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What did you do as a child that you look back on and are ashamed of?(83 Posts)
Two things spring to mind.
1. The one and only time my parents left me with a babysitter I picked up.the house phone and rang the number of a school friend who I had fallen out with that day and her mum answered. After a few seconds of silence I told her mum to tell her daughter she was a bitch then hung up. I was about 8. I had no idea phone numbers could be traced and I got into.serious trouble when my parents returned.
The second was ages about 12 so I should have known better. On a school trip.I was paired with a girl with slight learning difficulties. I was annoyed I wasn't with my friend. We were on a geography trip in a town and the girl I was paired with went to the toilet. I.decided to walk off and join my friend leaving the girl on her own. I denied all knowledge of her whereabouts and the trip was cut short when we had to all go look for the girl. I went back to where I left her and she was nowhere to be seen. She was found eventually in a shop with a man who was about to phone the police. I never owned up about leaving her and said she had walked off. Still feel terrible about it and few years ago I found her on facebook and apologised.
Cheating in a maths test
I still think about it now ('twas 30 years ago) and I'm still rubbish at maths.
Once went to a petrol station with a friend and our doll's prams, shoved some chocolate bars under the covers and left!!
Steal food from other kids lunchboxes at school. I was hungry and usually had nothing for breakfast. It was only recently it dawned on me that the teachers and head knew it was me but made out they had no idea when it was brought up at assembly. I think it triggered extra support for us as a family as a nun would come round with food and clothing for us. Plus one teacher would give me uniform and shoes her daughter no longer wore. I asked my mum if they ever told her what I was doing and she said no. I feel guilty as that might have been the only food that kid had.
Oh and when a dinner lady job came up and told us in assembly to ask our mums if they would like to apply my mum got it and started immediately. My kids now go to that school and I always feel like they tried to help us.
Didn’t speak up when a cousin threw a stone at a school window, cracking it, and letting the known trouble maker take the blame
My whole childhood is shame filled. I was ashamed because no matter how hard I tried, I couldn't make my mum love me.
I was ashamed when I was 6, because my mum's best friend's dh french kissed me. I was worried I'd made him cheat on his wife and she would be angry with me and get divorced from him and my mum would lose her friend.
I was ashamed because my parents found me embarrassing in public. I was loud or quiet at the wrong times. My laughter (with my friends,) caused them huge embarrassment one parents evening.
I took a sweet without permission once, encouraged by a friend. I was so terrified I had to hide it in my room.
I'm not "ashamed" but I look back and I'm shocked at my teenage self:
I set the fire alarm off at school and let another girl take the blame - she got expelled.
I used to shoplift quite regularly.
I cheated in a few exams.
I had a relationship with a married man who was a lot older than me just because I felt like it'd be fun.
I used to give hand jobs to basically anyone.
One day at school I said some nasty things to a quiet girl I actually really liked. I am baffled as to why I did it. I hated and still hate bullies and the sad look on her face is burnt into my memory.
We didn't have any other classes together and I enjoyed being paired with her. I literally can't explain my behaviour but it does make me ashamed.
We went on a school trip to London in year 9 (I was 14). I'd been chatting online to a man from London for ages. He was 32.
During the school trip, we were given a couple of hours free time. I jumped on the tube and met up with him. We went back to his place. He asked me to do all sorts of sexual things with him which I refused. He said "Fair enough" and walked me back to the tube station.
I have no idea what I was thinking. Things could've turned out so much worse.
I was part of a group who had to vote for the best new starter in our weekly meeting. There were 2 'candidates'. One was my little sister. I didn't think I would be allowed to vote for her so I voted for the other girl. She won by one vote. I've never forgiven myself. I confessed to my sister 2 years ago (this was 30 yrs ago) and she laughed while I blubbed and blubbed .
sweetboy that is so sad. However don't feel shame. If anyone should it's them.
I feel bad that I treated my parents with such disdain. I didn't want to be seen with them and would make it quite clear to them.
This is awful but when I was about 9 or 10 (old enough to know better) me and a friend stole a tin of spray paint from her dads garage and sprayed ‘spastics’ and an arrow on the bus stop outside the special needs school.
Me and same friend were allowed to go into central London when we were in secondary school first year and we found a purse on the tube with almost £200 in. We spent the money in the trocadero instead of handing it in.
I phone the fire brigade once. No idea how old I was, I think I was maybe about 6, so did know I was doing something wrong but didn't realise the full scope. I think I called 999 and whispered fire. Didn't think they would be able to find us. I was very shocked, mortified, upset etc when the fire brigade did actually turn up. I don't think I made my dad angrier.
I also once went swimming (again, not sure of age but over 8, possibly 10ish?). I went with friends (pool was a 5/10 minute walk from my house). I went with 2/3 friends. Was told to go swimming and come straight home. Except we bumped into friends from school and we ended up wandering around the park with them for hours after. My dad, again wen't crazy, thinking I had been snatched. I wasn't allowed to go swimming for a while after that.
We used to wait all lined up outside the classroom for the previous class to come out before we could go in, there was always loads of pushing & shoving and trying to trip them up. I actually did trip a boy up and he knocked his front tooth out. I have carried that guilt around with me for 30+ years I've never told anybody. We were all kept in & they wouldn't to know who did it but I never confessed and the whole class got detention.
That poor boy.
I pinched another little girl when I was at nursery school. No one ever found out and I wasn't told off, which is why I think I still feel bad. I went to primary school when I was 4.5yrs old, so I must have been about 4 years old. To this day I feel bad about it.
As a teen, I wasn't always very nice to my mum - I belittled her for being a SAHM when I was cross with her, and I know it really upset her. And she was a great SAHM. I've apologised since, though not in as many words, and still feel the odd twinge of regret or shame occasionally.
When younger than that, I used to pick up cats and throw them in the air to see if they'd always land on their feet (they did.) Bizarrely, they'd always keep on coming back for more, so maybe it didn't bother them very much Not "ashamed" exactly but it was a bit mean of me.
But overall, I don't think I did too much bad stuff.
I stole a Star Wars figure from a friend’s house. I was so guilt stricken I painted his uniform with blue airfix paint so he wouldn’t be recognised!
I was made to feel ashamed of everything else I ever did by my parents. How I walked, ate, drank, talked, wrote etc. I’m not ashamed of any of that now - it was all such bollocks.
This sticks in my head, I was around 8 and was being looked after by a neighbour as my mum had to work her day off. The neighbour had recently had a baby and was tending to him and she had put me and her other little boy ( aged around 3) in the front room to watch tv. On the dining table was a vase with 3/4 pampas grasses in it. I encouraged him to shake them around the room so their was a snow of grass seeds and fluff then I ran to tell his mum what he was upto. It must have taken days to get those seeds up. Just what she needed with 2 little ones to look after. I'm still ashamed when I think of it.
I’ve said some really wicked things to my wonderful sister when I was younger. Makes my toes curl when I think of it.
I resented my mum's disabilities and used to wish she wasn't unwell. That hurts to admit it as I love my mum to bits. I wouldn't change her for anything but I don't love her seizures. I was told they were my fault so I struggled too with that. I was 25 when I realised it couldn't possibly have ever been my fault.
I had a very intense crush on a female teacher at 12 and told all sorts of utter bullshit lies to my mum about her. Most of which were totally inappropriate and I'm not sure where it came from. I'm 99% sure my mum knew it was BS.
When the crush became one on a female friend at 17 and I realised I was probably bi if not gay - I was that worried that I've never told anyone. Sometimes think my aunty would 'get it' and help me but then clam up again.
My rabbits lived in a dark filthy hutch because my parents hadn't taught me to clean them. They seemed to think it was ok so it didn't occur to me (until I was an adult) that it wasn't. I recall crying because they were ill and subsequently died - with hindsight they should have been taken to a vet but as a small child I didn't know that. I love animals and still cry to think how they must have suffered.
Murane I feel similar about dogs we had at the pub I grew up in. We always had 2 (Alsatians, Dobermans and Rotties etc) and the poor things were confined to the back yard. They were never walked or given proper care. Their shit would be left until it absolutely had to be removed. They didn't even have a proper kennel just a damp garage and old mattresses to sleep on. The local kids would tease them and send them bonkers. Just reading a thread in AIBU reminded me of them and when I read about how those pets are loved and cherished. Our dogs never even got stroked or cuddled. They would be kept outside all day then let into the pub at night. I woke up one night and heard the dog yelping. Burglars had broken in. They managed to trap one dog in the loo and kicked the other one around the pub. It was a rottie who was as soft as butter. Mind you I was only 9 but when she came back from the vets I kicked up such a fuss and she was allowed to stay upstairs with us. I came home from.school one day and she was gone. She was no use so they got rid.
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