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Talk me through this - male on placement with brownies

(697 Posts)
nevernotstruggling Fri 28-Feb-20 17:45:52

The dds have been to the same brownie unit for around 4 years (dd1 waiting to move up to guides). I know the leaders quite well and there has been one staff changeover in that time. The communication with parents has been excellent. I have felt safe letting the dds go on sleepovers knowing that I know all the adults involved. It's actually been brilliant in terms of safeguarding. No surprises or anything parents haven't been informed of. The dds love it. Dd2 is thriving there because it's a small closed group where she feels safe and familiar.

I dropped the dds off this week and a man came up to dd1 touches her shoulder and said 'you're it' I said to brown owl - who is that?? She replied oh it's Dave (not his name obvs). Me - who is Dave??? BO - he's on work placement (something about youth work) . Me - Er is he DBS checked?? BO- yes. Me- Brownies is a girls group!! BO - we have dads helping! No they don't. Not once the whole time we have attended.

Apparently Dave will be there for 4 weeks.

My reaction has been negative. I'm quite annoyed there was no warning of Dave jointing the unit. There have never been 'work placements' before. I think it was be something to do with the church though.

I think parents should have been told. They use a private Facebook group to keep in touch with parents and this works really well so I'm a bit baffled by the surprise!

Janedoe82 Fri 28-Feb-20 17:48:34

Why don’t you volunteer to run it then you can make sure Dave is above board 😉

Sirzy Fri 28-Feb-20 17:50:34

Are you told about every volunteer there?

He is there for 4 weeks youth work experience, he is DBS and is presumably well aware and following the brownies safeguarding policy.

jjjnnnnnrrssss Fri 28-Feb-20 17:50:46

There might not be dad volunteers in your girlguiding group but they do exist and are encouraged. It's 4 weeks. He's background checked. biscuit

nevernotstruggling Fri 28-Feb-20 17:51:15

@Sirzy there have never been any before.

ShesGotBetteDavisEyes Fri 28-Feb-20 17:52:09

Tbh it would make me a bit uncomfortable too - I’d question why Dave wants to be there (unless he is a dad of one of the brownies).

Then again dd goes to a girls school and they have male teachers so....

PotteringAlong Fri 28-Feb-20 17:52:38

Really?! What’s your concern about what Dave is going to get up to in the next 3 brownie meetings?

Lazydaisydaydream Fri 28-Feb-20 17:52:41

I’ve been a leader in brownie packs where dads have helped run it. I don't think it's that unusual.

Also if he's not being left alone with the children (which he wouldn't be During a meeting) he doesn't need to be DBS checked and surely there's no issue?

Janedoe82 Fri 28-Feb-20 17:52:54

They are a positive thing- some girls may not have many good male role models and this gives them an opportunity to see what a man should be like. Wise up.

nevernotstruggling Fri 28-Feb-20 17:54:03

For clarity I don't assume Dave is a risk.

I'm just a bit shocked parents weren't told.

QueenArseClangers Fri 28-Feb-20 17:54:16

The whole idea of the Girlguiding movement is to provide girl only spaces so having a bloke there seems to defeat the point!

nevernotstruggling Fri 28-Feb-20 17:54:57

@QueenArseClangers yes!!!!!

BookMeOnTheSudExpress Fri 28-Feb-20 17:55:19

Do you keep your daughters away from male teachers?
Question why they went into teaching?
Swimming instructors?
Women who run Cubs?

You're being ridiculous.

Runmybathforme Fri 28-Feb-20 17:55:33

What on earth are you worried about ? You need to get a grip. He’s DSB checked isn’t he ? It’s great that the girls will have that male influence for a short while.

Panicmode1 Fri 28-Feb-20 17:56:46

Perhaps he's a single dad who wants to volunteer with an organisation that his daughter benefits from? What do you think he's going to do in a room full of children with other leaders there?

BackforGood Fri 28-Feb-20 17:56:59

Just because there don't happen to have been any during your time with this one pack, doesn't mean it doesn't happen.

Does Brown Owl runall helpers past all the parents 'for approval' before they offer her some support ? hmm

If you trust BO and the Guide Association, then you will know he will have had all the proper checks and done all the Safeguarding training necessary (almost certainly 2 or 3 times if he is a Youth Worker, and on placement with the Church).

Can't understand why this would bother you.

nevernotstruggling Fri 28-Feb-20 17:58:21

* t’s great that the girls will have that male influence for a short while.*

That's a joke right

PlanDeRaccordement Fri 28-Feb-20 17:58:23

You shouldn’t have to be a dad to want to work with children of either sex. It’s the gender stereotypes you’ve been fed your whole life that are making you paranoid.

BookMeOnTheSudExpress Fri 28-Feb-20 17:59:14

Actually BP started the girl guides so girls could do girly things like learn how to housekeep.
Nothing feminist or safe space about the Guides original tenets. It was about keeping females in their place.

SummerHouse Fri 28-Feb-20 18:00:33

It's really the same risk as if he volunteered with cubs.

user1958532689654 Fri 28-Feb-20 18:00:35

Would you object to a dad helping for four weeks to teach a skill for a badge, for example?

RhymingRabbit3 Fri 28-Feb-20 18:00:39

Males over 18 are allowed to volunteer as a unit helper but are not allowed to run a unit, take the promise or do the leadership qualifications.

I dont really understand what you think is going to happen here. He wont be left with Brownies alone, as would none of the other unit helpers, and he would be DBS checked and required to complete the safe space safeguarding training, the same as any female volunteer. If you think he is abusive or a paedophile (based on zero evidence apart from his sex) then surely you would be equally concerned about a female volunteer on a placement?

If they go on a residential (which sound unlikely as he is only there a few weeks) males have to have separate sleeping and bathroom facilities to all female member.

TrippingOnSunshine Fri 28-Feb-20 18:01:07

You are being really out of order. What do you imagine Dave is going to get up to? Just because he's a bloke he's obviously a sexual predator. That could be my dad/husband/brother/son you're talking about. So do you think male gynacologists/teachers/lifeguards are well suspect too.

BookMeOnTheSudExpress Fri 28-Feb-20 18:02:24

And you do know the kids' own father is about a million per cent more likely to abuse them than Dave, right?

RhymingRabbit3 Fri 28-Feb-20 18:03:03

P.s. we have had males come in to Brownies to do first aid training or presentations before. Should I have warned the parents that there would be a male first aid trainer in our group for 2 weeks?

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