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Newborn questions

(63 Posts)
wombatron Mon 10-Jun-19 14:28:55

Hi all. I'm due DC 1 in around 7 weeks, and and have been slowly working my way through the books, the lists all the other things. I've got so many questions that I can't seem to answer, so wondered if anyone fancied sharing some words of wisdom?

Baby sleeps in our room till 6 months for help with prevention of SIDS - does it matter where in the room the crib is? I don't like the next to me and it's not suitable for our bed and the space we have. But is it that it can be at the foot of the bed? Anywhere not near a window/radiator?

Do I literally have to take the baby everywhere during the first 6 months? Like if I shower? Make a cup of tea? I can sort of see showering, but if I'm in the lounge and am 10 steps away in the kitchen, what if I am getting a drink?

Is there anything you wish you bought that no one told you about that would have made your life easier that you discovered later?

Any hints and tips? I have a 'box' in each room with nappies, wipes, grows, muslin cloths etc. But I'm sure that there's hundreds of things out there that can help.

Did anyone have a home birth that would like to share their experiences? Hospital bag must haves?


InDubiousBattle Mon 10-Jun-19 14:39:32

Foot of the bed is fine for a cot, just means you have to actually get out of bad to deal with your baby.

I took my dc into the bathroom in a bouncy chair when I hada shower. You're fine to go get a drink! Ds (pfb)had pretty much every nap either on me or in the buggy though so wasn't ever really left alone to nap. Dd slept in the buggy or the sling for most naps. Both of mine were a bit older when they napped in the cot so no longer under 6 months.

With my second I had 2 hospital bags, one labour the other for after. The labour bag had drinks, nightie, small wash bag, couple of pairs of big knickers, pads and a zip lock bag with a newborn nappy, vest, sleep suit in for the baby's first clothes. Other bag had everything else in. With my first it was all in one bag and we were having good to root about for things.

Hello1231 Mon 10-Jun-19 14:53:48

Maybe check with the midwife at your next appointment, but a cot should be okay at the foot of the bad. It'd be easier by the bed as its surprising how much you check on baby in the night, especially at first and it means you don't have to fully get up.

Ewan the Dream sheep was the best thing we bought, but most things you can get once they're here. For example, everyone recommended we get a Sleepyhead, but turns out that our little one was okay settling in her cot without one.

In my bag I had big pants (the bigger the better haha), some mini toiletries, a big towel (not necessary but the hospital ones were small and I wanted a water birth), snacks and isotonic sports drink, nightie, comfy baggy clothes to wear home, sandals as my feet were really swollen and normal shoes wouldn't fit, maternity pads and I think that's about all I ended up using for myself. In the other bag I would recommend baby clothes in a few sizes, we were expecting a 'normal' size baby but my other half had to go and get some in a bigger size.

Hello1231 Mon 10-Jun-19 14:55:51

Also we've found a changing table with nappies, wipes etc in just the one room has been more than enough, and wouldn't want to be changing dirty nappies all over the house tbh; probably wont need a box in each room (unless you have a huge house). Make sure you have loads of muslins though, they're so handy and need washing surprisingly often.

itscallednickingbentcoppers Mon 10-Jun-19 14:56:27

It's not even the getting up with the cot at the foot of the bed, it's the putting them back in after a feed or cuddle - you'll be so so so tired even moving those few inches could be too hard risking you falling asleep in an unsafe position.

You can leave baby sleeping in Moses basket to make a cup of tea yes. For a shower I'd probably bring them into the bathroom or just outside the door if not practical. A sling is handy if you get on with them, we didn't.

Pipandmum Mon 10-Jun-19 15:14:23

I’m going against the grain here but my children slept in their own rooms on a different floor from day one. I bf them both and just got up to do it. As for showering or grabbing a tea, answering the door etc they were put in a travel cot. I never took them up the two flights to their room during the day so travel cot and supply of nappies downstairs. My babies were over 10 lbs at birth so never had a sling and I couldn’t imagine having them attached to me like that anyway. Of course I cuddled them but they spent a lot of time on a play mat with stuff hanging down to grab and pull. Also had a bouncy chair and when older a bumbo chair - I have a pic of my four month old giving me the side eye from it while I was wrapping Xmas presents!
They slept in the travel cot or in their cot in their room, or in push chair if out and about. Rarely did they sleep on me.

Secretlifeofme Mon 10-Jun-19 15:35:41

Sorry but I'm jumping on to follow, 20 weeks here and clueless!

madcatladyforever Mon 10-Jun-19 15:48:53

Wow we had no such concerns back in the 80s just left them to sleep on their own. Mind you I'd wake up in a panic if he slept too long.

paddington34 Mon 10-Jun-19 15:59:39

Not next to radiator. You'll probably want to have baby situated where you can see them when you are in bed. Best thing I got was a movement detector from Amazon (mine was the Nanny one). I was so worried about SIDS that it meant I could do to sleep easier knowing the alarm was on.

The other advice is to have a massive clear out before baby comes. I did this (most mums to be do) and the place was spotless but I didn't appreciate how much stuff a baby comes with and I wish I had made more cupboard space, especially in the kitchen.

Meal prep. Fill the freezer with frozen food you will appreciate it so much.

A sling is great for hands free time I got a fabric one at first to save money but I couldn't get used to the faff of tying it so got a more.expensive Ergo one which I am still using at 10 months.

Don't buy cute baby clothes until she is older than 6months. They will need to be changed so much when they are little that it's so much better to have them in sleepsuits and people will buy you clothes anyway. There are some good newborn essential videos on YouTube that I found helpful.

DinosApple Mon 10-Jun-19 16:00:51

We had the cot at the foot of the bed and a Moses basket beside. DD1 had a bouncy chair that I put her in when I needed to get stuff done like shower. She stayed in the hall by the kitchen door when I had to cook. She hated the sling so that was no good.

DC2 loved the sling so that was easy.

I had a change mat, wipes and nappies one downstairs (under the sofa), one upstairs (under the cot).

Can't remember what was in my bag, but I remember wishing I had food!

Spam88 Mon 10-Jun-19 16:04:55

The safe sleep guidelines don't specify any particular location in your room where the cot should be, so there's no problem having it at the foot of the bed in that respect. I personally got out of bed to feed anyway - I had a chair in another room, far more comfortable than propping myself up with pillows in bed and less risk of falling asleep and losing the baby in the duvet somewhere (which you will constantly wake up thinking you've done 😂). You'll find what works for you anyway.

TheBabyAteMyBrain Mon 10-Jun-19 16:15:45

What kind of homebirth are you having? I had a 'dry land' one with ds2. What would you like to know?

Hospital bag must haves for me, after a long stay with Ds1, is food and drink. Lots of snacks. I was constantly forgotten about (we had our own room due to ds'needs) or had consultations right when food was delivered and missed many meals. I was chuffing starving all the bloody time. Also big ass black pants, big towel, easy to feed in nightwear if you plan to bf, and entertainment for when up all night feeding and shushing. Highly recommend Netflix or amazon prime on the phone. A handheld fan, wards are hotter than hell, and flip flops for the shower/walking the wards.

Whyismycatanasshat Mon 10-Jun-19 16:22:51

Perfect prep machine!

wombatron Mon 10-Jun-19 16:32:42

Wow thanks for the replies so far! Yes I did think it was a bit much that people were saying I'd have to take it everywhere all of the time. If I was popping out of the room for 5mins to boil the kettle it seemed like a lot of effort!

Hospital bag has the basics in for me post birth wise - I don't take a lot for myself on holiday so have tried not to overpack, and is a back up in case of transfer. It has toiletries, pads, disposable knickers, big knickers, flip flops and toiletries. PJ's and a couple of pairs of clothes. I've got some lucozade, jelly babies and crisps. I do plan to keep some quick sandwiches in the fridge which I'll make during the early stages of labour - I'll hopefully be at home for the whole thing and hopefully be moving - not talking a full Ruben but peanut butter and jam type thing. I've also got some bits for DH like snacks and neurofen.

Baby has it's own bag with 2 sizes of clothes etc. There will hopefully be harvested collestrum if I can manage it in the freezer also. Are there any must have snacks?

@TheBabyAteMyBrain I am unsure. I waiver between hiring a pool or not, I don't know why I'm doubting my want of one, I had always assumed I would but now it's approaching I'm not certain. We have space to do so, but we also have a rather large bath that possibly won't be ok to birth in due to the midwife wanting access, but certainly big enough to see me through some contractions and lounge in. How did you find yours? I'm told I'll need lots of towels and old sheets?

Tootyfrooty35 Mon 10-Jun-19 16:49:30

Home birth here for no.2... Others were hospital births. For a dry land bieth I'd highly recommend something to lie on, on the floor.... The ikea folding gym mat is ideal. My knees were the sorest part of me after because I was kneeling or lying on the carpet/laminate.
Very little mess, I really wouldn't worry but have.chrao shower curtain and some towels handy.

I've laboured three times now and never snacked... First I had an epidural so wasn't 'allowed', second and third were too fast. I did pack some yummy things for after though... Actually took scones, jam and squirty crem last time to go with my tea and toast 😂

SenoraSurf Mon 10-Jun-19 16:50:57


polkadotjersey Mon 10-Jun-19 16:52:37

I had a home birth in January and it was wonderful. Happy to answer any questions.

I second the recommendations for a sling. My daughter lived in a stretchy wrap (Baby Peta) for the first three months; they're a bit fiddly to start with but there are tutorials on YouTube and you soon get used to it. Now she's nearly five months we mostly use a Beco Gemini structured carrier or a ring sling. A local sling library will be helpful if you have one as they can give you advice and you can hire different types.

We bought a Joie Serina Swivel chair from Facebook Marketplace which has been great for naps since she was tiny. I wouldn't recommend getting anything like that new though, in case your baby doesn't like it.

HalfBloodPrincess Mon 10-Jun-19 17:14:26

Best Buy was a sponge bath support - you lie the baby on it in the bath then you have both hands free to wash/play. Can be used in baby bath or the family bath tub. They’re good up until baby starts to roll over (can then be used to sit them on) and you can get one for less than a tenner!

londonloves Mon 10-Jun-19 17:15:21

I had a transfer into hospital (planned home birth) and would say - make sure your partner knows where the various bags are and what's in them. You may not be in a fit state to remind them at the time of transfer.
I had a pool and it really helped with pain relief, although I had to get out due to lack of progression.
I didn't snack but I could've eaten a horse the next day in hospital so the snacks were useful then.
If you want to breast feed, get a list ready of bf cafe/support groups in case you need them. If you end up going with formula, the perfect prep is amazing.

londonloves Mon 10-Jun-19 17:17:13

Other best buys: about 100 muslins, second hand bouncy chair which played a tune, second hand manduca sljng/carrier. Hardly used the Pram in the early months.

Poetryinaction Mon 10-Jun-19 17:26:18

Firstly, it is so different for everyone.
But I've had 3 and LOVED it so here's my tuppence:
No homebirths. Births 1 and 3 were awful and I am so glad I wasn't at home.
I breastfed but got out of bed each time. Saved me backache. Do not turn your phone on. Keep it dark and quiet. Baby learns night from day and you stay sleepy.
Newborns sleep a lot. I found it very easy to make and drink tea, shower etc while they slept.
I also gave them lots of time on the floor from a young age. They got strong and learnt to crawl early.
My best purchase was a bath support sonyou could use your hands while bathing them.

Newborns are amazing. So snuggly and soft and downy and perfect. Enjoy!

wombatron Mon 10-Jun-19 17:39:23

Ooooh @polkadotjersey was it how you imagined it?

@Tootyfrooty35 the shower curtain is an amazing idea. I was going to end up spending a fortune on those puppy pad type things for the bed in case I want to use that for anything.... you've just saved me £££ and some landfill space thank you!

On the home birth, aside from some towels and waterproofs is there anything else you could recommend to have on hand?

Thank you to everyone who's shared so far! I plan on breast feeding for the first few weeks but will likely switch to bottles so have a perfect prep ready and waiting.

Dandelion1993 Mon 10-Jun-19 17:41:56

I've never taken my DDs to the loo with me or shower. Would just put them in their cot where they'd be safe.

BertieBotts Mon 10-Jun-19 17:44:08

Crisps are too loud and crumby really. You'll be better with bite sized biscuits, like the animal ones they do for children at parties grin nutri grain or similar good if you like them too. Dried apricots or prunes excellent for post birth snacks. Not crumby or loud and help get that first poo moving.

Spam88 Mon 10-Jun-19 18:07:13

If you're breastfeeding then get yourself a tube of lansinoh (expensive, but lasts ages and your nipples are worth every penny!). Apply after every feed, even if you're not sore.

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