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How to explain missing bear?

(35 Posts)
doomclaw Wed 23-May-18 21:10:27

Help! DS (2) has a special bear. Bear definitely went to nursery today (confirmed by DS and head of room) but was missing by pick up time. Searched around but couldn't be found.

Suspect it has gone home in another childs bag. Told DS bear has gone for a sleepover at a friends. If he doesn't turn up tomorrow what story can I tell DS that sounds like bear is having a nice time?

None of this would have mattered if bloody DH hadn't lost the spare, identical bear a few months ago then done nothing about finding a replacement like he said it would.

doomclaw Wed 23-May-18 22:28:19


Pebblespony Wed 23-May-18 22:30:18

Get a new one and say he regenerated like Dr Who? Sorry, no real advice!

WheresTheEvidence Wed 23-May-18 22:30:46

As a room leader in a nursery I say please dont bring in valuable teddies as we have enough to do caring for the children than keeping track of where a toddler has dropped or misplaced their special friend.

doomclaw Wed 23-May-18 22:41:56

Unfortunately it doesn't seem to be available anymore.

The bear was bought as something to use for settling at nursery when he first started so it wasn't special at that point but has become important to him over time.

I am sure that I have seen similar posts on here before with brilliant stories. Sadly I am quite unimaginative myself.

Pebblespony Wed 23-May-18 22:47:24

That's a pain. Make sure you replace it with the most generic, widely available toy ever! Good luck!

RunMummyRun68 Wed 23-May-18 22:49:01

Bear needs to send a postcard home to say he's found Mrs bear and he's now happily married and has moved out!wink

RunMummyRun68 Wed 23-May-18 22:49:48

Bear can send a friend to take over...

PomBearWithoutHerOFRS Wed 23-May-18 23:01:57

Teddy came to live with you while DS needed him, but now DS is a bigger boy, and goes to nursery so well, Teddy has gone home because Mummy Bear has a new cub who needs to start nursery and needs Teddy to help...

doomclaw Wed 23-May-18 23:23:00

Thank you! If it cannot be found then definitely a similar bear (plus spare) can be bought and come with a postcard or something. Ds does have a new born cousin so maybe bear has gone to look after him.

Pompom42 Thu 24-May-18 07:10:35

I think it's bad how the nursery don't take any responsibility for losing it. 3 or 4 times my DC has come home from nursery without the item she took in for "show and tell"
The items were given back on another day but one item in particular we never got back. They said it's because another child has the same one and therefore took it home even though it had the name on who it belonged to. Surely those parents would open the bag and think oh that's not yours etc we never got it back and that was a year ago now.

alwaysthepessimist Thu 24-May-18 07:18:31

Do you have a picture - maybe through the power of MN we could find a replacement?

GlitteryFluff Thu 24-May-18 07:30:13

Hope it appears.
But yes have you got a photo?

Ginmakesitallok Thu 24-May-18 07:52:40

Why do you need to come up with some sort of elaborate lie? Have you considered the truth - that bear is lost?

snotato Thu 24-May-18 07:59:31

Yes op-please post a photo.
I have loads of teddies, and each time I see a post like this, I keep my fingers crossed I have a duplicate. I haven’t as of yet, but you never know.

ShatnersWig Thu 24-May-18 08:14:50

I think it's bad how the nursery don't take any responsibility for losing it.

The nursery didn't lose it. One child put it down somewhere and another child picked it up. Unless every child has its own nursery staff to keep a full time eye on it every minute they are there, these things happen. It's like school - if you want to ensure you don't lose your valuable phone/CD/blu ray/whatever, don't bring it in.

HeadsDownThumbsUpEveryone Thu 24-May-18 08:17:34

Why do you need to come up with some sort of elaborate lie? Have you considered the truth - that bear is lost?

I would have to agree with this. If you start suggesting ridiculous things such as the new cousin has it he is obviously going to be looking for it when ever you visit or resent the cousin for having something he sees as special. You are far better to go with the truth and explain sometimes we lose things, its a part of life and being honest will make it easier for him to process and come to terms with.

Pompom42 Thu 24-May-18 09:36:19

No Shatnerswig they have a "bring" box and at the end of the session when everyone goes home the staff hand out the brings to the correct child or place it in their bag they bring in. They show the bring at registration time then it gets left in the box until home time. The child doesn't play with it during the session.
So in my mind it's down to the staff to make sure the right child goes home with the item they've brought in.

Pompom42 Thu 24-May-18 09:37:17

Shatnerswig but I realise this is only what happened to me and not what happened with the bear.

DarlingNikita Thu 24-May-18 11:24:11

I think truth is best too.

Also, maybe it will still turn up if it went home with another child?

sashh Thu 24-May-18 11:30:53

I'm sure MN can send a few postcards from various places showing where he is travelling.

Sometimes bears do this because they know another baby needs them but they usually send another bear, or another animal for the 'baby' they have left because the baby is now very grown up so needs a more grown up bear.

doomclaw Thu 24-May-18 11:36:46

It is possible that it will turn up in another child's bag today.

Not sure we have a photo but will have a look.

If it was anything other than this bear I would go with telling the truth. Also it seems harsh given it is not actually his fault so will consider our options.

YackityYack Thu 24-May-18 11:41:56

This happened to DD. A random teddy she really took a shine to and cried a lot over.

I found one on ebay, paid £30 bloody quid for it!! Then a friend in a different part of the country sent a postcard saying how teddy had been on holiday and had a lovely time but now it was time to come home and he had really missed DD.

2 years later when moving we found the original in a bag! So now teddy has a long lost twin!

spiderlight Thu 24-May-18 11:48:15

There's a great book called Tatty Ratty by Helen Cooper that tells the story of a missing rabbit and all his adventures, which add up to explain why he ends up in a toy shop looking a bit cleaner and slightly different.

Hope the bear turns up!

littledinaco Thu 24-May-18 11:54:38

I agree with explaining it’s lost, you think it’s in one of his friends bags and hopefully it will turn up. You can still say you are sure bear is having fun wherever he is, etc.

You can use this for the future to say ‘are you sure you want to take x,y,z out with you, it might get lost like bear did’.

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