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Parents growing older(4 Posts)
Now that I’ve my own kids I suddenly see how precious my parents are and how precious every moment of all our remaining lives are. They live a good few hours away from me and my in laws a few minutes from me. Our house is chaos and quite exhausting for them with all my kids being small right now. But can any of you with grown up children and grandchildren tell me what sort of things from you kids and grandkids make you happy now? What sort of things do your children or could your children do that would make you feel loved and supported and valued? I sometimes feel I should just send a bunch of flowers for no reason or book them a special trip away or something. I have started getting into something they both have loved for years as a hobby and I think it makes them happy to share that hobby and their advice with me.
Any ideas of how to make these years really count? I try to include them in our life a lot but realise that every time I come away having gained more from them and they are very happy to see us but pretty tired!!
I've much older children teens and twenties, all grandparents have really appreciated gifts that have involved time and effort not necessarily money from my DC's. For Christmas they make things, one year they made little Santa sacks from felt and baked mince pies and cookies and put them in with other little things. They've also made homemade body scrubs and knitted scarves (very easy knit ones) and things like that. It's the time and effort that shows they live then not just putting their names on a card and present bought by you. I've also found flowers to be really appreciated but I only send on occasions like Birthdays. Like you I'm at a distance so can't physically be there.
I have grown sons and 4 grandchildren. All are very busy I understand that completely.
I would appreciate a phone call each week/fortnight and it would be great if one would just drop in now and then when they are free, even for 15 minutes. The whole arranging thing with texts flying back and forth, people feeling pinned down spoils the spontaneity but seems to be the thing to do now. I'd like one of them to just sit in the garden with me and admire my hard work, it's my hobby but none are interested.
Just to be thought of apart from birthday or Christmas would also be great. To be included somewhere during long bank holidays for example, just invited for a meal or evening at some point, join in taking the kids to the park/anything to feel included in family life not hear about their days/evenings/barbeques with friends.
Real photos of the children/family can be treasured and looked at rather then just be on the computer. I love a picture drawn at nursery/school just for me and treasure those.
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