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Anyone in here relocated say 3 hours away form family and friends, and do you regret it ?

(32 Posts)
Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 13:59:21

Or are you glad you did it

OP’s posts: |
Yukka Thu 24-Sep-20 14:13:06

Yes we moved 4 hours away. Both our families live in the same town. It depends on your reasons for going as to whether you regret it. We did it 12 years ago and don't regret it. Our quality of life is much better here than if we stayed. We have access to do more things that we enjoy every day on our doorstep rather than a drive away.

Visiting is a challenge as there are a lot of people to see when we go including old friends, but FaceTime/Skype etc I don't think we would necessarily spend more time together if we lived closer. Parents aren't so good at travelling to see us, but siblings with kids love coming in the summer or Christmas.

We agreed that if our families ever really needed us there then we would go back. Long term illness for example. It's difficult to envisage this as we're so settled now I'm not sure we would go back but we would at least ask the question and consider it seriously. We also have a child to think of what's best for them.

Going anywhere nice...?!

jackfruitz Thu 24-Sep-20 14:24:11

We’ve done it. Both me and DH have hobbies which means we easily make new friends. Family do visit but only really a couple of times a year which suits us but we are both very independent and never intended to move back to either of our hometowns. We’re now quite settled where we are now and both families are opposite ends of the country to us!

Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 14:27:35

Just always wanted for live by the sea, pretty much that simple

But I would miss family and friends
I know we would still see them visit them and hopefully they will visit us
But I guess it won’t be the same
I know we will make more friends though

My eldest is 13 and part of me thinks if we don’t go soon, we might not all end up going together
She is happy to move
My 6 year old will just get on with it, I would think

OP’s posts: |
Jaxhog Thu 24-Sep-20 14:30:31

All my family moves around so it's normal for us. We have a family WhatsApp group to share news and photos and all try to visit each other at least once a year. Those of us in the UK anyway. My best friends live all over the UK - most of us keep in touch via WhatsApp, Facetime and Facebook.

I can't imagine what living near my family would actually be like!

Yukka Thu 24-Sep-20 14:45:03

We live by the sea - you will always have people wanting to visit smile

There is nothing like going down the beach after school and work. Even in the winter, wetsuits if it's chilly or playing in the sand,, home for hot chocolate and pizza. In fact we usually get many warm sunny days in the winter till February. No coats needed.

Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 14:46:01

Is there a relocation section job on here ?
I can see a topic of living abroad but I can’t see relocating

Perhaps I just need some sort of kick to the arse to make us do it !

OP’s posts: |
Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 14:47:17

Yeah that’s true it would be moving to somewhere everyone I know loves to visit so I guess we won’t be short of visitors

How do you just do it though ?
Feel the fear but do it anyway ?

OP’s posts: |
Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 14:49:29

Yukka have you always lived by the sea ?
Even as a child I dreamed of living by the sea

OP’s posts: |
Yukka Thu 24-Sep-20 15:10:21

No - born and raised in the north west of England and moved south. I have Irish heritage and spent a lot of my childhood over there so if anything I was a country bumpkin. But being by the sea, it instantly calms you. We are very chilled people.

It is feel the fear and do it anyway. We simply said what's the worst that could happen? If it's not working or we're not happy then we move back. We fell in love with the area and the lifestyle it allowed at little cost. Going to the beach is free, but never tiresome. And naturally we got a dog...

We lined up work, and 4 weeks later moved. Rented a house for 6 yrs then bought. No kids then granted - it was easier.

We visit family 4-6 times a year with 4-6 various visits to us.

opinionatedfreak Thu 24-Sep-20 15:44:23

Yes.

I love where I live now. I moved her in early 2000s moved home for a job and stayed 5years but missed my adopted city so much I moved back.

It’s a bit awkward with to see family especially when bad stuff is going on (like my Grandmother’s final illness but we manage.

You only get one life.

Having said that I didn’t emigrate because of my family so I only partially practice what I preach.

fairydustandpixies Thu 24-Sep-20 15:46:13

I did just this two years ago. Moved alone, left adult sons, family and friends behind, didn't know the area or anyone here. Best decision ever! I love it here and have made some incredible new friends.

HattonsMustard Thu 24-Sep-20 16:00:06

As you have a 13 year old just be aware that GCSE content can be 3 years and most definitely 2 years so you will need to get them into school before year 10. Each school chooses different exam boards and teach things in no set order. It would make it harder to transition.

Maybe this will give you the push to move?

Have you always lived in the same area all your life? I have moved a few times, one of which was 3 hours away from family, we are now 1 hour away.

Bunnymumy Thu 24-Sep-20 16:07:29

I'm 4 hours away. And no.

Talk to my mum every night on the phone though.
And I've always been happy in my own company.

Bunnymumy Thu 24-Sep-20 16:08:03

*no I dont regret it.

Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 17:23:37

Yes I’m mindful she starts year 10 next sept, She said her ideal time to go would be start school there next sept
I said don’t you think that would be hard
Starting a new school right at the start of year ten
But she said she thinks that’s the best time to go
And that she’d rather start a new school in sept as all the other kids have had a natural break

She soad she’d rather live there than here

So I guess it go before gcse year ten begins
Or wait till she’s starting uni or something
But somethings telling me it will get harder for her to go later

I just want some sort of push someone Or something to make me do it

OP’s posts: |
Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 17:24:17

Fairy dust how did your family take it ?

OP’s posts: |
Lardlizard Thu 24-Sep-20 17:26:03

One thing I would consider regarding my dd is sell my house buy another but
use some of the money to send her to a private school for year 10 and 11
Not saying that’s better but if that gave us better choices regarding schools I would certainly consider that

OP’s posts: |
TheSeedsOfADream Thu 24-Sep-20 17:29:44

I moved away to university, then work, then abroad. I actually saw my Mum more living in Italy than I did Liverpool. I'd go for a couple of weekends a year from Liverpool, two days for Christmas etc. Once I was abroad I'd see her for weeks at a time.

Lardlizard Fri 25-Sep-20 07:29:49

I’ve always lived in the same ish area less then 30 mins drive to rest of family, yet not close enough to be real practical help
Like I couldn’t really ask a family member to do the school run if I was poorly or anything

OP’s posts: |
Valkadin Fri 25-Sep-20 09:21:09

Relocated twice for career moves. I wouldn’t just move somewhere because it’s pretty.

What my family would think of me moving never crossed my mind. They remain in the rural backwater we grew up in. Yes it’s very pretty where I grew up and my first move was to inner city Birmingham, also London and now in a market town. However their choice meant a life of work on minimum wage.

I did live by the sea, I do miss the sea but seaside towns can be utterly grim in the winter and then over run with tourists in the summer. Just remember your thoughts on living by the sea are all founded from memories of being on holiday.

Rigi Fri 25-Sep-20 09:27:07

I moved basically from one end of the UK to the other! It wasn't bad apart from the initial first couple of weeks, I keep in contact with people regularly on the phone and facetime.

Chipsahoy Fri 25-Sep-20 09:30:12

We are doing it! Moving three to four hrs from family from midlands to North Yorkshire. Can’t wait! We want to be less than an hour from the sea but also fairly close to dales. Looking at bedale up to Darlington way.

Life is full of regrets but regret going and then move back rather than regret never going at all!

Lackadaisically Fri 25-Sep-20 09:40:58

Yes twice. Once for uni where I was 2.5 hours from home and stayed there because I loved it. Visiting was fine, you see each other less often but for longer periods of time when you do see them so it balances out.

We then moved for a job, 5 hours from uni town and his family and 4 hours from my hometown and mine. Again it was fine, you make new friends and the friends that matter seeing them less often doesn't damage the friendship.

We did move back when we had kids though. But babies and toddlers have different needs than older kids. If we could afford the house prices we'd move back to uni town though. We really really loved it there!

hairychinsrus Fri 25-Sep-20 11:42:11

I'm so pleased I've seen this as we are looking at relocating from Hampshire to South Wales. It will be 3 hours away and we are doing it so that we can afford to send our DS to a decent private school as well as being close to the beaches/forests etc
Be really interesting to see others posts

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