Child's Passport Issue in Divorce

[Margs01]

Hi there,

Can anyone help? I am in the process of divorcing my husband. We both share parental responsibility, however, I am our DS's main carer. Our son is 12 years old and regularly visits his grandparents abroad with my husband. My husband is abusive and very disruptive. I'm in the process of trying to make an agreement with him about what should happen when either of us wish to take our DS out of the country for a holiday. I have asked my husband to agree that when he returns our DS to me each time that he also returns DS's passport back to me same day. This will avoid any game playing on my husband's part, which he is more than prone to do in every situation. As my son's main carer am I legally entitled to ask for this or keep DS's passport with me until my husband requests it? H is about to take DS on a trip and I'm dreading the game of getting his passport back. I understand I can create a court order etc., but legal fees are draining me of my cash, so any advice would be much appreciated!

[Fluffyears]

Report it lost and get a new one? Fuck game playing.

[whenthewhistleblows]

Who has the passports at the moment?

[whenthewhistleblows]

And who is the resident parent?

[Spokk]

I think you can get a second passport if you want but as a minor, you need details of the father’s passport. I had loads of fun with this one. They’ll SAY you don’t if you call to ask, but you do.

[Margs01]

Thanks for the replies. I have the passport and am the resident parent.

[FizzyGreenWater]

I would tell him that the first time he plays silly buggers with the passport, you will report it lost, get a new one and that will be the end of agreeing to grandparent visits without HIM taking it back to court and getting an order, which is going to cost him £££ and mean fewer visits. If the passport comes home - ie stays at your DS main residence - then all will run smoothly and you'll fully support grandparent visits as you always have done.

And if you don't have an official residency order, get one now. Then you are legally the 'resident parent' in a way he isn't.

[NorthernLurker]

What country is it? Do you feel confident he will return ds?

[Peacocking]

Who signed the passport forms? Only the parent that signed them is able to report a passport lost or destroyed.

[whenthewhistleblows]

I’d be wary of reporting it lost if it isn’t actually lost - I’m sure that must be an offence.

Do you want the passports returned so that you can travel with the children/have identity proof, or are you worried that he will take them out of the country on another trip without your consent?

Are you able to tell us which country the grandparents live in? (Even some countries signed up to The Hague convention have poor track records of enforcing it).

[HaventGotAllDay]

Remember that technically neither of you can take the child out of the country without the other's permission so if he fucks about over not giving the ppt back, you withdraw your consent.
Is your husband a national of another country? Does the child have c/ship of that country (and therefore possibly another travel doc)

[Spokk]

Not so. I had a look at my legsl docs and it said that either could take out of country for up to a month without permission. And this was a nasty legal break up.

[Dramatical]

I would be more concerned he is returning your child, not the passport.

What games is he going to play if he has a passport? I don't get it.

You are happy for him to take your child abroad but not to look after a passport in the uk?

[whenthewhistleblows]

Hi Spokk - I thought that was only the case if you’d gone to court for a specific order to stating that?

I’ve always had my ex sign a letter of consent whenever I’ve travelled overseas with the kids. (My solicitor did the first one and now I just use that as a template). I’ve never had to produce the letter so far but have been asked a few times what my relationship is to the kids (they have a different surname to me and one of them has a different nationality passport to me). We’ve only travelled in the E.U. though and of course that’s pre Brexit.

[HaventGotAllDay]

Being asked to provide the letter of consent is still not widespread unless you're going somewhere like the US or Canada, but is becoming more so. I am happily together with dh, and regularly travel abroad alone with dd. Home office guidelines have been to take a consent letter just in case ever since I worked for the relevant govt dept way back in the mid nineties. I am asked to produce a consent letter about 25% of the times we travel.

[Spokk]

Whistle- no, it was just stated in the remarks. While the case was going on, neither could take lo abroad. Ex asked for letter and I let him know it wasn’t needed.

[GreenTulips]

What games is he going to play if he has a passport? I don't get it

Like take the child any time he fancies out of the country without OPs knowledge or agreement? Maybe? Wild guess?

[Dramatical]

Like take the child any time he fancies out of the country without OPs knowledge or agreement? Maybe? Wild guess?

I asked OP because I was looking for something that wasn't a wild guess.