Hi
Yesterday I got assaulted by my now ex boyfriend. I treated him for a meal out and we had a lovely night but we ended up disagreeing on something, I’ve told him to leave it as were enjoying our night but when we left the pub he assaulted me in the tiny street behind the pub. He pushed me onto the floor and grabbed me by the throat so I slapped him but he got me against another wall and started to strangle me, I couldn’t breathe at all and I could see on the corner of my eye a bouncer a few meters away who didn’t move but he was talking to a thingy on his ear. While he was strangling me about 5 or 6 men came to help me and I recognised one of the men who was a pub staff member as he served me drinks during the night . Those men were adamant I needed to come with them and away from my partner , one of them has mentioned seeing us on cctv this is how they came I’m guessing. I rang my boyfriends mum in hysterics asking her to pick me up I was in a state of absolute shock so I didn’t want to follow them and i insisted on telling them my boyfriend parents were on the way to pick us up .I know it does sound crazy that I left with him . He first apologised then started to push me again a few streets away saying it was my fault, that I ruined the night, made a scene in the street and that he would kill himself if I said anything so I started to walk away and I could hear him running to me so I’m guessing this was my instinct kicking and trying to survive but I pretended to be fine “ ok let’s get to your parents and get some sleep “ When we were in car both his parents were silent and I was just crying while my boyfriend was trying to hold my hand, sometimes nicely but sometimes putting pressure on it as to urge me not to cry in front of his parents. When we got home I went upstairs to fetch my bag as I wanted to go back to my flat ( we live together somewhere else ) he closed the door behind him in his bedroom and tried to tell me to stay and when I said no he put his hands on my neck again saying he won’t help me with the rent etc so his dad came and wrestled him on floor while my boyfriend was saying “ is this what you wanted , alright dad let me say bye to the c*nt ) I don’t know where his mum was. His dad drove me home, I gave most of his clothes and things in bag and told him I was done with it all. That was a shocking assault but sadly it wasn’t the first one. He used to be physically abusive in different ways ( pinning me to the bed and shout in my face, once spat on my face, grabbing me by arms which left bruises, driving dangerously with me in the car to scare me, etc ) one particular bad one was while we were on lockdown so I couldn’t go to work, he wrestled me on the floor and I must have dissociated myself from the situation because I can’t remember exactly what happened, I know he didn’t punch me or slapped me I only remember being on the floor and it lasted only a few seconds. The day after I had two black eyes and marks on my forehead and a big lump on my temple and he prevented me to get seen by a doctor ( I was worried as it was a head injury ) and closed all curtains for 2 weeks to make sure I couldn’t be seen. I took pictures and told his parents ( mine live abroad ) and they said they had to get him sectioned before because he has mental health issues. It it quite clear he suffers from some kind of disorder but it’s not an excuse for all the things he’s done and I know you’re wondering why I stayed. I can only say I loved him blindly, and I wasn’t being realistic about the situation and was a hopeful naive woman . What I’m saying is, his parents knew he assaulted me and I’m not sure if they realise the severity of it because it’s their son or don’t want to face the reality. His dad told me yesterday to block my ex and that I deserved better, he seemed lost for words I don’t know . My friends want me to get the police involved but I’m terrified and I it’s not that I want to protect my ex, but sadly I have to process what happened while grieving my relationship and the whole lie it was and I cannot shut down my feelings yet about him so needless to say I am a mess and I don’t feel like I can deal with the police on top of it all. If anyone been in a similar situation I would please ask for your advice . Thank you
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I have just left an abusive relationship. My friends are wanting me to get the police involved but I don’t want to. What should I do?
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Lozbreizh · 30/08/2020 17:45
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ivfdreaming ·
30/08/2020 18:05
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30/08/2020 18:55
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