My feed
Premium

Please
or
to access all these features

Join the discussion and meet other Mumsnetters on our free online chat forum.

Chat

I need to get a grip. I wish my rapist would say sorry.

28 replies

Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:16

Realistically, he never will. I know that.

And that pisses me right off, as he is happily married, living quite the thing with his Dr wife and 3 boys.

I just wish he'd say sorry. It would mean so much.

How pathetic is that?

OP posts:
Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:17

I may or may not have had one too many wines 😫

OP posts:
Report
FTMF30 · 25/09/2020 20:18

You're not pathetic at all. He is pathetic. Do you not want to report the rape?

I'm sorry this happened to you 💐

Report
Codexdivinchi · 25/09/2020 20:19

It’s not pathetic.

Are you ok? Did you ever go to the police or speak to a councillor? Flowers

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:19

Years ago. 😟

OP posts:
Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:20

Nope.

Pisses me right off that I didn't.

But I didn't know how to then.


I'd love a sorry though 😞

That's all.

OP posts:
Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:21

And what pisses me off more Is that sexual assault remains so common.

OP posts:
Report
DrizzleandDamp · 25/09/2020 20:22

Oh bless you, that’s awful. I don’t think you really want a sorry though. If mine came close enough to say sorry I’d happily shoot him in the face.

Sorry would never ever change what they did.

Report
pepsirolla · 25/09/2020 20:23

To be sorry for what he did would mean he had empathy in which case he wouldn't be a rapist in the first place. Scum like that are only ever sorry for themselves if caught. Have you reported it? Have you sort help? You need to get yourself to a stronger better place so you will not care or think of him. I speak from experience and understand really feel for you. Please get help and talk to someoneFlowers

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:23

Maybe acknowledgement.

But yes. Think I'd like a sorry.

OP posts:
Report
Sicario · 25/09/2020 20:24

I am so sorry you went through that. Your feelings are completely justified and normal. What a complete bastard. Did you ever tell anyone about it?

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:24

The reality is. I am strong. Till I reminisce and want a sorry 😟

OP posts:
Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:25

Nope didn't say x

OP posts:
Report
gluteustothemaximus · 25/09/2020 20:25

I'm sorry OP, but it won't ever happen.

I have a similar thing, and the man is now married with 3 girls, and is a local MP (not around here, local elsewhere).

I have no evidence, and it was a long time ago. I wouldn't put myself through it, the disbelieving, the accusations, the heartache of putting my memories through that again.....I just can't.

He won't ever say sorry, as that would acknowledge his mistake.

I don't know what to say to help you. Just accepting it won't happen is a start. You can still be pissed off. And yes, sexual assault is still very common Sad

Report
gluteustothemaximus · 25/09/2020 20:26

The reality is. I am strong. Till I reminisce and want a sorry

Yep.

Report
madmumofteens · 25/09/2020 20:26

I hear you OP I am so sorry that this happened to you it really isn't fair that he got away with it but I totally understand why you didn't report it. My DD was raped and she reported it but ultimately couldn't face going to court meanwhile his life goes on has a new baby and a good job! 💐 stay strong I believe you x

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:33

Thanks

I'm just sad.

He stole so much Sad

OP posts:
Report
pepsirolla · 25/09/2020 20:33

You can still report historic rape and you never know there maybe other victims who have made statements and a case could be brought against him. It is terrible that he is a doctor too, the medical authorities should know I know it is difficult to get the strength to report. Speak to a rape crisis centre they are brilliant in my experience and can support you in whatever you decide to do and for as long as you need
Also don't assume he has a perfect life, it may be different in reality

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:33

And doesn't give one fuck 😟

OP posts:
Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:36

Perhaps I'm just being sombre.

But man does it piss me off how much sexual assault can set back a woman (or man), and the perpetrator can march on unawares...

OP posts:
Report
janetmendoza · 25/09/2020 20:36

He will never say sorry, because he will have convinced himself by now that he did nothing wrong and no rape took place. It is vanishingly rare for these people to accept personal responsibility.

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:38

You're right. He'll have convinced himself I was in the wrong.

Fucking. Slimy bastard.

That very good!

OP posts:
Report
madmumofteens · 25/09/2020 20:43

I saw first hand how it nearly destroyed my DD and affected our family I pray every day he pays for it I try so hard not let him take anything else from us. Please just stay strong and be kind to yourself. I believe one day karma will get him I hope your rapist gets his karma too

Report
Iwonder777 · 25/09/2020 20:45

I'm so sorry for your DD

Rape is a truly terrible thing.

I wish her only the best and send her the biggest, squishiest hug x

OP posts:
Report
JayAlfredPrufrock · 25/09/2020 20:47

So sorry OP.

I’d be tempted to get pissed and contact his wife.

Report
madmumofteens · 25/09/2020 20:48

Don't let him take anything else from you speak to someone in RL or vent on here ❤️ to you xx

Report
Please create an account

To comment on this thread you need to create a Mumsnet account.