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Anyone here who didn't want kids at 35, and changed their mind?

(6 Posts)
Sa218 Fri 24-Jul-20 13:44:43

As the title says.

I'm 35 and pretty sure I don't want kids. I really can't imagine feeling differently in the next five years, but accept that this may happen. Has anyone been similar and suddenly changed their mind after 35?

For context, I've never really wanted kids but just assumed I'd be ready for them in my mid thirties.

I've been married 5 years. DH was never bothered but now leaning towards yes.

OP’s posts: |
Inaquandry19 Fri 24-Jul-20 13:55:18

I was similar at 30, probably till 33 almost certain I was never having children. I had dc at 35.

toomanypillows Fri 24-Jul-20 13:57:31

I never really wanted children - it just wasn't something that we ever "got round to" but then I went to see my GP for something unrelated (I was 32) and he told me that I was infertile. Dropped it on me like I should have known about it

Suddenly being faced with the very real fact that my choice was no longer really my choice, DH and I had to have very serious discussions about whether or not we wanted fertility treatment and if we did, then we had to start pretty much straight away.
We still didn't really want children to start with, but had to seriously consider whether or not we might ever change our minds and if there was a possibility that we might, then we had to address that earlier.

In the end we chose not to have fertility treatment but to adopt. DS and DD later, I am very very glad I found out I was infertile 😁

Good luck with your choices. I don't know if I would ever have changed my mind without being threatened with the finality of "what will your life look like without children and you need to make a decision NOW" conundrum.

But I love being a parent. Love it.

Dinosauratemydaffodils Fri 24-Jul-20 13:59:23

Me. Ended up having 1 at 37 and 1 at 40.

elliemcx Fri 24-Jul-20 14:05:31

Yes me, I never imagined having children at 35, not that I detested the idea, just not something I imagined for myself at all, but then some things happened in my life that made me reevaluate everything and I changed my mind about two and a half years later and realised it was something I wanted. I just had a baby five weeks ago and just turned 39 at the end of June, and it's great!

BighouseLittlemouse Fri 24-Jul-20 14:24:37

Me - my then DH changed his mind and became more
pro having DC. So I ended up with 2.

I love them very very much but am still not sure it was the right decision for me ( and DH is now an ex!). I wouldn’t say I was a brilliant parent - although I’m much better now they are a bit older.

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