Positive stories of having 2 DC over 40?

[GreenAndAmber]

I had my first baby just before I turned 41. She is now a year old. My DH and I would ideally like to have two children. I had a cesarian and was told not to conceive for 18 months, so that would be next Jan to conceive at the earliest. I am also very aware that conceiving may not be as easy as it was last time, or maybe it would be - we can't know. In many ways I dread the thought of another baby, and I haven't always loved the baby stage, but I adore my DD of course, and love it now she can walk around and do more stuff, and I do imagine having two children in the future if possible. In an ideal world, I would always choose a longer gap between babies so that the elder one is at school, but this isn't reality. In addition, we are putting our house in the market and are looking to relocate around new year which is always stressful. So much to think about and deal with I know.

I just wanted to hear from anyone who had two DC after 40 and how they managed it. Ideally I'd love to hear any positive stories from mums who've managed it successfully and kept their sanity. I am (or was) very fit and sporty before DD, and visualise getting myself back to fitness once we have finished having babies, but I know that mid 40's nothings as easy. Before anyone says don't have DC after 40, I didn't meet my husband until I was 38. Sometimes life doesn't pan out how you planned it.

[endofjune]

Similar boat here. I had ds when I was 40, conceived at 39.

I’d like another but will be 42 so hope i am able to without any issues.

[butterflyfox]

I had mine at 43 and 44. I would have loved them 10 or even 20 years earlier but as you say, you don’t always get to choose the timing. Since I did not have children in my twenties I have nothing to compare it to in terms of tiredness/recovery. My choice was not have them in my twenties or have them in my forties. It was have them in my forties or not have them at all. I am very very very glad I did Being older has the obvious advantages. I am richer and I have got to a level at work where I am more in control of my agenda. I had decades to have fun party travel etc so I don’t resent or miss any of that. I did find one baby super easy ( unlike you I adore the baby stage). Baby two arrived super quickly (they are like busses) and I found a newborn and a one year old a bit tricky but I don’t think that it was more tricky because I was older. And they are upstairs giggling together now and I am soo glad they have each other and always will - when they are left orphaned imminently by my selfish act of having them in my dotage.

[GreenAndAmber]

Thank you, it's so nice to hear positive stories. I agree with you @butterflyfox that being a mum in my 40's suits me way better than it wouldn't done earlier and I've done the travelling, the clubbing etc. I'm emotionally far far far better equipped than I ever was in my 20's or 30's. I guess I'm just hoping I can still physically recover from the pregnancies, births, sleeplessness and sacrificing everything so that one day I can still feel peak fit and healthy again!

[Jjacobb]

I had ds at 40. Dd came along when I was 46 but was adopted so I can't help with pregnancy issues. I found the age gap perfect They are 20 and 14 now and I have no regrets.