Are we being silly?

[BabyBee93]

I recently stopped my hormonal contraception for medical reasons and have found that I really enjoy being hormone free. My libido has sky rocketed, sex feels SO good and I feel generally far better in myself. I’ve also been on hormonal contraceptions for a very long time and feel my body is due a chance to do its thing.

DH and I have been using condoms which we just loathe. The smell, feel and disposal is awful! Recently we've been a bit risky and have been “pulling out” which has so far (touch wood) has been fine. Obviously this isn’t a medically recognised form of contraception though, so are we being a bit silly? I’m really not ready to get pregnant but condoms are kind of ruining the sex (which is a shame because it’s SO good...see my conundrum here?!)

Anyone out there using this method successfully? And has anyone used it and resulted in DC?!

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If you've found this page in search of condoms that have been tried and tested by fellow Mumsnet users, you might find our guide to the best condoms useful. Hope this helps! MNHQ

[Pillowcase123]

Yes, you are being silly. Lots of children are born this way, my niece being one of them.

[EssentialHummus]

There’s a name for people who use this method - parents. Soz.

I wouldn’t do it unless you’re happy with the possibility of conceiving.

[OldEvilOwl]

Yes your being stupid. Don't do this unless your prepared to get pregnant

[UpShutTheFuck]

If, as you say, you are "really not ready to get pregnant" then you are being very silly. Do you understand how conceiving works?

[HelloThereMeHearties]

You know the answer to this, why did you bother posting?

[WorraLiberty]

I've been using the copper coil since my youngest was born.

He's 18 now and never any problems.

[BettyAndVeronica]

I used this method for 5 years in my 20s and got away with it fine. But the first time that 'pull out' didn't happen quickly enough I got pregnant. My DC is now 6

[MynephewR]

If you want to get pregnant then carry on as you are. 5 of my neices and nephews were conceived because their parents thought that pulling out would be fine.

I can't do hormonal contraception, it makes me crazy. I have the copper coil but before that we used condoms. Honestly the downsides of condoms are worth it, much better than an unwanted pregnancy imo.

[aceofharts]

@WorraLiberty

I've been using the copper coil since my youngest was born.

He's 18 now and never any problems.

Ah that's really interesting! I have been doing lots of reading on the copper coil plus lots of threads on here and seems it can be really problematic for UTIs/thrush? Glad to know there are others with more positive experiences!

[aceofharts]

@MynephewR

If you want to get pregnant then carry on as you are. 5 of my neices and nephews were conceived because their parents thought that pulling out would be fine.

I can't do hormonal contraception, it makes me crazy. I have the copper coil but before that we used condoms. Honestly the downsides of condoms are worth it, much better than an unwanted pregnancy imo.

How has the copper been for you? Really that's my only other option, much like you I'm put off hormonals for good now!

[Cam2020]

What about using one of those natural cycles apps?

[SnowFields]

It always carries a risk but less so if you time it to be several days after ovulation but many women aren’t able to pinpoint that well enough.

If you don’t want children though, it’s stupid. It’s fine if you are happy to have a child.

[SnowFields]

Would you put a gun to your head that has a bullet in and shoot if you know one of the times you pull the trigger is likely to kill you? Surely only if you didn’t mind the consequences either way.

[WorraLiberty]

Ah that's really interesting! I have been doing lots of reading on the copper coil plus lots of threads on here and seems it can be really problematic for UTIs/thrush? Glad to know there are others with more positive experiences!

The only very slight problem for the first year or so was a very slight bloody discharge, other than that it's been great.

[Danni91]

I feel like your totally ready and just making excuses - is unprotected sex really THAT good you would knowingly risk kids you say don't want yet?

Doubt it.

[picklemewalnuts]

Does no one use the cap anymore?

[picklemewalnuts]

Or rather, the diaphragm?

[PanamaPattie]

I see no issue with this. What could go wrong?

[WitchesNest]

Youngest DC was a pull out baby. I’ve since gone back to the extremely loathed injection. Requested my tubes be tied and was denied because of my age alone, the extensive list for it being done was completely ignored. I’m not bloody 30 so I don’t have any right to decide what’s best for my reproductive and mental health.

[TeenPlusTwenties]

Witches Just tell them you want to be a man...they'll let teenagers make themselves infertile if they say that.

[WitchesNest]

@TeenPlusTwenties I might genuinely consider that

[Catty1720]

Are you being serious? You don’t need full ejaculation to get pregnant so any pre cum can be enough. The nhs website tells you this. Give it a read!! If you aren’t ready for children then use condoms rather than having an unwanted pregnancy

[TimeToPullMyHairOut]

The baby in my tummy is a “pull out method” baby....
To be fair we have used pull out on and off for a few years between dc 1 and dc 2 and now this dc3 and this is the first time it’s failed us. However, for us we are ok with having a third. I definitely don’t want any more after this so I will never ever rely on the pull out method again. It is not reliable. End of. Sorry for tmi but we were enjoying ourselves just a a bit much and he pulled out a fraction too late. It only takes one sperm!

[Palavah]

You are being silly. You can reduce the risk, of course - track your cycles religiously (!) etc - but it's clearly not inflallible.

Have you tried using lube with condoms (on him before the condom goes on, and then on top of the condom)? Plus ribbed/dotted condoms? It does make a difference.

[DinosaurOfFire]

We use natural family planning (NFP) but thats not the pull out method. We abstain during my fertile period, so track ovulation symptoms, basal body temperature and cervical mucus. Googling will get you the method but basically, by avoiding sex around your fertile days you can avoid getting pregnant. Its basically the opposite of trying to conceive!