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Reasons why my DS (13) should not stay at his girlfriends

(70 Posts)
TheOrville Wed 23-Sep-20 06:19:22

Just that really.
Allegedly girlfriends mum is okay with it.

I am not. Please give me additional reasons, so far I have
1) not appropriate
2) setting a precedent
3) not appropriate

OP’s posts: |
OverTheRainbow88 Wed 23-Sep-20 06:20:27

Too young

Sirzy Wed 23-Sep-20 06:20:56

He’s 13. That should be enough.

I would ask for the parents phone number. I wonder if they really have agreed

Aquicknamechange2019 Wed 23-Sep-20 06:25:12

He's 13. You've said no. End of.

Codexdivinchi Wed 23-Sep-20 06:34:25

Because you’ve said no.

Because young boys need to be protected just as much as young girls.

I’d also ring the parents too.

maddiemookins16mum Wed 23-Sep-20 06:50:47

Christ, when did 13 year olds start having boyfriends/girlfriends.

MinesAPintOfTea Wed 23-Sep-20 06:54:10

Why does he say he wants to?

Because if things go wrong it will be the middle of the night

Because unless he says he wants to stay because he wants sex, he needs protecting from being put in circumstances where it is expected. If he does say that, then he needs protecting from a decision he is too young to make.

You are the parent

PamDemic Wed 23-Sep-20 06:55:34

Because you've said no.

WoodenFox Wed 23-Sep-20 07:01:11


He's 13. You've said no. End of.

This, 100%

Toontown Wed 23-Sep-20 07:02:44

@maddiemookins16mum pretty certain Romeo and Juliet were 13 so I would hazard a guess and say for a long time!
A simple no is all that's needed.
But currently we are not allowed in other people's household so its illegal. There are also "one thing leads to another", possible pregnancy and statutory rape issues.

Disorganisedfish Wed 23-Sep-20 07:02:46

He’s 13! You said no!

Realise I’m repeating others here, but seriously - pull out the “because I said so” card here because you are the parent and it’s a ludicrous idea!

mummyof2lou Wed 23-Sep-20 07:04:13

Because he's 13!! No other reason required at all. He could get in all sorts of trouble if this all goes wrong. Shocking the girlfriends Mum thinks it's ok.

AlwaysLatte Wed 23-Sep-20 07:05:08

I would decide at what age that would be acceptable (not 13!) and then there's your reason right there. No more discussion.

Clovertoast Wed 23-Sep-20 07:07:42

13 !! My 17 year old dd has never even stayed anywhere!!!!
It's just a no. Followed by YOU ARE 13!!!
why does he even want to stay?

Effitall Wed 23-Sep-20 07:11:10

Because he is a child and needs protecting, even if he may not see it right now.

Somethingkindaoooo Wed 23-Sep-20 07:14:19

Agree- just because you said no.

Its potentially too grown up of a situation

MrsMcMuffins Wed 23-Sep-20 07:16:37

It’s a no from me. Not appropriate. They can spend time in the living room alone but supervised. Mine started bringing friends of opposite sex into their bedrooms past 16 and with door open to 17 when I left them to it.

caughtalightsneeze Wed 23-Sep-20 07:18:40

Because I say so would be my answer here.

Before I had children I swore I would never say that but that's because I was clueless. Sometimes it's fine to say that I'm the parent and I make the decisions and I don't have to justify them.

MikeUniformMike Wed 23-Sep-20 07:24:20

Unnecessary, might lead to behaviour that 13 yr olds shouldn't be getting up to (and possible consequences), and because you don't think it is appropriate.

It might be quite innocent, but it might create an opportunity for inappropriate behaviour.

CatteStreet Wed 23-Sep-20 07:28:48

He's 13. That should be the end of the discussion really.

ConcernedAboutWarrington Wed 23-Sep-20 07:38:47


Because you're 13. Because you could find yourself in a situation that you regret. Because 13 year old boys and girls have raging hormones and as your parent I have to protect you of the potential consequences of that.

Because you have plenty of opportunity to spend time with GF during the day / evenings without staying over.

Because you'll get the opportunity for all of this when you're older and better equipped to make these decisions for yourself.

Because I say so, and it's easier for you to say you're not allowed, than for you to say you don't want to, because that might be the case.

I think you should explain a little because your 13 year old can understand this.

alreadytaken Wed 23-Sep-20 07:41:25

If 13 year olds want to get up to inappropriate behaviour they are just as likely to do so in daytime.

Have you spoken to the other mother? I'd speak to her and see if she is alright with it and if so why.

Then have a talk with your son about the law and why it exists, respect for women and contraception.

FippertyGibbett Wed 23-Sep-20 07:45:49

Absolutely not !

UntamedWisteria Wed 23-Sep-20 07:48:21

assuming they will be in separate bedrooms I really don't see the problem here.

You need to speak to the other parents to ensure everyone's on the same page.

Browneyesbigbum Wed 23-Sep-20 07:54:09

He is 13 and a child - your decision.

Not the feckless parent of another 13 year old - does she realise that 13 years can and do have sex and can and do get pregnant....

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