many programmes about fat people losing weight. Maybe because I have put myself in that environment and watched those programmes I have effectively searched out people who are fat and are not happy. I am sure it is not always the case that fat people are unhappy with their size.

I totally agree Crafty that people who are overweight or fat know a lot about weight loss, healthy food etc which is exactly why I feel that there are often emotional issues that keep people in patterns of over eating. This is based on my experiences and is not a reference to anyone else on here.

Italiangreyhound Tue 28-Jan-14 22:25:24

Crazeekitty I am now wondering how you can be size8/10 with a very high BMI. I am just curious, I don;t think your BMI can be any wher near mine. You tell me yours and I will tell you mine!! (Message me!!)

Italiangreyhound Tue 28-Jan-14 22:29:19

Although the BMI system is probably like many a bit flawed I think that it is a way of explaining how the weight affects a person. If I say I am 8 stone, or 10 or 14 stone or 18 stone you have no real way of knowing if that is healthy or how unhealthy that is. Once you know my height you would know if I were 8 stone and very tall I would be underweight. But once I tell people my BMI they know the range of weight I am in without seeing me or knowing my exact weight or height. I certainly think the bounderies are set in such a way that maybe we need to be more generous with them! So for example a person with a BMI of 41 wodl be morbidly obese and someone with a BMI of 39 would be obese, so you could say do those two points make so much difference, or being 29 or 31. I am not a doctor so I don't know but certainly you can see that there must be a big difference between 29 and 39!

What could we use to give a definitive number instead?

According to dear old Wikipedia "Obesity is a medical condition in which excess body fat has accumulated to the extent that it may have an adverse effect on health, leading to reduced life expectancy and/or increased health problems." Morbidly obese means significant health problems, again it is the individual's right to put their body through that, but personally I think it is not a good idea. Which is why I can see that local authorities would have concerns about parents who have high BMIs. I guess it just depends what they call a high BMI, overweight, obese or morbidly obese.

craftycreator Tue 28-Jan-14 22:49:07

Well firstly I should say I am glad I have not offended and secondly state that I wrote that post after a very awkward telephone conversation with the why weight service and was pretty annoyed.

I maybe should have provided a bit more info. I have from since I can remember been 'big' and was bullied from day dot at school and its taken me a long time to realise I am allowed to be liked and loved for who I am and I don't need to be someone I am not to be liked (wow that really shows my past insecurities) now I know who I am comfortable with that.

Italiangreyhound - Yes health does play on my mind, and like you have tried in the past with little success to loose weight. Its not an Excuse but its like my body is happy at my current weight, for the past 14 or so years its been this and no matter what I eat, how much exercise I do I pretty much remain this weight (maybe a few pounds here or there).

In regards to my question. I've perplexed myself lol. You said that in your case its justified that SW mentioned your weight, do you feel obliged to agree with what they say (I presume they told you to try and loose some) because you wanted this (Adoption) so much or because you wanted to do it anyway? Does that make more sense?

I am not asking you yo tell me but your BMI is closely guarded and it makes me curious as to what it actually is lol.

crazeekitty Tue 28-Jan-14 22:52:42

Hello again Italiangreyhound.

I agree that those upper numbers are going to suggest there might be underlying health problems. It's a flawed system for sure. What I was getting at is you can pack a lot of muscle and therefore have a high BMI because muscle is more dense than fat. So on paper I'm a high BMI but in person I'm not. My ad is always complaining I'm not squishy enough. We can never win I think is the short version.

Anyway, as the op, how is the BMI battle going for you? I did think from reading your post about food and emotion being closely linked that you are going to be a super adoptive mum because so many adoptive children have massive issues around food. You'll be in a great place to empathise with and support your lo when s/he comes home. My poor little ad has all sorts of food issues and it is a massive stretch for me to understand them because I've only ever seen food as something functional. I'm hungry so I'll eat. I'm not hungry so I won't. Choosing what I eat is no more of a decision than choosing which petrol station to go to to put fuel in my car. If you're already aware of all the emotions tied to food you're going to be well ahead of the game. Can you explain them to me please? I really really need to understand it better.

craftycreator Tue 28-Jan-14 23:01:47

CCrazeekity - when emotions get the better of you what is your go to to relieve those emotions? Do you run? Do you do a jigsaw? Do you have a bath?

I used to comfort eat, where you see food as a means to ending hunger I used to eat because it made me feel safe and secure. Because ironically I thought food could not hurt me. I would like to add I dont do this anymore and my main reason for snacking nowadays is boredom but im working on that too.

When people would tell me I was fat and useless its not inspiration to loose but the thought process used to be 'well if they think that then why should I try to be anything different' its not like it will make any difference.

crazeekitty Tue 28-Jan-14 23:22:14

Ty crafty. That makes sense. And your honesty is humbling I think is the right word.

Italiangreyhound Tue 28-Jan-14 23:39:00

Crafty pm me and I will tell you my BMI! It is not a state secret!

I think we all are lovely and wonderful people, sheer miracles. Big and fat, small and skinny, black and white, male and female. No one should be bullied NO ONE, being bigger or small is not an excuse for anyone ever to bully anyone!

Hope that you know bullying is something I utterly detest.

Italiangreyhound Tue 28-Jan-14 23:46:46

crazeekitty gee whizz, what a lovely thing to say. Thank you. I really do hope that the experiences I have had will help my child when I adopt, if they have issues.

Italiangreyhound Wed 29-Jan-14 00:17:30

Crazeekitty you said Can you explain them to me please? I really really need to understand it better. Well in one sense I can and in one sense I can't! Because we are all different and it may well depend on your child and her experiences.

Sadly, I think overeating in children might be something that could be sparked by a lot of things and please do not reveal information about your DD here because I don't want you to out yourself!

So for example living with a very poor diet of junk food, fats and sugar etc may well mean a child expects those foods, find comfort in those foods and wants them. I have had some success in eating more things like celery and red apples (both really juicy and crunchy) which I now totally love.

Also, for example kids who were deprived of food might feel they will never be full of never be fed enough. So hoard food and might not feel safe if they do not have good in the house, their bag or whatever.

If the problems are the former then you may just find a dietician who can help and maybe also someone (like Tanya Byron for toddlers and young children) or a book or website that helps.

This website may be useful, I really don't know...

On a basic level food and comfort are linked for us as babies, we feel hungry and mum or someone else feeds us and maybe cuddles us and we feel warm, loved and well fed, so as we get older and things get hard what could take away the sad feelings like food! I am just guessing why people over eat.

My reasons are probably quite complex, but I think that some of the things that I have just said would tick some boxes for me.

Also as a teenager I had OCD (I didn't really know why I had it and it was not that bad). I did not get any help for it and in my twenties it stopped and the over eating started. Over the years I had some success at weight loss and the weight has not gone up and up as it does with some people. It has fluctuated a bit. The problem was one of over eating and sometimes actually not enjoying what I ate. I would say that I had a problem with Impulsive eating rather than compulsive eating.

Over the last three years I have had some help to work on the problems related to food rather than just trying to lose weight. As crfaty says fatter people know all about weight loss and healthy eating!

If your DD has a problem can you get some specialist help from adoption services?

crazeekitty Wed 29-Jan-14 12:28:26

Thank you. That helps to understand. I'll try and see it through different eyes.

Unfortunately for dd she has so many issues that help for eating wouldn't solve the underlying causes. What she really needs is a more understanding mummy, but I'm trying. She would say I'm very trying. Ha!

Italiangreyhound Wed 29-Jan-14 12:29:23

I absolutely think getting at the causes will help the eating.

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