Might've just cried in the supermarket car park

[theweebabydonkey]

Well it was just one of those things that just tip you over the edge.

I just went to a well known supermarket to do a half-weeklyish shop. I always use the scan as you shop thing because I love just going in, headphones in and getting the shop done without having to chat to anyone.

Well, I finished my shop and went to put it through and I was selected for a random check. Let me just stress right now, this is absolutely fine. I'm happy with the random checks. I saw on the handset it said five items would need to be scanned so I stood back at an appropriate socially distanced distance while the young man started scanning some shopping.

Next thing, he starts scanning way more than five items. I think "oh shit did I accidentally not scan something so it's come up with a problem?!"
So I said "is there an issue" and he said "no I would just feel more comfortable if I could scan your whole shopping"

I was eh?? I said, more comfortable? Why do you need to scan it all is there a discrepancy? He said "no, I would like to scan your whole shopping as I'm well within my right and I think I would feel more comfortable to do this rather than just the five items"

Omg i got so flustered. I asked him was I making him feel uncomfortable? He said "no I just want to scan your whole shopping, I would feel better if I could do that and once you pick up the scan as you shop handset you enter into a contract statin we can scan your whole shop"

So clearly he thought I had been on the thieve but after he rescanned and re bagged my WHOLE shop there were no issues, I had scanned everything and he sent me on my way.

Ive had a terrible week (long story, won't go into it) and tbh it was kind of the straw that broke the camels back. So I went to the car packed in my shop and sat there and had a little cry. It's bloody pathetic of me I know. But he totally singled me out for thinking I looked like I would shoplift. I was in a (what I thought was on trend) tracksuit bottoms and oversized sweater from Zara but now looking back maybe I looked a bit scruffy? My hair was scraped back and I certainly had no make up on although I was wearing a mask.

Anyway I know this isn't AIBU but would I be U if I asked the head office if this is standard procedure? It really embarrassed me and has put me off going back tbh. I totally understand the random checks of 5,10 items. But for a cashier to decide just by looking at me he should rescan my whole shop, it just felt too personal.
Although i mentioned my head isn't in a great space right now so maybe I took it more personally than I should.
Please be kind, I've already cried once (in a supermarket car park) today

[ForTheLoveOfWine]

I’m sorry your having a tough time this is standard where I shop and they re scan the whole shops. It’s totally random and nothing personal

[Gingernaut]

Don't complain.

These things happen.

Cry away, though. It's cathartic.

[MrsTerryPratchett]

It's probably a cushy job so he's eking it out.

Noting to do with you

[Shinyletsbebadguys]

Do you know what my first thought would be ? That he has screwed up a few times and was worried about his own ability. Honestly I bet it wasn't you. Perhaps he'd missed things once or twice and didn't want to risk it again. Or maybe he was new and was a tad over zealous. Honestly I bet it had nothing to do with your appearance.

I totally empathise with the straw breaking the camels back. Last night I cried because DP took my bath slot . Ridiculous but just pushed me over the edge.

[PostmanSplat]

You need to be kind to yourself. Will reporting it make you feel better? Or will it just keep it in your mind?
Would it be better to go home, have a bath, listen to music, light a candle, eat biscuits, whatever you do to chill and try and forget about it?

[bibbidybobbidyboo]

I'm sorry you're having a tough time OP. I'm going to echo the others and say that I don't think this has anything to do with you - I think it's the cashier wanting to make 110% sure that they haven't made a mistake, probably because they have made mistakes in the past.

[Nancylovesthecock]

I think your overreacting somewhat.

They once found a small box of sweets my DC had thrown in totally unbeknownst to me and had to rescan my entire shop. Its protocol. I didn't feel like they thought I was a shoplifter.

[ArosGartref]

I've only ever used scan and shop once and I got checked. They scanned everything - that's what the check is for, unless I've misunderstood?

I never wear makeup so I might always look like I'm on the take.

Supermarket carparks are one of my favourite places to cry though.

[covetingthepreciousthings]

Sorry you're having a tough time, and I hope you can relax for the rest of the night

I agree with PP above who said it's probably more about him not wanting to miss anything, maybe he's made a mistake before. Try not to take it too personally if you can.

[Cavagirl]

Sorry OP
In the kindest way, it's probably more a reflection on how your week is going the fact that you've assumed you are the reason he wanted to rescan all.
You said he was a young man - I suspect it's quite possible he didnt know exactly what he was doing so rescanned everything, or was having a super keen moment. If it's Waitrose their rescan rules seem pretty nuts and they need to scan a number of items but also up to a certain value which inevitably means doing the whole bag ime. He didn't say you made him uncomfortable. You don't look like a shoplifter, I'm sure.
Sending an unmumsnetty hug

[EarringsandLipstick]

There's nothing odd with rescanning the whole shop. That's what happens where I am all the time. (The bit about 5 items didn't make sense to me).

I'm sorry you're upset, but you are over-reacting & did also to the shop assistant. Don't raise it with Head Office.

Go home & put it behind you.

[BobBobBobbin]

Sometimes it’s the little things that push you over the edge

It sounds like either it was a random re-scan (happens to me periodically, always when I am in a rush) or he messed up somehow and ended up having to rescan it.

[thelegohooverer]

I agree with other posters saying it probably wasn’t about you, but about him. But I completely understand how you feel. I lost my shop card and couldn’t do the scan thing anymore and it was a revelation how much less stressful it was! I absolutely hated the random checks.

[GlumyGloomer]

Here's another possibility: new cashier has to do a spot check on a customer, has a little panic about choosing 5 items (most expensive? One per bag? Close his eyes and lucky dip?) And decideds he feels more comfortable just scanning the whole lot. When questioned he falls back on quoting the company policy he just read on his induction.

Obviously I made that up, but it's plausible and had absolutely nothing to do with you. Honestly, don't let it change where you shop. People are usually too wrapped up in their own heads to judge others half as much as we think they do.

[PurpleWh1teGreen]

If your scanner thingy said it needed to be 5 random items, then I would be wondering if he had overreached.

You could follow up and ask what the policy is, from the store manager or head office and look to complain if you find out you were singled out.

On the other hand, if you have had a rubbish week - and I’m sorry to hear that - you could buy yourself a big bar of chocolate and think fuck it and move on. At least you shouldn’t get another random check for a while.

[Gunpowder]

Oh you poor thing! Please don’t let this upset you any more. DH always does self scan in Sainsbury’s and reckons 1 in 50 times they rescan his whole shop, he goes by the minute and they know him, nothing has ever been wrong but it’s still fine.

Maybe the guard sensed you were anxious and assumed it was because you were shoplifting whereas actually you were worried you had done the wrong thing, but maybe it was just your turn. Don’t let his clumsy wording clutter up your brain. You did nothing wrong.

[ImInStealthMode]

Don't overthink it OP. It's standard for them to randomly scan the whole shop where I am (very naice area too so I can't imagine they suffer too much with people nicking things, getting caught would be social suicide if nothing else) x

[Vallmo47]

Sorry you’re having a shitty time but I agree with others, just let it go. Hope your week improves! 🥰

[NicolaDunsire]

I’m sorry you’re having a rough time.

[conywarp]

This is very odd. It's a computerised system which prompts a random amount of items or a full check. The staff don't get to over ride that. You must have either misunderstood what he said, what he did, or misread the scanner (you would have been stood back at the social distance you describe by the time the number of items required to scan would show on screen as the staff have to scan their barcode first) please don't complain. There is not a chance in hell the person made a judgement that caused them to be able to override the system.

[WeAllHaveWings]

Standard at our tesco, they have random full scans, the staff person who I chatted while they were repacking my whole shop says they get so many to do each day. I've only had them twice but have seen others taken to the area where they are done.

I always feel nervous I made a mistake when they are done and breathe a sign of relief when I "pass"

It isn't personal and you are over thinking it was related to your appearance.

[theweebabydonkey]

Oh gosh you're all being so lovely I'm nearly gonna cry again

You're all right, I shouldn't take it personally. He was young so perhaps he was a little over zealous and keen not to make a mistake.

It wasn't Waitrose, it was one that might rhyme with Messco and I've shopped there for years and used scan as you shop since they first introduced it. It's always been a specific amount of items to be checked, depending on the size of the shop. Because this wasn't a huge shop it was only 5 items, I saw it on the handset.

Luckily I had bought a slab of choc to cheer me up in the ill-fated shopping so I'm tucking into that now. It's dairy milk Oreo and it's pretty good!

[Cavagirl]

enjoy your choccie OP.

[conywarp]

, it was one that might rhyme with Messco

Right. No idea why you need to hide the name but he definitely didn't override the system. There is some misunderstanding here somewhere.

For those who don't know about the system it will prompt a service check for a random amount of items OR a full shop on occasion. If the random amount shows an item hasn't been scanned it will then ask for a full check.

[vacuumnomore]

Last week I'd forgotten to scan 3 bananas and had my whole shop rescanned, felt slightly less like a thief when it was found I'd tried to pay for 10 red peppers instead of one
It sounds like he handled it really badly but does sound like it was a combination of protocol and he covering his own back, rather than your tracksuit or lack of make up xx