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Threads started in this topic after 9th November 2018 will no longer be removed after 90 days. A new topic called 90 Days Only can be found in the Other Stuff category of Talk.

Should i offer gift back to friend?

(7 Posts)
Bordercollies Sat 11-Aug-18 10:51:17

For birthday or christmas last year (not sure which but it was a while ago) my friend bought my DD a beautiful little wooden dolls house. Its small but a good brand and normal price is high. My friend told me she got it for a bargain price as tk maxx. My DD played with it sometimes but not a lot.

I have just bought my DD a larger doll house and so now this one is not required. I tend to donate all DD's old toys but my friends DD is a year younger than mine (4 and 3 respectively) so i often pass stuff to her so she can find if her DD likes it (things like happyland etc).

My friend much prefers wooden toys for her DD and i know she would have loved her DD to have the wooden dolls house but there was only one in tk maxx.

My question (finally) is this. Do i offer the dolls house to my friend before i donate it. I dont want her thinking we dont want the gift. Its is beautiful and i really appreciate it but i know she wanted one for her DD. My DD has outgrown it slightly but her DD is a lot younger. We are good friends so i would normally ask her but i am socially inept so just wanted to check i wasnt making a huge faux pas before i ask her. She is a very valued friend and i would hate to upset her!

HMC2000 Sat 11-Aug-18 10:53:51

Yes. Tell her that your DD has outgrown it but that it's such a lovely house you want it to go to someone who will really appreciate it, rather than just donate it. You know that she and her DD will because she showed such good taste when she bought it in the first place.

DontTryJustBe Sat 11-Aug-18 11:06:26

Absolutely yes! As above, make it clear that you were both very grateful for it and as it is such a beautiful gift you wanted it to go to a good home now that your dd has outgrown it. Can't see anyone reasonable taking offence at a kind gesture such as that. Ultimately though, if she is 'offended' that's not yours to deal with - you know your motive and intention are good biscuit

GreatDuckCookery Sat 11-Aug-18 11:32:44

Yes definitely ask her if she would like it.
She may have even bought it knowing it would likely come back for her DD wink

lizzie1970a Sat 11-Aug-18 12:18:55

I'd say your DD loved it so much she wanted to climb the housing ladder and upgrade to a bigger house so would her two like this one back. It compliments her on her buying a good presents and includes a joke. I don't see how she'd be offended.

Skittlesandbeer Sat 11-Aug-18 12:23:47

I think that it’s too soon to offer it back without seeming rude. Hold onto it for another year, and offer it then, by all means. She’ll be grateful then and you can legitimately claim your DD has out-grown it.

6 -12 months is too soon, especially since you’ve bought a similar thing. If it was a VERY close friend, and my DD was into Lego not dolls I might pass it across this soon, but not otherwise.

Bordercollies Sat 11-Aug-18 13:18:19

Thank you for the replies. The doll house she gifted is very tiny with just one floor and a bit of space where the roof comes off. The one i have bought is quite large with lots of rooms. Not sure if it makes a difference but although they are both dolls houses they are very different. The gifted one is the everearth one. About 18 cm high. The one ive bought is an elc one. And its about 2 foot high. I may give it a while and maybe sound out my friend as to what her DD likes at the moment. If she is really into dolls and imaginative play i might use that as an opener to offer it back.

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