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Why is it so hard to be grateful?

(21 Posts)
beingmorepositive Fri 22-Jan-21 13:33:21

I'm trying to find 4 things daily to be grateful for, but I'm finding it so hard. You without lying about things that I should feel grateful about but aren't perfect 🤥 it seems contrived, but I'm trying to be more positive, so it's a daily exercise. First day .. can I put biscuits?

OP’s posts: |
thesandwich Fri 22-Jan-21 13:36:11

Of course! It's something that gets easier over time, but whatever brings you joy however daft or odd.
Sunshine, clean sheets, chat with a friend, something that makes you smile. Keep at it . It makes a difference.

GingerNorthernLass Fri 22-Jan-21 13:38:44

Of course!

Can be small things. You're probably overthinking it.

Mine are...

1. The sun is shining.
2. I don't have to work today.
3. My Waitrose delivery is due shortly.
4. I've sold two more bits of junk on ebay so crap out/money in.

Chatania Fri 22-Jan-21 13:40:39

Put anything. It doesn't have to be a big thing. The more you do it the more little things you can think of.

Xerochrysum Fri 22-Jan-21 13:40:51

That is a very good idea. Life would be way happier if we think about in positive way.
For me atm, sunshine through the window, dc jumping around having fun on the back ground, nice cup of tea, and the book I'm reading.

user1493413286 Fri 22-Jan-21 13:42:01

I wondered that when I did it for a bit of time but it only has to be small things - a peaceful cup of tea, watching a really good programme, getting something you’ve been meaning to do done

Breathmiller Fri 22-Jan-21 13:46:39

There is a great gratitude thread on philosophy/religion. It doesn't have to be big things at all. Enjoying your biscuit sounds a great one. It was a moment of pleasure or joy in your day.
I have done a gratitude practice with my son since he was a toddler at bedtime. As we are saying goodnight we both just ask "what are you grateful for?" I find it a great way to end the day. Even on the most difficult days it has always triggered us into finding something.

Xerochrysum Fri 22-Jan-21 13:48:54

This thread certainly made me smile. Thank you, OP!

AuntieStella Fri 22-Jan-21 13:48:58

I know someone who didn't like the term 'gratitude' because of connotations of obligation, deservingness and self-worth

Try instead 'things that I'm glad are in my life today'

It gets easier with practice - also you start to notice things that make you happy as they're actually happening and that's really nice

Mine so far today:
a) sun is out and sky is blue
b) looks like some early spring bulbs are coming up in the park
c) this morning's coffee was just right
d) zoom fitness class went really well

Pleaseaddcaffine Fri 22-Jan-21 13:50:38

Ohh I find this soo hard as well. I also find the self love stuff hard. So wiritng things I like about me down... I sat in front of a bank page for three days.
Well done on putting anything!

MrsR87 Fri 22-Jan-21 13:58:26

Biscuits definitely count!

What a great thread than can inspire us to be grateful for things we often overlook.

Here’s mine for the day:
1. My little boy is back to his usually happy, smiling self after an off day yesterday following his 8 week jabs.
2. Tonight is the last night I have to use my crappy oven than came with our new build. My new (self cleaning) one is arriving tomorrow.
3. The sun is shining.
4. There’s a bottle of Prosecco in the fridge

😍

CMOTDibbler Fri 22-Jan-21 14:03:48

Today I'm grateful its not raining, I found my favoured mascara which I thought I'd lost, I got a walk in the sun between meetings, and its clean sheets day. Not big things, but it all helps

DaphneBridgerton Fri 22-Jan-21 14:11:49

You can definitely put biscuits!

This reminds me of a conversation I once had with a (very good) therapist while struggling with daily headaches

I asked him how I could be grateful for anything when I had a headache all the time. He replied "Why don't you start off by being grateful that you have a head".

It made me laugh, but also made his point and I've never forgotten it.

LuvMyBoyz Fri 22-Jan-21 15:11:45

I’ve kept a gratefulness journal since 2016 and I love it. I put down anything special but also things that are normal but lovely like sharing a TV programme with DH, morning coffee drank in peace or getting a good night’s sleep. Keep at it. It makes you think and keeps you thinking.

Pundemmic Fri 22-Jan-21 15:16:40

I am a couple of years in and I am much happier than I was. I speak more positively to people and get a good reaction, I enjoy the time I have around people more and life is easier. I would definitely put biscuits on the list! Maybe listen to your favourite song and put that on the list toogrin. I’ve noticed that very few programmes these days are about normal people doing good things and feeling happy- but I wish there were more of them. I know that Jane the Virgin is Telenovela style but I did enjoy the absolute joy and fun and friendship she had and the way she found magic in the little things.

WishingHopingThinkingPraying Fri 22-Jan-21 15:22:13

Here's mine:
- It's Friday! I've worked hard all week and am going to have a glass of wine at 5pm
- I have no pain in my body, how incredibly lucky is that!
-all my immediate loved ones have so far escaped any illness this last 12 months
-my DH and I both have good jobs we can do from home. So grateful to have that stability.

SkyeIsPink Fri 22-Jan-21 15:25:48

I write 3 things I am grateful for every day. Sometimes it is as simple as the 3 C’s

Chocolate
Coffee
Cats

You should right down anything that gives you happiness, even if it’s something small!

WishingHopingThinkingPraying Fri 22-Jan-21 15:29:07

Can I keep going?
- I sleep well every night
- my kids are easy enough and wonderful characters
- I've a comfy bed and peaceful room
- i can see a lovely view right now
- my best friend delivered a perfect baby girl this morning
- my DH always has my back
- I've a fab dinner planned for tomorrow night
- the kids are managing their school work mostly
- I started watching Married at first sight last night and am addicted so have TV I'm looking forward to for the weekend
- fridge, freezer and log box are well stocked for the weekend
- my cat is so good and quiet and cuddly
- I'll chat with my mum and sister tomorrow and Sunday, grateful to have a great relationship with my family
- there's chocolate I'm my bedside locker
- the house is pretty clean and tidy
- M&S katsu curry readymeal for tonight so no hassle!

HiveQueen Fri 22-Jan-21 15:29:31

I’m doing this with my DD14 at the moment as she’s really feeling down. I am contriving some of the positives for her, like getting Subway yesterday and buying her a bunch of flowers when I went shopping.

It’s so easy to feel drowned in the negatives at the moment. We’re looking to book a cottage in the UK in the summer. She sees that as a negative as she doesn’t want to get her hopes up to find out we can’t go at the time.

Breathmiller Sat 23-Jan-21 18:56:07

@hivequeen i hope your daughter feels better soon
That's lovely that you are helping her to look for the positives and putting some obvious positives in her way.

AKissAndASmile Sat 23-Jan-21 18:58:14

Go right back to basics. We had a power cut today and it made me realise how much we rely on electricity and yet take it for granted. Everything I went to do I realised I couldn't because there was no electricity confused

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