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Different opinions to covid and friendships

(5 Posts)
deffonamechange Fri 21-Aug-20 11:42:57

this is getting me down. My bff who I always felt very close to has totally different attitude and views to covid than me. Its upsetting me and am finding it quite offensive.

In recent weeks I've been of the frame of mind of thinking everyone just needs to do what they feel comfortable with and we should respect that. I've got some friends who are very anxious about it and being v careful with social distancing and other friends who are very laid back and not worrying. I can cope and respect them all. I think i am somewhere in the middle.

However my bff believes that its all made up. That covid is no worse than flu and its all a big conspiracy and everyone is lying!

I work in NHS. I am front line worker. March and April were absolutely heartbreaking. I have lists of patients who have died. I have colleagues who have been in intensive care. I know people in my personal life who have died and been terribly ill with it. Im also seeing first hand the horrendous impact it is having on families of patients in hospital and mental health of my own family who have health anxiety issues.

Hearing my friend constantly say its not that bad and 'well I don't know anyone who has had it' is so offensive. Apart from anything its like she is a cussing me of lying.

Im not a confrontational person. I am opposite . Will do anything to avoid conflict.
I feel a bit like it's politics, just don't discuss it if you don't agree. But somehow this seems like a bigger deal.

Anyone else having these kind of struggles with people they like/love?

OP’s posts: |
BillywilliamV Fri 21-Aug-20 11:49:20

Your friend is disrespectful, you need to distance yourself from her, at least temporarily.
I am relaxed about Covid, but my friend is a nurse and I believe she is suffering from PTSD, following the deaths on her ward.
I would never belittle her experience or efforts in such a heartless and (frankly) rude fashion.

Rhine Fri 21-Aug-20 12:04:04

I’m taking a zero tolerance approach to this. Anyone who exposes that they are a Covid denier, an anti masker or an anti vaccer is promptly blocked o social media.

deffonamechange Fri 21-Aug-20 14:15:19

I know. I just can't believe she is one of these people who say 'not happened to anyone I know therefore its not true sad

OP’s posts: |
peonyblossom Fri 21-Aug-20 14:24:35

Its really hard isn't it. I can't imagine what you've been through and your friend is offensive given the circumstances!

We're having differing opinions too. I have a close group of 5 friends (me incl). I'm of the view that there is no need to panic madly, given that we're all healthy, but that we should all be doing our bit and be being sensible.

My friends (incidentally one of whom is a front line NHS worker!) feel differently to me, evidently. We've got the NHS worker, a teacher, and a carer in our group - all of whom you'd expect to be being quite cautious.

They're all business as usual. Meeting up in houses (them and their children, four households - 4 adults and 11 children!) not socially distancing with each other or family only strangers. Mixing in houses with other friends and their children.

We're not doing any of that. Garden meet ups, fine, but no one is houses unless it's out 1 household plus the other person in our bubble. SD wherever we can.

I don't judge others for having a different view to me but I do feel a bit miffed that I can't mix with them because I know they won't SD from me or my children and the moment it gets a bit breezy outside then the meet up will move indoors.

DH and I were invited to a birthday gathering a few weeks back in a pub for the wife of one of his friends. We didn't go, because we knew what it'd be like. Sure enough, next day pictures emerge on SM of probably 10 household together in a pub, not a whiff of SD amongst them. In fact quite the opposite, all hugging/selfie taking etc.

Lucky we're in an area with low rates atm.

Still, we can only control our own actions. COVID has really brought out the best and worst in people, I've found it quite eye opening in general how lots of people have behaved.

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