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Child safeguarding concern

(29 Posts)
Uniquack Mon 16-Apr-18 16:02:52

I don't know what to do, because kids will be kids and say all sorts of stuff, but this has me really worried.

One of my DTDs (9) friends (Y5) told my DD that she had sex when she was 4.

The mother is loud, swears, the DC are always dirty and ill-behaved.

Like I said, I know kids say things, but what would you do? I've thought of writing an anonymous letter to the school stating what my DD told me, but I don't want to cause trouble.

Bobbiepin Mon 16-Apr-18 16:05:18

I think if anything makes you uncomfortable then you should raise it with social services. If its nothing then it's nothing, but if its something you could be saving this child from sexual abuse. Aside from being dirty, are there any other signs of neglect?

QuiteLikely5 Mon 16-Apr-18 16:06:10

Ring the school

Ivegotfamilyandidrinkcupsoftea Mon 16-Apr-18 16:07:03

Speak to school

Aprilmightbemynewname Mon 16-Apr-18 16:08:12

Back in the day dc I knew thought kissing was having sex!! Maybe crossed wires?

JennyOnAPlate Mon 16-Apr-18 16:09:31

Find out who the designated safeguarding lead is at the school and go and tell them. Please don't be worried about causing trouble.

WeirdyMcBeardy Mon 16-Apr-18 16:09:56

Was going to say safeguarding lead at school too. Do not do nothing however.

WhoAteAllTheDinosaurs Mon 16-Apr-18 16:11:08

Yes speak to the school safeguarding officer.

OdileDeCaray Mon 16-Apr-18 16:12:16

Could be silly boasting if the child has older siblings or has heard playground talk or as already mentioned she doesn't actually know what intercourse is and is referring to a boy kissing or cuddling her or some other innocuous behaviour or she really has been molested.

As the mother is unnapriacgsnle I would just speak to the teacher or head teacher st the school.

Tell your daughter to steer clear of the child.

Coveredinbeeeeeeeeeeeees Mon 16-Apr-18 16:13:14

It's better to report it and it be nothing than ignore it and it be something serious.

BertieBotts Mon 16-Apr-18 16:14:54

It probably is crossed wires, but mention it to the school. They will have staff trained to assess the situation better than some random person on MN. They don't go in heavy handed.

BertieBotts Mon 16-Apr-18 16:16:04

Tell your daughter to steer clear of the child. confused - why??

Uniquack Mon 16-Apr-18 16:22:52

She is the oldest of all her siblings, and can be a bit of a bully. Thing is, so many of the kids in their class are starting puberty, and I would suppose most of them are aware what sex is.

DontFuckingSayIt Mon 16-Apr-18 16:25:22

When I was that age we used to talk about sex all the time and there were a few who claimed to have done it from infant years onwards. Usually with other kids (real or imaginary), occasionally celebrities grin, I don't think any of us actually knew what intercourse was. Obviously a young child talking about sex with an adult known to them is a different thing entirely.

Queenofthedrivensnow Mon 16-Apr-18 16:27:26

Please contact the school their safeguarding lead will take it from there

SomeKnobend Mon 16-Apr-18 16:37:08

Sounds like the sort of bollocks 9 year olds come out with sometimes tbh. I remember friends at school saying they'd had sex before any of us had.

chocolateworshipper Mon 16-Apr-18 16:38:31

It's better to report it and it be nothing than ignore it and it be something serious

^^ this

DianaPrincessOfThemyscira Mon 16-Apr-18 16:39:51

Really?! In Primary?! I don’t. We were still well into the ewwww stage then.

I think speak to safeguarding as well. They can advise and take action if needed.

Weezol Mon 16-Apr-18 16:41:35

You can call the NSPCC, they will talk it through with you and can help. The number for adults who are concerned about a child is 0808 8005000.

Uniquack Mon 16-Apr-18 16:44:16

Really?! In Primary?! I don’t. We were still well into the ewwww stage then.

I agree Diana - my DDs can't say whisper the word sex without pulling an ewww face. They think kissing is gross.

I'll speak to the safeguarding lead. I'd rather get this girl the help she needs if she needs it. My conscience won't allow me to let it be.

OdileDeCaray Mon 16-Apr-18 16:44:44

Today 16:16 BertieBotts

Tell your daughter to steer clear of the child. confused - why??

"the DC are always dirty and ill-behaved."

And the mother is an unsavoury type.

YBR Mon 16-Apr-18 16:50:07

As PPs said report it as factually as possible - what has been said. You can't know the truth and the best you can do is report to school or SS so the experts can make a judgement.

Uniquack Mon 16-Apr-18 19:23:06

The girl has just been over here playing with my DTDs and they want her to come for a sleepover!

MessySurfaces Mon 16-Apr-18 19:41:05

OP if it's true then she needs all the help she can get, I don't think you should be keeping away!! I second the advice re speaking to school - and to the nspcc for advice on how to proceed.

BertieBotts Mon 16-Apr-18 20:05:12

Put off the sleepover for now but I would not stop them from playing together, especially if you can supervise.

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