OH not happy about holiday

[BingsAWankerSoHeIs]

My friend has just split up with her fiancé. She's distraught, they had a holiday booked for two weeks time

She's begging me to go, she won't even take any money off me for it - gorgeous hotel - very nice of her. She is distraught

OH of just under a year isn't happy..

It'll only be a week..he doesn't want me to go even though we have no plans for that week

He's being a dick, isn't he?

We don't live together or anything

[SinkGirl]

Of course he is.

[hidinginthenightgarden]

Depends if he is just said "I'd rather you not as i'll miss you" or "no way, you can't go!"
If former, not a dick but would still go. Latter, being a dick and definitely go!

[user1471459936]

Has he said why? Seems odd. Try getting the room switched to a twin!

[BingsAWankerSoHeIs]

It's definitely a "I'm not happy about this" - opposed to "you're not going"

Never ever had any trust issues in our relationship. No back story at all, just plodding along

Tbh I'll miss him like mad but I'd like a wee break and the place looks lovely

[Butterymuffin]

Yes, what's his reason for not wanting you to go? A nice partner would be glad you were getting a free holiday.

[CrispbuttyNo1]

Mates before dates.. your friend is likely to be in your life a lot longer than the bloke by the sounds of it.

[BingsAWankerSoHeIs]

I think he thinks holidays with friends are for those of 21 years of age..

I'm going 😂

[flowery]

Why would he not be happy, if you have no plans? How odd!

[Butterymuffin]

Thinking about it, is he imagining it will be your friend attempting to pull blokes and you along for the ride? In which case tell him not to be daft, it'll be a friends together for moral support relaxing time. And go.

[ElspethFlashman]

That's really really wierd, tbh. I can't imagine a scenario where my partner objected to me going on a holiday with my friend.

I think you need to show him how independant you are. He's only a boyfriend of a year, he doesn't have to be a boyfriend much longer if he doesn't trust you.

[ThanosSavedMe]

Definitely go. If your bf objects tell him to get over it. Plenty of other men out there

[BingsAWankerSoHeIs]

OH is lovely. Usually. We are very happy and he's never expressed any opinion on anything I've done, until this

Ah well, if he's gonna be a dick over a week long holiday then maybe the relationship isn't as perfect as I first thought

[pompomcat]

You should go, support your friend and have a lovely little break. Don't let your OH make you feel guilty at all (why on earth is he not happy to let you go?!)

[flowery]

Not much of a boyfriend if he doesn’t think you getting a free holiday in a gorgeous hotel isn’t a great opportunity for you!

[flowery]

Double negative there. You know what I mean!

[BingsAWankerSoHeIs]

Maybe it's the newly single thing.....

[dingdongdigeridoo]

How weird. Does he think your newly single mate is going to be on the pull? Maybe he thinks you’ll be tempted away! Kind of a dickish attitude to have if he trusts you.

[notacooldad]

I'm so glad you are going.

My son was chatting with me about a friend of his from school who has just come out of a relationship. The boyfriend would not allow her to have friends, talk to my son and the gang and she could only go out with him ( the bf) She's a beautuful18 year old who should be part if a crowd and having fun.
That boyfriend has now dumped her and she has to start all over again, makiby friends but has lost her confidence and self esteem.
Who the fuck do these guys think they are!

[Whatsnewwithyou]

Maybe not quite a red flag for your boyfriend but definitely close! It's a sign he could become controlling in future I think.

[youarenotkiddingme]

You're going - good decision.

It'll tell you what your need to know about OH now - rather than a few years down the line.

I'm sure if he's as lovey as you think it'll
just be concern over imagined stuff rather than control.

Enjoy your holiday!

[huggybear]

I don't know tbh. I'd be annoyed if my husband came home and said the same but only because he'd be using a week of annual leave which is precious.

[Chewbecca]

My friend did this for me in my mid twenties, she was a bit older. We had a great time that we reminisce on now decades later. Our friendship lasted longer than the BFs.

Go for it.

[LeftRightCentre]

He's not lovely, the masque is coming off is all. I wouldn't give him a second thought. I'd go on holiday and bin him.

[bringincrazyback]

I'd view it as a red flag myself. He could become more possessive if you decide to settle down together.

[flowery]

When he said he wasn’t happy and you said “what are you on about?” or similar, what reason did he give for not being happy?

I can’t conceive of DH being anything other than thrilled for me in these circumstances.