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Childless couples

(465 Posts)
letsgohooray Mon 20-May-19 20:24:27

I came to the realisation that 90% of our family life involves or revolves around the dc. Either driving them somewhere or organising something for them or getting stuff for them etc. I genuinely want to know what childless couples do when they are not working? I want a breakdown!!! Weekday evenings and weekends. What do you do with your time? DO you spend it with your dp or away on activities? What do you talk about with each other. It is a whole world I can not imagine.

AnotherEmma Mon 20-May-19 20:26:24

What a weird thread.
You really can't remember what life was like before having children?
You really have no friends or colleagues without young children that you chat to about their lives?

BobbinThreadbare123 Mon 20-May-19 20:26:27

We go to restaurants, we hike, mooch about town, get coffee, visit other places (a lot of National Trust), we do DIY, bake cakes, watch telly, listen to music, go to gigs or comedy shows, exercise.... We talk about all sorts of crap!

LynetteScavo Mon 20-May-19 20:26:47

Did you not exist as a couple before you gave birth?

letsgohooray Mon 20-May-19 20:30:54

I first gave birth over 25 years ago, so no, I can't really remember what we did. Bearing in mind, we were in the first flush of love so all we wanted to do was hang out with each other and what we did was inconsequential - but surely after 30 or 40 years together, things change.

mimibunz Mon 20-May-19 20:31:58

DH usually drags me out of bed around 9:20 on Sat/Sun mornings to walk to a local cafe for breakfast where we discuss our weekend plans, the upcoming week, stuff we’ve seen or read in the news, chat about work. Then we will kick around the house doing laundry and tidying, watching the F1 or rugby if it’s on. We might cook or order a takeaway, then watch a movie. We’re late 40s/early 50s.

LynetteScavo Mon 20-May-19 20:32:39

100% of family life revolves around kids when they were younger. Now they're teenagers it's 90%.

In the remaining 10% we go to the pub/gigs (often watching friends teens play grin) Go shopping, or to the gym. Spend ages choosing a new sofa/curtains/mattress (no money or time to when D.C. were small)

Exactly the same things we did before we had DC.

HilaryBriss Mon 20-May-19 20:34:25

During the week we watch TV, get on with hobbies etc.. weekends we might visit another city on the train, sometimes stay over sometimes don't, we go out to eat, go shopping in town, do the housework, go to the pub, lots of stuff!

ScreamingValenta Mon 20-May-19 20:36:28

At weekends, I spend time on my creative hobbies, sometimes go out somewhere with DH - e.g. to an English Heritage site. I read a lot. Listen to music. Walk the dog. Cuddle the cats. At weekends we might watch a film in the evening with a bottle of wine - otherwise we don't often have the TV on.

We talk about the usual sorts of things - current affairs arguing about Brexit, work, history, random topics arising from crossword clues etc. grin. Always have a lie-in at the weekends too.

I'm too tired after work to do much in the evenings during the week. Reading and messing about on the internet is about my lot!

Contrary to popular myth, we are not jet-setters or people who go out a lot socially. I'm quite reclusive and home-loving.

letsgohooray Mon 20-May-19 20:37:12

LynetteScavo, but you HAVE dc so as you say, 90% of your time is in some way involving or revolving around them. It's the people who don't have dc that I want to know about. The ones who have 100% of their time without dc to concern themselves with. The 10% of the time you spend doing all the things you listed....what would you do if you had not 10% of time to fill but 100%? How many coffee shops and National Trust properties can people enjoy, for 20, 30, 40 years? I'm not holding an opinion here, genuinely wondering.

AnotherEmma Mon 20-May-19 20:38:39

I really really hate the whole premise of your thread and I have a child!

I understand why people choose to be childfree now that I have a child grin

letsgohooray Mon 20-May-19 20:40:46

AnotherEmma you are reading something unnecessary into my thread if you 'really really hate' it. I am asking a question. I feel like life is so swamped with family things that I want to know what people do when they don't have dc. I have no idea why you have chosen to think there is some ulterior motive to my question. I just want to know how other people spend their time.

ScreamingValenta Mon 20-May-19 20:41:41

How many coffee shops and National Trust properties can people enjoy, for 20, 30, 40 years

But, unless you have lots of children over an extended period of time, surely they won't be living with you - or at least, living with you as dependents to be looked after and entertained - for more than 20 years or so? As LynetteScavo implies, you must have gradually increasing periods of child-free time.

IvanaPee Mon 20-May-19 20:42:15

How many coffee shops and National Trust properties can people enjoy, for 20, 30, 40 years?

As many as they want, I’d imagine!

Cuppa12345 Mon 20-May-19 20:42:24

The phrase is child free, not childless

OctoberOrchid Mon 20-May-19 20:42:26

We go on really long walks/hikes. We watch a lot of films. Now that the weather is nice, we cook breakfast on the weekends and sit in the garden for hours drinking coffee and reading/talking.
Nice holidays.
I like to spend a lot of my spare time at home decorating or gardening.
We live a very peaceful/private/simple life and that's exactly how I want it smile

Rakati Mon 20-May-19 20:44:03

Watch films, play video games, go running/biking/hiking together, read books, do hobbies, sorting out garden, growing veg, doing lots of DIY at the moment, both doing open uni courses, have lots of animals so decent chunk of time cleaning/feeding/checking theyre OK.

Talk about everything, family, music, news, films, games, what we want to do, work plans, food, future plans, weekend plans etc.

OctoberOrchid Mon 20-May-19 20:44:41

OP nothing wrong with your thread, it's an interesting topic. Those moaning had a choice to not read and reply. Good grief

FiremanKing Mon 20-May-19 20:45:56

Childless couples = having fun, getting laid, having a lie in whenever they want and having a large disposable income.


Sarahlou63 Mon 20-May-19 20:46:27

Neither me (56) or OH (65) have or ever wanted children (we've been together 10 years). However we have amassed 20 animals - horses, dogs, cats, pigs and goats - and soon to be augmented by 6 chickens to replace the ones the bastard foxes ate - so life is very full!

Sarahlou63 Mon 20-May-19 20:48:11

Oh, and we drink lots of wine and run around naked. Bet you don't do that OP grin

Mumoftwoyoungkids Mon 20-May-19 20:48:32

We were married for nearly10 years before dd and yet I can’t really remember what we did.

Worked a lot and shagged a lot I think!

Sn0tnose Mon 20-May-19 20:48:53

We do whatever we want to!

Monday to Friday it’s usually an early night for my DH as he starts work at some ungodly hour so I’ll either go with him and sleep, read, go on the internet, or have a soak in the tub, or watch a film. We don’t like doing housework at the weekend so he does some when he gets home and I’ll do some when I do.

DH is usually up early at the weekends and I like a lay in, so he might go and play a round of golf and bring breakfast home with him. We might get the papers and go and sit in the pub garden with a glass of something cold. We might have a mooch about town or go food shopping. I might do my hobby and he might watch tv. We like eating out quite a lot, so will probably do that. Or just go off for a day out together. Depends on the weather and whether we’ve got any big bills to pay that month.

Littleduckeggblue Mon 20-May-19 20:49:46

Weird thread OP.
So you have nothing in common with your DP apart from the fact you have kids together? You genuinely can not remember what you did before they came along?!?

Whatdoyouknowwhenyouknownowt Mon 20-May-19 20:50:51

Play with our dogs, talk a lot, cook, clean, nap, garden, volunteer, look after parents, bit of outdoors stuff last week, retired early, all good.

Not a NT property visitor...

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