Advanced search

Shittest thing someone has ever done to you

(114 Posts)
madcatladyforever Wed 16-Oct-19 19:00:45

Well probably not the shittiest but some people have such low social skills you wonder how they get through life.
I was in labour in hospital with DS and exH got a phonecall from one of his university friends a woman called Louise, I knew her, she was an idiot so I didn't maintain contact.
ExH took the call and told her I was having the baby and she said can I stay at yours tonight as I'm in the area and haven't got anywhere to say.
Of course the idiot said oh ok instead of it's not convenient today.
Anyway off he went to pick her up from the station and didn't drop her off at our house he brought to her to the fecking hospital.
There I was in labour in agony having been induced and they are on the labour ward asking me stupid questions and talking about university.
Finally I said can you please fuck off now Louise as I'm clearly not in the mood for your banal chit chat and I just want to be alone with my husband for obvious reasons, she started crying and exH said look you've upset her now and they both went off only for him to reappear 24 hours later after the birth to tell me off for being so nasty to her that she had gone back home again [:-s]
I mentioned that he now and father and would he like to see his son, he took a look and pissed off again.
Not surprisingly we divorced very shortly after.

madcatladyforever Wed 16-Oct-19 19:02:00

That was 37 years ago but I still find it astonishing to this day.

EggysMom Wed 16-Oct-19 19:03:58

Reported me for a security breach which resulted in a full disciplinary investigation at work, one of the most stressful periods of my life. I was exonerated. What she'd seen me do on the computer, was my actual job. She just didn't know what my job was, and hadn't bothered to find out.

PatMustardsBigTool Wed 16-Oct-19 19:04:27

Speechless at that! What a prick. Well, both of them, actually!

Itsfineactually Wed 16-Oct-19 19:04:40

What a wanker

usersouthcoast Wed 16-Oct-19 19:09:47

My best friend and bridesmaid kissed my fiancé shortly after we got engaged.
I haven't spoken to her in years and called off the wedding months later. Lucky escape!

Autumnchill Wed 16-Oct-19 19:11:11

Went into someone's unlocked computer at work and onto the company internet and posted that I was stealing petty cash. I had no access to the petty cash tin, didn't even work in that department so everyone knew it was bullshit. She went onto write other things about other people such as when she didn't get a new position that it was obvious how the other person had got the job. Couldn't definitely point the finger but elimination narrowed it down to her. She left soon after. Very bizarre

LightandShadowsByTurn Wed 16-Oct-19 19:20:31

Found my best friend, at the time, in bed with my supposed boyfriend. Walk out her flat, never spoke to either of them again.

Craf7azE Wed 16-Oct-19 19:22:08

My child was in a summer camp with her cousins. They spent the week hanging out having fun. On the last day dropped my daughter off. spent the day with my sis . Headed down to pick up my daughter and sis husband there. Out come kids & husband announces he taking his kids (my nephews) and their friends to soft play. My daughter couldn't understand why she wasn't invited. Couldn't believe she would do that to her niece or spend the whole day with me & not mention her plans. Was fuming

NerdyCurvyInkedandPervy Wed 16-Oct-19 19:26:05

Married me without telling me he was a paedophile. I found out 28 days later but had to wait for a year and a day before i could apply for a divorce.

user1471453601 Wed 16-Oct-19 19:27:31

This might seem minor but it has a major affect on my mental health. I was a manager of a high profile project. I came into work one day to be pulled aside by my line manager. Someone who worked for me had been to see my line manager and requested an immediate move from my team to anywhere else.

Line manager asked what I wanted to do. My main concern was the mental health of the person who had worked for me until this point, so I agreed that the person must leave if she felt so uncomfortable on the team.

I was left in no doubt that the person concerned, and My Line manager knew I was the reason for the leavers unhappiness..

My Line manager, and the person who left, refused to tell me what it I had done to provoke such a reaction from the person who left.

Over ten years later, I still go over every transaction between me and the leaver, trying to figure out what I said or did.

I hope leaver is on this site, and finally feels able to.tell me what on earth happened

SleepyKat Wed 16-Oct-19 19:34:43

My now ex left me while I was at work with no sign or warning. I came home to find he’d cleared his stuff and left me a note. He did it to me 3 times in total as he’d come back and say he was sorry and then did it again. After the 3rd time I saw the light and refused to let him back again (he did try).

SleepyKat Wed 16-Oct-19 19:37:57

@matcatkadyforever. That’s unbelievable, had he shown signs of being an arse before? Did he go on to be an ok dad to his DS after the divorce?

handbagsatdawn33 Wed 16-Oct-19 19:38:02

2 friends at our house (H&W). Wife brags about having screwed my (D)H, I yelled & threatened her.

She ran, hotly pursued by her angry DH.

My DH then said I was very rude to our guests

stillcausestears Wed 16-Oct-19 19:38:46

nc for this.
Someone made a malicious allegation to social services about me. It was fully investigated and the process was over fairly quickly (SW was lovely and allegations deemed unfounded and malicious).
However, I developed ptsd and became depressed as a result. I’m a lot better now but still very jumpy (especially if someone knocks on the door or I have an unknown call on my phone) and distrustful of people. I was happy and sociable person before but now I struggle socially in new situations and my self esteem had plummeted.
It’s taken some of the joy out of being a mum and that breaks my heart.

BearFoxBear Wed 16-Oct-19 19:51:55

One of my best friends brought a new (needy as fuck) woman into our very close friend group. I didn't fawn over her enough apparently (I'm a married mother with a full on career, no time for bullshit drama), so she went for me. Physically attacked me outside a bar, ran inside crying and told everyone that I attacked her, and some of them believed her. She'd been planting the seeds of doubt for a while apparently.

5 years later the whole friend group has crumbled after almost 20 years and she even fell out with the original friend who brought her in.

Utterly self-centered, needy bitch.

Crunchymum Wed 16-Oct-19 19:54:38

Wow mine pales into insignificance to the OP's but it was pretty crap.

Has a LDR with a lovely guy I met whilst I did a summer abroad (he was on holiday but came out a few more times to see me during the 3 months I was there). Continued LDR when I got back for a year or so then he moved to London [his choice]. He got a job, flat share, started college. He completely pursued me and was exemplary in his behaviour and morals.

We had a lovely 6 months as a proper couple, were looking at flats and had a 2 week "dream holiday" booked and paid for. All very idyllic.

One day - out of the blue - I get a call from him, he is on the train back home.... FOR GOOD. He hated London / it wasn't me / he missed his family. Told me he'd bagged up my stuff and I could collect it from his flatmate shock

Then he turned his phone off (or binned it??) and that was that. This was before the days of FB / WhatsApp / smartphones.

All I had was his parents address and home phone number (which to my shame I did call looking for him, to be told by his lovely mother that he had "moved on"). Debated flying up to put the fucker on the spot but it wouldn't have helped. Of course the holiday had been on my CC and had to be missed as he fucked off literally 2 weeks before and I couldn't change it.

Still fucks me off best part of 2 decades later!!! What a spineless prick.

crosser62 Wed 16-Oct-19 20:05:47

23 years employed in the job of my dreams. I absolutely loved my job and was fucking good at it.
10 years trying, 7 miscarriages I finally had my long awaited healthy baby.
Working out the childcare costs for my 9-6pm daily job was over £700 per month.
We just couldn’t afford it.
Newish manager, who I approached about changing to shifts, still full time.
She refused. Told me that my job was office hours. I told her my financial issue, she refused.
I had to hand in my notice and leave.

That was the shittyest thing anyone has ever done to me.
6 years on I still have not recovered professionally.

WatchingFromTheWings Wed 16-Oct-19 20:07:47

My 'D'M made a series of false allegations about me to the police. Second time round they twigged she was lying but came to speak to me anyway. She got a telling off for that. 12 months later she makes false allegations to the police about someone else. Gets another telling off. Been NC with the witch since the first allegation.

catswhiskers15 Wed 16-Oct-19 20:21:00

SIL was having an argument with hubby and decided to throw the loss of our baby at us.
We still don't speak to her to this day.

Jayaywhynot Wed 16-Oct-19 20:24:26

Bullied for approx 2 years by my own sister and her then husband, not speaking, telling lies to anyone who'd listen, her husband was physically abusive on several occasions, basically made my life miserable, we all worked in the same place too. My family turned a blind eye, my mum and other sisters. I was basically ostracized from family events. Eventually they broke up and she pretended it had never happened, refused to discuss it etc. It had a profound effect on my mental well being as well as letting me know that my position in the family was tenuous. I was 40 yrs old at the time. They divorced and she has lent on me ever since, constantly needing things like money, she seems to think it's my duty to do / give what she desires. Her demands are endless, never pays anything back as shes on benefits. Final straw, did her yet another favour at the weekend, apparently I moaned about it so she put a post on FB to shame me. Never again, I'm do done

Fairylea Wed 16-Oct-19 20:27:23

Ex dh going to stay with his mum in London for the weekend which wasn’t unusual as we lived a fair way away and he’d often visit alone as we both worked conflicting shifts... and whilst he was there having an affair with an ex. Lovely. He eventually left me for her.

darkriver19886 Wed 16-Oct-19 20:34:05

I am trying to make a choice of which one of the many shitty things the woman who gave birth to me has done. Its hard to pick out of all the crap

I was 17 when I reported my abuser to the police, she called me a liar and we didnt speak for at least 4 years. She split up with him at one point so I thought we could talk to each other and then about 7 years ago I get a phone call from who her out the blue.

Her: Hello, guess what I got some amazing news. I am getting married.
Me: confused as she had been single as far as aware. Oh, Who to?
Her: Who do you think?
Me: Oh.
Her: Well I was wondering whether you would like to be a bridesmaid?
Me: Are you fucking kidding me? No way.
Her: But why?

As punishment, she refused to come to my wedding because he wasn't invited.

Unbelievably it took me seven years to finally go NC

DisneyMadeMeDoIt Wed 16-Oct-19 20:37:22

DH, for taking advantage of our wonderfully romantic honeymoon to impregnate me.
I’ve had HG (and every other sodding side effect) for the past 16 weeks.

- Not sure I’ll ever forgive him 😬😭

wineconnoisseur Wed 16-Oct-19 20:38:53

I had been seeing a guy for a couple months, it was beginning to get more serious (let's call him James) so I had invited my friend (we'll call her Sarah) to come with me to meet James in town. I was going to meet Sarah at her house and then walk together to town to meet him. Sarah had never met james nor spoke to him before 🤔. I got to Sarah's house and she wasn't home. I tried ringing her for ages and she finally answered. Turns out she was in town already with James! She had gone and messaged him on Facebook and arranged to meet him on her own behind my back 😐 I walked to town to meet them, very confused at this point. When I got there they were acting all weird and I was fuming and made it very known. I ended up leaving them there together and they ended up being in a relationship for years after that..

Bargebill19 Wed 16-Oct-19 20:49:21

My mother told me the reason I had five miscarriage in a row, was because I wasn’t married to my partner.
We don’t have children, 30 years later my partner and I are still together, not married.
The witch died alone.

username578999 Wed 16-Oct-19 21:03:52

My NDN hated me still does , think because I told her darling shit son off for throwing a ball at my window . Anyway lots of intimidation followed which I admit I reacted to basically telling her where to go . Anyway one day her dh spoke to my dh who was very timid and said I said something about her ds eyes apparently he'd had a eye operation not long ago not that I knew about that nor did I know anything about his eyes so why would I comment on the little sods eyes . It infuriated me I hate liars and that they would make something up that I said about a child.
Also my dad we are nc told lies about my in-laws they are basically the nicest people you could meet and because he can't handle that he has no control over me will lie and what disappoints me more he knows the trouble I had my NDN but he's so much worse also has sent the nastiest messages to me things like I'm the devil .hmm

Aposterhasnoname Wed 16-Oct-19 21:04:35

First husband left me in a lot of debt, and took everything we owned, I was in a low paid job at the time. I struggled and scrimped to afford to rent a little house then spent a couple of years gradually decorating and furnishing it. I managed to pay my debts off and although I struggled, I was managing.

Had been seeing a bloke for around 18 months and he begged me to move in with him. Literally begged. He bought a lovely house, which needed some work so he moved in with me while it was being done. All his money was going on the house so I pretty much supported him. At one point he lost his job, and was terrified of losing his home. I told him not to worry, that while ever I had a home, he did too.

After more begging I agreed to move in with him when the house was done. We booked our wedding and I bought my wedding dress and arranged a huge hen party. I took out a loan for this, but it wasn’t a problem as we were having all new things for the new house, so I was gradually selling my furniture.

Five weeks after I moved in, after giving up my home, selling or giving away everything I owned and taking out a loan to pay for the wedding he announced he didn't love me anymore as I was fat. He wanted “space’ and chucked me onto the streets that same day.

I’d worked my arse off for two years to get back on my feet, most of which he watched me do, and he sent me back to square one in just five weeks.

Actually the worst part is that there wasn’t even another woman as such. He’d got a new job with a prestigious company and decided that he needed a better girlfriend to fit in with his new mates, and needed to be free to go out and find one.

BrassTactical Wed 16-Oct-19 21:11:16

Best friend (I thought) told my (now ex DH) everything I had told her during a tricky part of my marriage and then convinced me he was mentally ill, a danger to my children and only knew things he couldn’t have known as he had set up bugs, trackers and cameras in my home. Sent me absolutely into mental breakdown.

Found out later they were having an emotional affair.

He’s told me since if I apologise to her for being angry she’ll be my friend again. I haven’t funnily enough.

LightandShadowsByTurn Wed 16-Oct-19 21:30:28

* Aposterhasnoname*

What a total cunt

MangoSalsa Wed 16-Oct-19 21:34:24

My dad got remarried on my 13th birthday and sent me a bit of cake through the post.

He’d been out of my life for years and went bankrupt in order to avoid child maintenance/divorce settlement (whilst hiding money with his family).

All round top bloke!

RueCambon Wed 16-Oct-19 21:35:03


MangoSalsa Wed 16-Oct-19 21:36:12

Oh, and his bankruptcy made me and my mum homeless (I try to forget that).

Aposterhasnoname Wed 16-Oct-19 21:40:59


Yes, he was.

Lisette1940 Wed 16-Oct-19 21:45:19

My parents have a bad marriage but back each other up when not fighting. They were staying with us when I had to put boundaries up about their poor behaviour in our home. They decided to pack up, walk out and fly home. But not before walking past me to shake my husband's hand one after the other (husband tried to resist) and then stomping out. Said not a word to me nor did they look at me. That was almost four years ago. Not heard from them since.

Lisette1940 Wed 16-Oct-19 21:47:53

Blissful peace without them ☺️

quincejamplease Wed 16-Oct-19 21:54:20

Trafficked me.

StCharlotte Wed 16-Oct-19 21:54:42

My sister kindly drove across-country to take me for a scan when my (only) pregnancy ended in a miscarriage after three years TTC. Out of gratitude I took her for lunch, during which she announced her daughter's third pregnancy. "It wasn't planned", like that made it better.

She was a funny old stick and to this day I don't know if she was being malicious. But it was certainly shitty.

Spied Wed 16-Oct-19 21:55:32

Years ago ( DC are 10&8 now) DC's nursery accused me of turning up to pick up DC DRUNK and refused to allow me to take my DC home ( they called dp who had to leave work). We we're astounded. We we're also looking for another nursery at the time too as we weren't very keen on some of the staff and didn't think it was what we wanted for our dc.
As a result a family worker came to visit us at home. I was absolutely mortified.
Family worker was happy my children were safe and very well looked after.
No idea where the drunk idea came from.
I used to plan in my head how I would get my revenge. Turns out I didn't need to as not long after the place was investigated and temporarily closed due to safety breeches and amendments.
( I often wonder who raised concernshmm)

StCharlotte Wed 16-Oct-19 21:55:40


shock ??

TigerJoy Wed 16-Oct-19 22:14:22

Omg @madcatlady that is truly bananas! Were they having an affair or was it really just poor social skills?

Hugs to everyone that's posted here

Here's a silly one - when I was 15 I really fancied a boy at school - had a massive crush on him and we were friends too, so I knew him pretty well. Told all to my best friend, talked about him for weeks. She didn't really know him well. Anyway come valentine's day our school had a stupid card thing and I spent ages talking to said best friend about whether I should send him something - she said no, find the right time to talk to him but don't do it before Valentine's day or he'll get spooked, think you want to be his girlfriend for v day, leave it til after. Then she went and sent him a bloody card asking him out! And they went out for months! And she acted like she'd done nothing wrong - I think she actually said "all's fair in love and war" to which I said "WE ARE 15!!!!"

On a more general note she and other friends also had this strange habit as teens that when we went out at the weekend, if they found someone they wanted to cop off with, they would just go. I never did this, wasn't interested in casual sex. I had many miserable evenings as a teenager suddenly realising my last friend who had "gone to the loo" wasn't coming back and making my own way home. This was pre-mobiles. Sometimes it happened even if I was supposed to be staying at one of their houses - it's how I ended up getting sexually assaulted, went clubbing, one by one my friends paired off until finally the girl I was supposed to be staying with copped off with someone leaving me with his friend. I had nowhere to go but his room - wasn't a good idea.

One time I was single and very interested in a bloke at a party, other friend (who had a boyfriend) wouldn't leave us alone or get the hints I kept dropping. I finally snogged him while she was there, hoping she'd finally get the hint and toddle off and she JOINED IN. I left them to it.

It all led me to believe that women are heartless when it comes to men and sex and will screw you over the deepest friendships at the first opportunity for a bit of male attention / validation

JonnyPocketRocket Wed 16-Oct-19 22:27:09

Spent a lovely holiday with ex-fiancee, we went to look at a plot of land together with a view to buying it and building a house on it, made plans for the future etc. Two days after we went back to our respective homes (we didn't live together) he emailed saying "I think it would be better if we were just friends". No explanation, nothing.
I'm now very happily married to someone else for over a decade but I'm still bewildered and hurt when I think of it, just because it came so out of the blue and I never found out why and because who breaks off an engagement with a one line email ffs?!

DuMondeB Wed 16-Oct-19 22:39:43

My dad has been telling me he has six months to live since I was 11.

I turn 43 next week.

Longlongsummer Wed 16-Oct-19 22:39:56

My father for totally abandoning us.

My Ex for hooking up with four other women while I was pregnant with our child.

My half sister for hugging everyone goodbye except me at our fathers family gathering just to make me feel bad. No idea what I’d done this time but that yes she is a bitch. She phoned up two months later to do her usual here are all my problems chat but I was finally sick of her so I said sorry I was busy. That was 4 years ago. Good riddance.

My SIL for being a bitch and telling her brother that even though he’d slept with other women that he was still a good guy and to make sure that he never gave me a penny of the house. Yes the Ex who cheated on me whilst pregnant. And then proceeded to have a big family gathering and not invite me, but invite our baby, because I ‘might be volatile’ and she didn’t want her mum upset. Thanks for the womanly support ladies!

Pyjamaface Wed 16-Oct-19 23:41:22

Messaged my oldest friend to tell her my dad had died and she replied 😭.

I've known her nearly 20 years, she had met my dad numerous times and you know, I had assumed she might have some sort of sympathy for me. But no, I got a fucking emoji and that was it.

She's now deleted and blocked

SadieBaneso Wed 16-Oct-19 23:42:30

Among numerous shitty things vile ex did the worst was on the day my DF died. It was completely out the blue and I was in the kind of state most people would be.
He had been dead three hours when ex started getting changed, putting on aftershave etc. On asking what he was doing I was told he had arranged to meet a friend who was having some marriage problems for a drink and “couldn’t let him down”. After begging him not to leave me on my own he said he might stay in if I “cheered up a bit”. As I couldn’t really manage this, what with my father dying a couple of hours before, he went anyway.

OhioOhioOhio Wed 16-Oct-19 23:44:12

Lies. Lies. Lies. All from my stbxh.

KurriKurri Wed 16-Oct-19 23:51:55

My DH of 32 yrs leaft note on the doormat one day telling me he'd run off with a Romanian woman (well young girl actually) he'd met on the internet. That was pretty shit - gave me PTSD, I had no inkling anything was going on or was wrong with my marriage. I still get nightmares and flashbacks several years later (although that is partly from his incredibly abusive behaviour in the lead up to our divorce). Seeing him makes me feel physically scared and sick - but I have to occasionally because we have grown up children together and our paths occasionally cross.

Another shit thing was the day after my DDad died, SS phoned up and asked us to return the blocks he had to raise his chair up so it was easier to get in and out of.

Another shit thing was when my brother died, some woman who was an aquaintance of my mother's came round to 'offer condolances' and when my Mum popped out of the room for a few minutes the woman said to me 'I expect its a huge relief to everyone really that he's died' (this because my brother was disabled and therefore we must be glad to be rid of him, as opposed to devastated because we'd lost someone we adored hmm)

VaperCut Thu 17-Oct-19 00:02:18

I worked in a shop and was responsible for locking up on Saturdays when we closed midday. The manager rang me late one Saturday night shouting that I had left the door unlocked and was lucky nobody had realized especially due to the nature of what we sold. I was in bits and kicking myself for months for my carelessness.

A year later this same manager was sacked. Owner found out manager had been letting himself into the shop during closed hours and helping himself to goods and other things which are too outing.

Anyway I learnt that the day he rang me mouthing off he'd done exactly that, let himself in on Saturday afternoon after I'd (securely) locked up but HE forgot to lock the door and placed the blame on me!

100PercentThatBitch Thu 17-Oct-19 00:16:00

On reflection it's hard to pick the shittest

I've been the victim of a crime and the person who committed it was a friend, but I don't really want to post more than that

When I knew I was going to be hospitalised and my best friend was full of "we will drive all night to get to you if we have to" before it happened and was a literal ghost when it did. And the shittest thing about it was that it made me reevaluate our entire friendship and I realised I'd excused selfish and me me me behaviour for years and that I'd been wasting my time. I posted about her on here and someone did that patronising thing of "you don't like her very much do you?" And I didn't like the question but then I realised it was true. To add insult to injury she now also has form for contacting my relatives for updates on me whilst not contacting me at all. The friendship is gone but what I resent is this idea that she thinks she's the one that's "had to end this difficult friendship" when it's very much mutual

abbey44 Thu 17-Oct-19 00:22:12

I had two horses, one I rode and one as a field companion for him. My sister volunteered to look after them for me for a week while I was having hospital treatment, and decided that the field companion was a waste of money and that I should have her PTS. When I said that wasn't going to happen, she went ahead and did it anyway. Called in the local hunt (who did it for free and took the body away to feed the hounds) and told me afterwards. Couldn't understand why I was upset (slight understatement) and said what was done was done and I should just get over it. That was several years ago, and she still can't understand why I can't bear to be in the same room as her.

100PercentThatBitch Thu 17-Oct-19 00:27:23

Wow @abbey44 I thought MY sister was a nasty piece of work. She's done a lot of shitty things to me but they are mostly quite petty so I didn't go into them thanksgin

Aloe6 Thu 17-Oct-19 00:42:08

That’s horrendous abbey44 shock

Chickydoo Thu 17-Oct-19 00:43:21

Went on holiday with boyfriend. Had been together for a year or two
He sat me down and asked in a romantic voice if I was in Love 😍
He then told me he was and her name was Kate (clearly not chickydoo) BASTARD!
That was 30 years ago. Lucky escape for me.

managedmis Thu 17-Oct-19 00:53:45

That'd be curtains for me, abbey flowers

Christ almighty

myidentitymycrisis Thu 17-Oct-19 01:07:42

My mum turned up in a&e saying she was scared of looking after my 7 year old as she might strangle him.
As a result I was investigated by Ss and we had to stop seeing her. When she ‘felt better’ she expected to be welcomed back

notangelinajolie Thu 17-Oct-19 01:08:40

madcatladyforever I don't have a shitty tale to tell but yours is truly the shittiest. Yes, you are not wrong it thinking it is shocking and you are well rid of him.

OhIKnew Thu 17-Oct-19 01:15:58

A guy I was seeing and used to stay over at my house most of the time, packed his things and left while I was asleep. I woke up to him and everything belonging to him gone. It was probably the cruellest thing that has been done to me. That utter shock, bereavement?, disbelief, anger at myself for not waking up, his utter cunning. Nasty bastard.

Rafiple Thu 17-Oct-19 01:20:22

Someone heavily persuaded me drop out of uni and take a job with them, it was a well paid job that would of majorly kicked off my career, let me travel the world, so I dropped out before my 4th year to take it. 6th months in they did something bad that got them in the newspapers for the wrong reasons, when I declined taking the fall for this, I was fired, told if I ask for a reference they would give me a terrible one hmm and then decided to smear my name anyway to basically everyone even vaguely connected to that job or similar ones ensuring I couldn't get a job in that industry, all because they fucked up and did something that had zero to do with me. Fun times! It's been years and years now but I'm still angry about the injustice of how it all played out.

GeorgiaGirl52 Thu 17-Oct-19 01:21:16

Abbey44 if this was a contest you would win.

NowWhatUsernameShallIHave Thu 17-Oct-19 01:25:59

Husband cheated last year - we’ve separated and going through a nasty divorce
I’ve had cancer Stage 4 and he kept telling me that I had changed confused (no shit Sherlock)
Yesterday he came round and put our DS to sleep in my bed and fell asleep with him angry
When he left he was saying the most absurd things that my health was causing DSs anxiety and when the child therapist told me that I started crying because I must have done something wrong to feel that guilty
The icing on the cake was his words
‘When you die I will have to pick up the pieces’

IdiotInDisguise Thu 17-Oct-19 01:28:12

Good grief, how long did you stay together with that prick?

My exh went home to sleep as soon as DS was born after I spent 27 hours in labour. A nurse told him he needed a rest because he looked exhausted he said. So I was left alone, keeping an eye on a baby who was chocking with own laringe, not quite out of the epidural therefore unable to walk myself to pick up breakfast from the trolley. He reappeared at night to tell me that he had spent the day wandering around town marvelled at the idea that he was now a father.

Sadly, that was just a small glimpse of what the next 5 years of my life would be and far from being the worse thing he ever did.

expat101 Thu 17-Oct-19 01:33:15

I think the one that affected me the most was being hired in the hospitality industry as secretary (committee run, no management) during a time when the premise was experiencing stock and cash theft. A security consultant was brought in, who proved a number of staff members were stealing funds, and the bar manager (mother of one of them) was gifting alcohol and palming back payment. During that time my duties were expanded to buying stock and monitoring cameras, cashing up bar takings and all banking. Bar Manager was asked to resign and bar staff went through the Court system. I worked the following Christmas Day and started management of the premise overall while security consultant brought in his own duty manager for the running of the bar. A contract bar manager was engaged who did a runner owing thousands and thousands to the premise. Again I was asked to keep the doors open and sorted out creditors with re-payment offers. Fast forward to the final 12 months of my employment, Committee had undergone major change and the incoming executive also started to help themselves to grog with one sleeping on-premises as too drunk to go home some nights. They, in turn, engaged bar staff who would have their own friends in after shift, turn the lights off and drink away. I was advised by a couple of clientele so checked out the cameras to confirm. We had appointed a new auditor who wanted proper electronic stock taking systems put into place which ultimately was sabotaged. From then on, the main executive would exclude me from all meetings (in my position of secretary) and also threatened that the bar staff would bring in the relevant union if I maintained access to cameras. He called in the security company responsible for cameras to change cabinet lock preventing my access and otherwise made my life very unpleasant, so I walked with no support from the remaining committee. Auditor stood down. Later I was to hear there was a bit of a smear campaign against me by that executive, and it took me a number of years to move on.

OhIKnew Thu 17-Oct-19 01:35:17

This is just the thread for me tonight. My 'boyfriend' was very much of the lines, 'we're not a couple'. So he went off and shagged someone tonight. So, we're not a couple.

NowWhatUsernameShallIHave Thu 17-Oct-19 01:42:42

Idiot in disguise are you asking me?

He couldn’t understand why I got severely depressed and anxiety after my cancer.
There’s so many stories
We were invited to his managers 60th and when I told him I was nervous as I have social anxiety as well he left without me
I had a panic attack which he called episodes and when I had a major one he just stood there and watched me. Ms son who was 7 comforted me and brought me some water

NowWhatUsernameShallIHave Thu 17-Oct-19 01:43:46

He called my ADs happy pills and that they weren’t doing the job as I wasn’t very happy

Guiltypleasures001 Thu 17-Oct-19 01:45:54

Being in the hospital with dyeing daughter, and he's trying to/did shag my then best mate.

oabiti Thu 17-Oct-19 02:08:04

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

oabiti Thu 17-Oct-19 02:11:55


No way! What a vile pair!

cafenoirbiscuit Thu 17-Oct-19 02:20:24

Left outside in the rain at a wake by people I thought were my friends. I had pneumonia at the time as it happened. Spent the night alone in hotel with stress inco, coughing till I vomited, while they whooped it up. Funnily enough I wasn’t cheery the next morning, friends bitched about me being miserable to the widow, who sent me a message saying ‘it’s not all about you’.
Thanks ‘friends’.

Aveisenim Thu 17-Oct-19 02:21:44

Malicious referral made about us to social services by a neighbour because we had to report them for their behaviour towards us... Still not past that one and they still live next door.

Nextphonewontbesamsung Thu 17-Oct-19 02:25:28

@KurriKurri I remember you posting about your husband at the time. I'm so sorry he put you through a difficult time over the divorce as well. It must be painful that your adult children still even want to have a relationship with him after all that flowers.

raskolnikova Thu 17-Oct-19 02:26:36

There's been a lot of competition for shittiest thing done to me recently.

One in particular: I had to find somewhere to live with my two month old baby. I was abroad at the time and the relationship with the father had broken down badly. I found a flatshare with a woman who seemed perfect - child-friendly, non-smoker, clean, lift in building, etc. I already vaguely knew her. It seemed to be going fine for a couple of months.

Then she accused me of bringing men back to the flat for sex. She claimed to have stood outside my bedroom door and listened to me having sex with them. She had also heard me typing on my laptop, which she decided was the sound of me sexting hmm confused.

She text me saying that she was getting home from work at 1am and I had to leave then. She had told my baby's father about my supposed liaisons and told me I had to stay with him. Baby's father was furious. I freaked out, fled the flat with my daughter, who was now four months old, and stayed in a hotel. The woman threw all of my and my baby's possessions into bin liners and changed the lock on the door. A friend had to go round with their car and pick the stuff up for me.

I had never had anyone round to the flat, for sex or otherwise. I honestly don't know what the fuck her problem was. I'm still baffled by what happened.

oabiti Thu 17-Oct-19 02:28:22



CeciliaMcFlange Thu 17-Oct-19 02:41:02

@oabiti why such an unnecessarily mean post?

Some of these are so shocking flowers to you all. So many people behaving so badly.

Elbowedout Thu 17-Oct-19 02:42:15

My in laws were looking after my children during my mother's funeral. (Which I did appreciate.)My husband was meant to pick them up after the service and bring them to join us at the wake. I felt they were too young to be at the actual funeral but I really wanted them to come to the wake, partly because I wanted them to be involved in some way in saying goodbye to their grandma, partly because there were some more distant relatives there who had not met my children and said they would like to, partly because I thought them being there would lighten the mood a bit and my Mum would have liked that, and partly because I was, believe it or not, feeling a tad emotional and actually really needed my family around me.
But when DH went to collect them they weren't in. ILs had taken the children out. When DH finally managed to find them they were in a play area and his mother wouldn't let him take them because they were having fun and she didn't think they should have anything to do with the funeral.
So I was left at the wake with no husband and no children, with the relatives who had travelled long distances eventually having to leave without seeing them. I didn't have my phone with me so couldn't contact DH. In the end there was just me and the ladies from the Church who had done the food left. They were very apologetic but said they had to lock up and go. I then spent about half an hour stood outside in the pouring rain waiting as everyone else had left and DH was supposed to be driving us home afterwards. It is years ago now but I am crying thinking about it even now. My children should have been with me, my husband should have been with me and she prevented it. My mother's funeral was of no consequence and my family were shown no respect. My grief was compounded by hideous embarrassment and anger. Who expects to end up abandoned and alone at their mother's funeral because their MIL thinks a fucking soft play session is more important.
My MIL has said and done a lot that upsets me over the years but I have learned to let most of it go over my head. But I will NEVER forgive her for this.

oabiti Thu 17-Oct-19 02:45:15

41CeciliaMcFlange...did you even read the post I commented on??

oabiti Thu 17-Oct-19 02:46:54

Message deleted by MNHQ. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

Sillyscrabblegames Thu 17-Oct-19 03:03:26

Coping with aftermath of a stillbirth and supposed best friend suddenly went cold on me, walked off when I spoke, cut me out of things, didn't smile at the school run. I was a total mess and apparently I wasn't doing a good enough job of grieving openly or Something.
I didn't realise at the time that she was isolating me socially, speaking to people behind my back, as I was in such a bad way but little snippets kept coming out from other people.
After I got myself back together and had some financial success, she was really jealous and had further episodes of ignoring me or blocking me out of things. I was mentally more together then and have distanced myself now for my own mental health.
But it was a really really bad time for me and in hindsight she made it all so much worse and I didn't even realise what was going on.

SucculentCandle Thu 17-Oct-19 03:20:08

My ex got a great new job and decided he was going to buy me and our DD a new car which would be in my name. We weren't married and didn't live together (thank fuck) but he used my details and forged my signature to take out £24,000 worth of finance in MY name and stopped paying after a couple of months. The car was repossessed and my credit rating destroyed.
Thankfully the credit company believed me and involved the police. He confessed and my credit rating was eventually repaired.

DisneyMadeMeDoIt Thu 17-Oct-19 07:26:17


Oh gosh I’m sorry that my ‘worst thing somebody has done to me’ didn’t please you. I’d read a fair few ‘lighter’ ones and thought my 14 weeks of constant hospitalisation, severe depression and complete isolation might qualify -but obviously I had to write it a bit tongue in cheek as DH and I did this to me.., funny enough nobody ever warned me you could almost die from pregnancy.
No, those talking about teenage crushes who ‘did them wrong’ have clearly suffered FAR more than me.

proudestofmums Thu 17-Oct-19 08:08:23

Dearest friend at school - my only bridesmaid, godmother to DS, and they adored each other- suddenly cut all contact when DS was 14. No explanation, nothing. I and DS were both very hurt, this was early 90s so no SM.

Ringsender2 Thu 17-Oct-19 08:54:29

@disneymademedoit you don't have to justify yourself. I think the pp has had an irony bypass

LittleCandle Thu 17-Oct-19 09:06:30

When DF died, I had to phone various people to tell them, of course. A friend volunteered to ring my ex-SIL, who she knew and had met several times. DF had always made a huge fuss of my inlaws and I thought they would want to know. Friend phoned and told her the sad news. There was a slight pause, then ex-SIL said 'and what do you want me to say?' Friend is seldom lost for words, but she was that time. I have never seen the miserable old bitch ex-SIL since, but if I ever do, she will be given the very rough edge of my tongue. She has also been utterly vile to DD2, for which I will also never forgive her.

Clawdy Thu 17-Oct-19 09:23:20

Many years ago I was training to be a nurse, and also engaged to a man who lived miles away. We wrote lots of letters to each other. I broke off the engagement. In my letters I mentioned several times a Sister on one particular ward who I couldn't stand because she was unpleasant to the trainee nurses. He cut out all the bits in my letters where I moaned about her, and posted them to her. She asked to see me, and showed me the letters, I'll never forget the horror of seeing those pages on her desk.What made it worse in a way, was that she was so kind and concerned about it! She said "Don't worry about these letters, it goes no further than you and me, I am just worried that someone could be so bitter towards you."

peridito Thu 17-Oct-19 09:25:59

shitiest thing was when a friend formed a relationship with my now ex husband.They are now married .

Accept there must have been problems in the marriage but in my book you don't kick a person when they're down .

DarrellMakepeace Thu 17-Oct-19 09:40:52

Wow to some of these.
Might be back later with a contribution.

strongteawith2sugars Thu 17-Oct-19 09:46:24

@madcatladyforever fucking hell!!!! Thank god you got rid of him!!

Ferretyone Thu 17-Oct-19 17:21:37


The activity is quite normal on honeymoon if memory serves. The result is connected and could have been prevented! shock

Hope you feel better though.


labazsisgoingmad Thu 17-Oct-19 19:08:52

my ex mil was the biggest bitch walking this earth. apart from just being generally spiteful and constantly inviting my exh to go on drinking binges with her which he loved as he was an alcoholic. he would just go for days on end leaving me with my dds and no money food etc. if it was not for my late parents we would have starved.
worse was when my dm was in hospital dying. just before dawn the one morning my bil came to tell me mum had died obviously i was upset and he put his arms around me and gave me a comforting hug. mil who was stopping with us at the time worse luck told my exh later that i was having an affair with bil and i couldnt keep my hands off him when he came to see me earlier.
later that day after a very upsetting time telling the children granny had died i was just so devastated and exmil started moaning she was hungry. when i apologised and said hadnt been thinking straight she said 'fuck the dead think of the living' . evil doesnt describe her. i was so upset she started having a tantrum a toddler would be proud of and insisted exh went for a drink with her. when exh was way over the limit he drove her home and i did not see him for 6 days as he went on a binge.
the other week i was on holiday with my dp. before anyone asks he is on the sex register for a very minor offence of voyeurism not involving adults or children all to do with an ex nothing on computers or camera but when complaint was made there was a photo of a bathroom on the camera so hence the charge very long and complicated but i know the facts.
anyway a year ago i helped set up a charity shop for a local animal charity and worked damned hard at it. 2 weeks ago we had a four night break on holiday and on last night after a lovely holiday we got a message from the charity boss saying not to come back to shop he had found out my partner was on the register. we pointed out that in a small town after 4 years everyone knows that and it is nearly spent anyway plus he did not employ him but me. turns out dp auntie had been going round the town ensuring all the shops knew about him why we do not know but the charity refuses to have me working for them now which has really upset me after all i did for them and how much i enjoyed it. the lady in there now has really brought the shop down and has many issues so i am waiting for it all to go wrong for him

Groovee Thu 17-Oct-19 19:20:08

Friend of 11 years. Had always kept her at arms length due to the way she treated people. But I had been unwell and let her in. There were a group of 7 of us who met up weekly. The owner of the cafe joined our group and we gave her lots of support through a difficult time.

Friend of 11 years was very besotted with the cafe owner and was desperate to be her bestie. She then introduced another woman that I was struggling to put my finger on. She was always buying the cafe owner and ex friend gifts.

One night this new woman actually dug her nails into my arm while we got a group photo. It actually shocked me. Then she started sending me messages telling me my group hated me.

One night cafe owner lost the rag. She contacted me to tell me everything. That the group knew I was being bullied and that she never wanted to see my ex friend or new woman ever again.

The cafe owner had really supported another woman who believed ex friend and the three of them left our group. The six of us still see each other all the time and go away. I just wish I had told someone sooner.

Raffles1981 Thu 17-Oct-19 19:45:14

My ex husband and I caught our NDN, on camera, slashing our car tyres (the police were doing nothing about it, despite it happening once a week, sometimes more) we showed the police the tape, they said we couldn't use it as we had set up the camera but it was suggested we could take them to small claims court. So we started the ball rolling. The wife asked me to come over and talk. I did and she informed me she had cancer (she has a DS 8 months old) so we dropped it and agreed to let things be. She didn't have cancer, their hate campaign on us continued until we moved away. Nasty, awful woman.

smemorata Thu 17-Oct-19 19:52:20

At the end of my first year in uni I organised a whip round to buy our cleaner a present - she was more than a cleaner really and we were all really close to her so lots of donations. I unexpectedly had to leave for a family matter so a girl whom I regarded as a friend offered to take the money and be in charge of buying the present. When I came back it turned out that not only had she pocketed the money, she had also told everyone I had stolen it!

Not as bad as some of these but it was my first encounter with such brazen behaviour that it stayed with me!

SilverySurfer Thu 17-Oct-19 20:07:04

Met a man - made him aware early on that I couldn't have children and he said he didn't want children so all good. Five years later, living together, after a night of good sex and me cooking him his favourite breakfast he told me that he had found someone new. It would have hurt enough but he then added, she can give me what you can't - children. He then thought it entirely reasonable to ask me to give him a lift to the local tube station.

LilyJade Thu 17-Oct-19 20:13:05

A male friend turned out to have been particularly nasty about my appearance behind my back, to this day I don't understand his motivation?

A manager at my old workplace tried to destroy my career & reputation when I was clearly unwell.
Luckily the professional body she reported me to recognised that I was unwell & also that I had done nothing wrong.

thecornishpasty Thu 17-Oct-19 23:58:23

I was with BF for a few years and he worked away. Whenever he was at home he stayed between mine and his mothers house. Did not pay rent as it was only a few days a fortnight and I could manage the mortgage without him. We discussed marriage and chose a ring together, which in due course he bought and proposed with. I began planning the wedding and we got a cat together. He then left his job and got a none travelling one, everything was going great. He wouldn't commit to moving into mine so still spent his time between mine and his mothers, therefore paying no rent to either of us.

My parents offered to pay for half the wedding and me and him split the rest 25% each. We set up an account to transfer an amount each month each in, to reach our target. We chose a venue and bridesmaid dresses and all other bits. I noticed he wasn't putting in his full amount into the savings pot so began subbing him, expecting him to pick up the slack at the end of the saving period.

Invitations went out, everyone booked accommodation and travel. He came home from work one day, told me he wasn't happy, I had forced him into everything and he was leaving and left. I havn't seen him since. I dropped all his stuff off at his mothers, cancelled everything and told everyone what had happened. My parents lost over £10,000 and I spent the next year depressed and alone. He had never paid a penny towards rent or the wedding in all the years I was with him. He moved on quickly and, within a few months, was dating another girl, who he is still with and expecting a baby with. I have no idea if she knows I existed and have never seen him since.

Longlongsummer Fri 18-Oct-19 01:47:05

@thecornishpasty bloody hell! That is awful you poor thing. You were dropped in it completely. What a spineless selfish man. I hope you have got better.

OnTopOfTheWardrobe Fri 18-Oct-19 02:10:00

I can't even talk about the worst thing, it's too painful

OnTopOfTheWardrobe Fri 18-Oct-19 02:13:51

Pressed send too soon!
- But I a "friend" that I travelled miles from home to see. The arrangement was to stay with said friend at her house. Said friend and I went out, she met some random man. She said to me "Do you mind staying somewhere else so he can come back with me?"
She was serious. She got offended when I said yes, I did mind! I went home next day instead of a few days later as she was giving me the silent treatment- we haven't spoken to this day.
Pales in comparison to this thread, though.

Whomei Fri 18-Oct-19 02:21:53

Boyfriend of 6 years told me out of the blue one day he had met someone else and it was over. Absolute shock to system and years of heartbreak to follow. Worked in same company, and shortly afterwards he called down to speak to me. I work in HR and he wanted me to give him an employment confirmation letter for bank as him and new bitch girlfriend were applying for a mortgage together!

Join the discussion

Registering is free, quick, and means you can join in the discussion, watch threads, get discounts, win prizes and lots more.

Get started »