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Friend. Ghost, maintain or something else?

(3 Posts)
Revealall Fri 14-Feb-20 20:36:15

I have a good friend I met about 10 years ago. We have a riot, been on holiday together etc however I’m not one of her very best friends.
She has a track record of being a bit self serving . Takes the piss at work, every relationship a drama, will eat more than her share at a buffet, will do you a favour as long as it doesn’t put her out. Not bad but always her first.
So this us the first year we haven’t swapped Christmas presents or my birthday.. She always texting we must meet at hers due to her limitations ( illness, diet, work) but she never answered when I asked her for a night that suited. .Now she’s sending messages saying she’d like to come over. But as of the last two weeks hasn’t.
However she has also posted nights out with other mates. Granted they live miles away do require planning which is easier than telling someone closer when you’re free.
So basically she’s great to be around when we go out ( she’ll get the best table, blokes love her confidence) but I’m not bothered if the friendship drifts as she takes more than she gives..

So what now? Just go round anyway? Carry on sort of vaguely pretending we’ll meet or gently fade her out by not replying. I’ve never had a friend that is “so near and yet so far”’ as normally you just drift apart without fuss.

stayingontherail Sat 15-Feb-20 13:42:13

If you really want to see her then invite her to something specific on a specific day/time and see if that changes anything. If she really wanted to see you she would. If you’re not that bothered about seeing her then I’d say continue doing what you’re doing and gradually fade her out.

Lifeisabeach09 Sat 15-Feb-20 13:48:10

I wouldn't ghost her.
Leave the ball in her court and when she messages you, be non-committal. Let things fade out naturally.

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