This is a Premium feature
To use this feature subscribe to Mumsnet Premium - get first access to new features see fewer ads, and support Mumsnet.Start using Mumsnet Premium
Dd always putting the heating on..(236 Posts)
For about 3 months now DD aged 11 turns the heating on randomly when it really is not needed. Mostly she gets up in the middle of the night/early hours to switch it on then goes back to bed which then leaves the flat stuffy.
Ive asked her nicely to stop doing this, if she is cold than she has access to an extra blanket/dressing gown etc which is at the end of her bed. Instead she is turning it on making the whole place ridiculously hot.
I have covered the thermostat so she cant turn the dial but she has learnt how to turn it on direct from the touch pad.
DH has said to her if there isnt a good enough reason for her to do this and it wont stop then there will have to be punishments as she is delibrately ignoring our requests and the gas bill is huge!!
Any suggestions on how to get her to stop doing this?
Is there any other issues at all?
Electric heater in her room?
Some people do run colder than others.
Getting up in the night to switch it on is a bit odd though as it means getting out of a cosy bed!
What has she said about why she's doing it and when she's doing it?
I don't think this is about the heating....
Higher tog duvet on her bed or teddy bear bottom sheet and duvet cover to make her bed really cosy, if she has to get out from the covers to reach a blanket or a dressing gown then she is going to get even colder. I wouldn’t be able to sleep wrapped in a dressing gown so I don’t think that’s a reasonable solution anyway. Alternatively is she waking up due to needing the toilet and getting cold that way, if so can you look at the amount she is drinking before bedtime. I would be trying those first and making sure she wasn’t cold at night and seeing if that stopped her switching the heating on before I would be focussing on how to punish her if she did.
If you were really sure she wasn’t cold where is your thermostat /timer. Ours is in our utility room so we could easily put a bolt high up on the door outside that room where a child could not reach it.
I'm always cold. DP is never cold... we used to have thermostat wars until he bought me a ridiculously expensive gravity blanket. It has probably saved us a fortune in gas bills though as it keeps me warm and helps me sleep.
What does she say is the reason for her blatantly refusing to do as she's been told?
Because I'd be raging if this was one of my kids. I can't afford to run the heating at night.
Will she stop if it costs her all pocket money, social activities, clothes, takeaways, phone, etc? Because for lots of people an extra £20 a week on gas, for example, means cutting out £20 somewhere else. I'd be working out the cost and making sure she paid it by cancelling her phone or Netflix. Whatever.
You have told her to stop and told her why. She can't decide she's going to ignore that.
What does she say when you ask her why she does it?
Is she frequently this disobedient? Her sense of entitlement needs to be nipped in the bud and quickly.
Have you taken her for a checkup to rule out a medical reason for her constantly feeling cold?
I like to be very warm.
Two things on which I would never skimp: heating and hot water.
What has she said when you've spoken to her? I'd tell my DD how expensive it was, explain that I cannot afford it and work out another way to make sure she is warm enough at night.
It doesn't seem as though she is doing it for a laugh though OP or to be naughty. Surely she is cold? Buy her an electric blanket for her bed or do her a hot water bottle nightly, then she'd have no need or could turn the blanket on and off as she pleases.
I too would be ruling out any medical reason in the interest of fairness and safety if she is always feeling cold there is very possibly more too it. I'm constantly cold and have an underactive thyroid, for example.
OP what reason has she given you?
How did she explain getting up out of a warm bed in the night to do it?
Maybe she is cold and you are a cheapskate
Have you actually asked her why?
An 11 yr old getting up to put heating on is rather odd. Why is she up through the night? Surely it’s not that cold?
Warmer pyjamas? Thermals? A fleecy onesie?
I think you should sit down and talk to her about why she is doing this. Don't be mad or she won't open up if there is a problem.
Outline why you need it to stop, but work together to find a few options that will keep her warm at night. If she's old enough to know to turn on the heating if she's cold, she's old enough to help you work on solutions.
An electric blanket set on low in her bed, new PJs or an extra thick duvet all might help.
Two other options if she just won't stop are getting a thermostat guard with a key, or purchasing a smart thermostat which you can password protect.
Here's an example of a thermostat guard:
OP not been back?
OP what has she told you about why? Esp during the night.
Extra blankets etc don't warm up your face if the air temperature is cold. I've slept in places where my body has been toasty warm because of blankets but with a cool air temperature I've got a nose as cold as a snowman.
Like others have said, in the absence of other explanations, maybe she just notices the cold more? Have you tried talking to her rather than just telling her off and telling her to get more blankets?
I've said this before, but I think I might be part-lizard. I like the house to be hot like a sauna. My DP likes it freezing cold. It's no fun if you're too cold or too hot, so you need to work out what the issue is. If she's genuinely cold maybe a heater for her room only could warm up the air temperature?
You need to get to the bottom of why she is doing this. Sit down and have a good talk with her. Does she maybe need a thicker duvet on the bed if she is getting cold in the night?
Oh, I can’t stand the heating on in the night, I’d hate that. What an odd thing for her to do! What does she say about it?!
Maybe shes cold in bed.
I've felt like this quite a few time but unless its minus 0 I refuse to put the heating on at night. Just put pj's on or extra blanket on. I also can't sleep in a dressing gown so thats not a good suggestion for your dd.
One of mine did similar. I'd quite frequently wake up sweaty with the heating whacked up to 28 or come in to find the same. Ds is autistic and couldn't connect the dots really. He was cold and that was that.
We are on a tight budget and I’d be quite cross about this. There’s no reason anyone needs to be putting the heating on at night at this time of year particularly! Blankets, extra clothes etc work fine. I’d tell her only adults are allowed to touch the heating controls and if she continues there will be consequences (removal of privileges / restricted screen time etc). I’m generally the most laid back parent in the world but couldn’t cope with people touching the heating all the time and we just couldn’t afford the bill!