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Children talking about sucking privates, would you bring it up with the mum?

(18 Posts)
Woeismethischristmas Mon 14-Sep-20 22:52:14

Two girls aged 8 came up to a 5 yo in the park after school and asked if she had sucked another child privates (a boy who is a good friend of hers also 5 ). She was playing with my 5yo who told me. Would you repeat this to her Mum? I know its a my dd said x said so and so but tbh its an awful thing to say to a 5yo and if it were my child I'd be asking the school to have a firm chat with the 8yos.

OP’s posts: |
bookmum08 Mon 14-Sep-20 22:55:05

Report to the safeguarding person at your school. They will know how to handle it.

Woeismethischristmas Mon 14-Sep-20 23:01:15

How do you know who the safeguarding person is? I do know the mum, in fact all the children and their mums, its certainly not anything that I've heard before. These are the kind of children who will come tell you if one of your kids uses bad language in the park so it was pretty shocking.

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OhYeahYouSuck Mon 14-Sep-20 23:03:28

That's a huge safeguarding issue. Report it to the school. Just ask for the safeguarding officer. It will probably be the Head or deputy.

Gooseysgirl Mon 14-Sep-20 23:04:59

Agree this is a safeguarding issue, contact the school and ask to speak with the safeguarding lead (likely to be a member of senior leadership team).

MiniMum97 Mon 14-Sep-20 23:05:11

Using inappropriate sexualised language is a sign of sexual abuse which is why you need to report it to the safeguarding lead. If you don't know who this is, just ask the receptionist at the school.

bookmum08 Mon 14-Sep-20 23:06:31

Yes you just need to contact the school and say "I need to speak to the safeguarding person urgently". You can ask your child's teacher, the TA, Receptionist, which ever staff member is on gate duty.

NightmareLoon Mon 14-Sep-20 23:07:30

Safeguarding lead will probably also be on the website - they have to post their safeguarding policy so check that.

Passtherioja Mon 14-Sep-20 23:14:36

Woeismethischristmas

How do you know who the safeguarding person is? I do know the mum, in fact all the children and their mums, its certainly not anything that I've heard before. These are the kind of children who will come tell you if one of your kids uses bad language in the park so it was pretty shocking.


The school has to publish its safeguarding policy on its website and the designated safeguarding lead (DSL) will be named on the policy. Failing that, ring the school office and tell them you would like to talk to the DSL as a matter of urgency.

Embracelife Mon 14-Sep-20 23:16:51

It s not "firm chat" it s a sensitive trained probing chat to find out where the 8 year old learned this

Woeismethischristmas Mon 14-Sep-20 23:16:56

Thanks for the advice, it didn't really register at the time but I can't get it out of my head this evening. I feel really uncomfortable with the idea of not doing anything so I will talk to the school tomorrow.

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MarriedtoDaveGrohl Mon 14-Sep-20 23:18:18

Yes it's very much not a normal conversation. Your instincts are right so well done flowers

Woeismethischristmas Mon 14-Sep-20 23:23:48

Ok firm chat is probably not the right thing to say, I think I was thinking more had they upset the 5yo rather than where they had picked it up.

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Pandacub7 Mon 14-Sep-20 23:25:01

As others have said, please report this to the safeguarding lead at the girls’ school. They may want to ask your DD what she heard, but she won’t be interrogated. It’s disturbing that 8 year old girls would know about this. The school may want to ask them about home life.

BF2748 Tue 15-Sep-20 00:08:29

There’s definite cause for concern to what the 8year olds are exposed to whether it be in person or online. Good luck with speaking to the school!

IAteAlltheAvocadoPears Tue 15-Sep-20 19:16:17

Potential safeguarding issue so yes I would mention it

HavelockVetinari Tue 15-Sep-20 19:19:18

An 8 year old shouldn't even know about that sort of thing - it's a big red flag for abuse, which is why you shouldn't talk to the parent - i agree with PP, the school safeguarding lead. Or you could call the NSPCC for help?

Suzi888 Tue 15-Sep-20 19:20:27

Horrified reading that! Yes, report.

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