I know that everyone is different, each person grieves in their own way and that it's normal for that person. I'm coming up to 2 years without my mum and this anniversary looming is far worse than the first.
Someone I know has recently been bereaved and I understand her sense of loss even though her grief is different to mine but when I saw comments people had written to her it made me think about the things people said to me via text or in person.
Perhaps people don't know what to say or are afraid of saying the wrong thing. I never found the following very helpful.
"Stay strong".. I had been strong, I nursed and sat by her bedside I was there when she died. What is there now to be strong for? it made me feel as though I shouldn't grieve.
"Remember all the good times". When I was first bereaved remembering anything but her last few days was hard. I was consumed by feelings of loss and sadness.
"She will always be with you" - I never found this comforting.
I know some will disagree however death isn't a topic openly discussed and of course people want to comfort but I do wonder if we talked more openly then platitudes would be less.
Is there anything you'd rather someone not say?
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Grief, things that people said that didn't comfort me.
252 replies
QueenOfIce · 18/01/2019 11:23
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