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Here are some suggested organisations that offer expert advice on adoption.


(1000 Posts)
Italiangreyhound Wed 12-Sep-12 01:36:19

Hi I am a newbie and only just started this journey, officially made the call last week.

Just interested how may other newbies are out there who are still in the early stages. I keep coming across people and recognising names. Anyone want to let on what stage they are at?

Namechangesforthehardstuff Mon 14-Oct-13 21:24:47

How unbelievably frustrating for you.

And not great practise for having kids.

Great practise for that would be if your SW came round and said 'Want you to go to panel' and you said 'OK then.' and she said 'NO NO NO! WON'T GO TO PANEL!' and then lay on the ground screaming and sobbing. grin

MrsBW Mon 14-Oct-13 21:50:43

^ haha... The image of that has cheered me right up!!

Unfortunately, blame can be laid squarely at SW's door... Would be 'easier' if it were something we'd done as we couldn't get as cross.

But the SW thrashing on the floor screaming 'NO PANEL!!!!' will see me through the coming days/weeks/months, so thank you! grin

Inthebeginning Wed 16-Oct-13 07:53:18

mrsbw that's horrible for you. Must be so frustrating. We've got a break from the course today. Back on Thursday and then the lady day in Dec. It's going well but I don't think I've concentrated so much in my life! had a day of separation, loss,abuse and attachment disorders yesterday which although I knew, was still very difficult when you think that your own child has suffered.
also met an adopter and foster carer too which was good.
People we are on with are 4 other couples. Two are really nice but one has opinions that I find quite difficult. I suppose this happens with any group of people you meet though. And I'm tired so I'm winey!
hope everyone else is ok.

Choccyjules Wed 16-Oct-13 11:06:45

The course is very draining, you're bound to be tired. Most training doesn't take such toll on the emotions, eh?

SW coming round later to see rest of our paperwork so can do all her checks. I guess Stage One is a lot of waiting for others to send stuff off!

Italiangreyhound Thu 17-Oct-13 11:28:11

MrsBW don't stress if it is social workers fault they can fix it. It will just take time. Deep breathe and listen to this... you can do it!

with words

I know it doesn't feel like it, but there is time.

I first wanted to have a family in 1992 (yes 21 years ago). I first thought about adoption as a single person (and realised I was too young and had no ability to do it) in 1994 (yes almost 20 years ago!). Talked to my then husband-to-be about adoption in 1999 (15 years ago), I first rang our county council about this in 2006 (7 years ago) and now I feel 2014 will be my year to adopt! I am bracing everything and knowing

with pictures

Or if you prefer a bit of bond... you guessed it still time - my favourite

Choccyjules Sat 19-Oct-13 16:00:00

Membership pack from Adoption UK has arrived, is it wrong to be so excited?!

Inthebeginning Thu 24-Oct-13 09:06:36

hi choccy we get free subscription when we've been approved at panel.
sw coming tomorrow to (hopefully) set up dates for stage two. Have promised myself that when she does I will relax and start looking forward to things (rather than being a stressy nervous wreck! )
hope everyone else is ok

Inthebeginning Fri 25-Oct-13 18:41:12

we are tgrough to stage two! Got all our meetings booked in and will be going to panel end Jan beginning of February! !!!!

Choccyjules Fri 25-Oct-13 19:39:19

Wahey! All zooming along for you :-)

Meita Sun 27-Oct-13 15:19:43

Yay Inthebeginning! It must all be starting to feel very real now!

Inthebeginning Sun 27-Oct-13 20:09:38

Thanks both Yes it is! dh yaa been at work all weekend as we aee going on hols this week so I've written up a chunk (7200 words! ) of our par to send off to our sw worker. How is everybody else? We are going away for a very adulty few days with much wine and shop wandering. Can't wait!

Choccyjules Sun 27-Oct-13 23:42:41

Ooh enjoy!

Inthebeginning Sat 02-Nov-13 22:58:04

Hi everyone, how are things going? We are back from our hols and ready to crack on. Sw seeing us 6times between now and Christmas and I'm going to get a bit more of our par done. I do like being able to do it as it gives me control over something.

Inthebeginning Fri 08-Nov-13 21:15:39

just had a meeting with our social worker and we have got our panel date through for the end of January! arrrrgggghhhhh!
Feel excited nervous and scared!

How is everyone else?

x x x

Italiangreyhound Fri 08-Nov-13 21:23:59

Inthebeginining HOOORAY! Hope all goes well.

prumarth Fri 08-Nov-13 22:32:24

Fantastic - a big milestone to reach inthebeginning, well done

32flavours Sat 09-Nov-13 10:37:26

Hi, how's everyone's adoption journeys going? Just wanted to thank you all for the advice and support you've given. Everything seems to be coming together for us now. We've been assigned a sw and she's the same lady who's visited us a few times before. I'm really happy because I feel like we've already built up a bit of a rapport with her and we both really like her. We're moving house next month as we currently live in a flat in the city centre, it's not really a child friendly place as it's very close to all the clubs and pubs. I went to view a house this week and it was perfect! A nice safe area with lots of parks nearby, a lovely little garden and close to a primary school. When I was talking to the landlady I mentioned that we were hoping to adopt hence why we were moving. Turns out she's a sw herself and was really positive about us wanting to adopt. The house has been their family home for many years so I think she really wants to ensure whoever moves in will love their house as much as they do. We've put our application in for the house and are I'm just waiting and crossing my fingers now. I've got my heart set on this house, I can really see us bringing up a family there.

bertiebassettsbelly Sat 09-Nov-13 12:21:57

In that's amazing!!!!!grin Congratulations and fingers crossed that the day is good and comes very quickly for you!
We are half way through stage one now, we have completed all of the initial paperwork, including the mammoth task of our life chronology- that certainly got the old grey cells working overtime! I had my medical yesterday, which was completely fine other than my BMI, but I knew that might be an issue and I have been working on it all year, so it is going down.
32 I will keep everything crossed for you that you get your new house, it sounds lovely and such a good coincidence that the landlady is a social worker.
Hope that everyone else is doing well smile

Choccyjules Sat 09-Nov-13 18:04:57

We've just been asked by the LA to book pur medicals and the GP is apparently going off for a few weeks :-(
So it looks like our Stage one is going to be extended by who knows how long....
There was me thinking we'd go to panel by the end of March. Hahaha.

Inthebeginning Sat 09-Nov-13 18:51:53

choccy ours wasn't with our own gp. At our drs they have a certain one to do them. Just a thought?

Inthebeginning Sat 09-Nov-13 18:55:16

thank you everyone. we are very excited that we've now got our date. We went into mamas and papas today. First time we have in three years!

Choccyjules Sat 09-Nov-13 19:11:15

That's a thought but we have specifically named the GP who saw me through PND so really would like her to fill the form in.

Choccyjules Sat 09-Nov-13 19:12:18

Excited for your shopping excitement, btw,

namechangesforthehardstuff Sat 09-Nov-13 20:15:56

Hi all <waves>

Lots of exciting things happening here. Inthebeginning you're fast progressing to 'not being a newbie' status. Big congrats smile And 32 fingers crossed for your house. choccyjules surely if the BMI were a big thing they'd have let you know by now?

Prep course for us next week ARRRRGGGGGHHHHHHHH! A bit soon and full on but am looking forward to it. We are on our third social worker which has to be something of a record given that we have only just started Stage 1?

Ooooh and I had an amusing medical where my GP was very apologetic about having to do a breast exam (no idea why - I was cool with it, thought it was saving me a job wink) and at the end she said, in a kind of relieved slightly nervous way 'OK that's all finished now...Beautiful breasts!'

So that's a medical opinion from a trained professional that is. I'm having that on my headstone.

I bet she went out back and banged her head repeatedly on the wall for a few minutes afterwards...

Italiangreyhound Sat 09-Nov-13 20:26:35

namechangesforthehardstuff how lovely, a medical and a compliment. Good luck.

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