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How much to spend on Christmas for DS

18 replies

NoEffingWay · 22/11/2020 10:47

First year paying for it on my own, DS will get presents from ex-h so trying to be mindful but not miserly.

I have bought him a TV and a fire stick, and some pj's, bath bombs and chocolates from m&s and it's already cost £200! I don't really want to spend more, but it doesn't look like much together.

So, shall I buy a few more bits that he would like or stop there? It would be easy to keep buying but I am not rolling in cash and don't want to spoil him.

Its been a tough year with separation and divorce and DS has struggled sometimes with that plus lockdown. I want to make this one he remembers for the right reasons.

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WorraLiberty · 22/11/2020 10:54

I don't understand these threads that pop up in their droves every Christmas.

He's your child and it's your money. How you think internet strangers can answer this is beyond me.

I want to make this one he remembers for the right reasons

If the 'right reasons' mean material things to you and your child, then you probably need to do more shopping. If the 'right reasons' are having fun then clearly you don't.

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NoEffingWay · 22/11/2020 10:59

@WorraLiberty thank you for your helpful advice. Have been on mumsnet for years (10) and have never felt the need before but strangely enough this year I don't have a husband to bounce these ideas off of. I was hoping some 'internet strangers' with similar struggles night be able to offer their experiences.

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Pipandmum · 22/11/2020 11:03

A tv is a pretty big gift. There's a time when quality outweighs quantity.
My 17 year old is getting airpods, an online course that will get him a qualification in his field, a onesie and a shirt.
My daughter is getting some clothes, a Nintendo Switch game, sweets, and lego type kit for adults.
When young they'd get tons more inexpensive gifts. So now fewer, but better.

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Lobsterquadrille2 · 22/11/2020 11:06

Hi OP, I have always been a single parent and I don't think I have spent more than £100, maybe more when DD wanted something specifically. She's now 23. If her father had given presents, I guess I would have coordinated with him in case of double counting? DD isn't materialistic so it was more about experiences - she loves the whole ritual of getting out the box of decorations and putting them all in the same places - I started that when she was six and we moved back to the UK, and she asked me this week if we could get them out early. The poor cat has her antlers ready for their annual outing. The advent calendars. Signing the cards. Cheesy Christmas music. Make your own rituals and he'll remember those more than gifts.

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NoEffingWay · 22/11/2020 11:06

Thank you @Pipandmum. I think that might well be part of it, DS used to have lots of little things that added up to about the same money, but took a lot longer to open! I probably need to have a word with myself 😁.

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TheGriffle · 22/11/2020 11:09

How old is he?

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NoEffingWay · 22/11/2020 11:09

@TheGriffle almost 9

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TheGriffle · 22/11/2020 11:10

Still young then, I was just wondering if there were any toys he wanted if he was a young one, something he could play with. A board game for you both or similar.

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wendz86 · 22/11/2020 12:06

As he is 9 i would maybe just add something to play with but sounds plenty to me. Mine get presents at their dads too and their dad has a big family so i try not to go overboard.

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firesuntea · 22/11/2020 12:16

Hi OP. No direct experience but could you organise a Christmas cinema trip or theatre trip (if open) that he may like and would be memorable? Or maybe a board game you could play or a dvd especially for Christmas Eve or Boxing Day etc? Just some thoughts but the gifts you have sound great!

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Aroundtheworldin80moves · 22/11/2020 12:18

Will there be presents from other family too?
If he's asked or the TV and stick, I'm sure he will be very happy.

On the cost front... It's impossible to answer. All dependent on to our finances really.

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Livefortherain · 22/11/2020 12:25

My son is almost 9.. he's getting 2 of those 3D puzzles (he loves them), books, an xbox game, lego and stocking fillers like chocolate etc.

Does he like to read? My son is really into non-fiction so he's getting a few of the Eyewitness books (he specifically asked for trains, ww1, ww2 and the periodic table). Those books are around £6-8 each. He is also getting some chapter books which are around £4-6.

I know what you mean about not looking like much. But little stocking fillers help bulk it out.
Does he enjoy colouring or drawing? Or gaming? Board games?

Girls are SO much easier to buy for. My DD is 7 and I'm not struggling at all with her!

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NoEffingWay · 22/11/2020 12:44

He loves reading and craft so I was thinking of getting books, sketch pads, new pencils and pens, and a few puzzles-he loves the wooden ones which you have to put together and plays with some I have always. He loves DP's box of gemstones and rocks so was thinking of starting him off with his own treasure box.

Lot's of ideas, and thank you for all of your suggestions. I love to get him nice things, he has never asked for anything. His Christmas list said 'hugs and a new pack of gel pens' ♥️.

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movingonup20 · 22/11/2020 12:52

I'm spending about £60 on each of mine if that makes you feel better but we are taking all the kids to the zoo and for a meal as a treat (first Christmas post divorce and with dp)

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movingonup20 · 22/11/2020 12:53

Ps told exh he needed to buy dd1 a laptop which he has agreed to

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LuckyAmy1986 · 22/11/2020 14:12

I would add a few craft bits and books and I think that will be lovely

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triceratops12 · 22/11/2020 14:19

I think add some bits to 'play with'

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Blossomhill4 · 22/11/2020 14:25

I know it’s difficult now due to child Covid. Unless there’s an actual main present your DS would like I would not buy too much. Planned day outs is good or a nice weekend away rather lots of things kids don’t really need.

Also if his dad is buying too you could maybe find out his plans.

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